I am allllll woman! Granted I have the language of a sailor, a deep booming voice & laugh like Brian Blessed & I’m not exactly the most feminine woman but I’m definitely a ‘She’.
I hate & love people equally & have always been sexually attracted to any gender as long as they’re Read more… alive, breathing, remotely interesting, weird & wonderful 😁

Equally, as much as you’ll discover Kinks & Fetishes you do like & do want to try, you’ll also come across things that you really don’t like or don’t want to try (Limits). Set boundaries & stick to them, don’t be bullied & don’t allow anyone to overstep those boundaries, equally Read more… don’t overstep anyone else’s boundaries.
Trust your instincts & don’t be ‘told’ what you should or shouldn’t be enjoying.
This is YOUR journey & you go at YOUR pace with YOUR limits.
If someone has a Kink that you don’t like or you don’t understand, that’s ok, we’re all wonderfully different, we don’t have to like the same stuff but it doesn’t mean it’s wrong, it’s just their way & you stick to your way.

Don’t watch porn & expect that is how it’s going to be!
Play scenes can be tiring but often dangerous so don’t approach anything drunk or horny. You need your wits about you.
Don’t suddenly think ‘right who’s up for it’ as it’s hard to find someone who matches us AND matches our kinks. Patience Read more… is key.
If you discover a kink that takes your fancy, chances are it’ll change or evolve over time so enjoy the moment.
Be prepared for things going wrong & be prepared to laugh at things going wrong, it’s ok to have a sense of humour.
Approach BDSM with respect & remember it isn’t always about sex
Go to clubs or munches & observe
Find out what you like & how you’d like to approach it. Gain confidence in yourself before bringing others in but also be constantly willing to learn & adapt
Most importantly ‘Enjoy Yourself & Enjoy the Journey!’

I had this happen on here a few years back & I walked away instantly.
A dynamic is built on trust whether you are embarking on a relationship or heading into play. Play can often be dangerous so we all need to be open, honest & trust eachother.
The second that trust is wobbled it’s hard to Read more… get it back.
To me, being ignored is disrespectful manipulation & not any form of play. It is a hard limit.
No discussion about forthcoming actions is wrong as limits must always be discussed.
If this is his way then fair enough, we’re all different but you already know that this behaviour isn’t within your boundaries so go out & find someone who suits you better.

So as a sub I had in my mind, how I’d like a Dom to be but up until that point I had not found anyone who had played to ‘my level’.
Mr P and I had talked about what we liked, our expectations, negotiations and limits but I had been there before with other Dom’s. My way at that time way pretty much Read more… on an “Eat, Shoots, Leaves’ basis with play dates, I had also made this clear to Mr P.
Im Hypersexual so would happily sleep or play with most people regardless of whether there was a connection or not or if the connection wasn’t initially sexual.
Also I had spent 20 years as a Domme so I was yet to find someone who could make me fully submit as a sub and step away from that element of control.
Mr Ps approach was so different to anyone I’d encountered on here and the friendship we had struck up was already so strong that I didn’t think it was possible for him to also be that amazing as a Dom as that would be too good to be true. In fact I had given up ever finding the kind of Dom that I was looking for. Also because Mr P hadn’t spoke much about his past subs I guessed he was new-ish to the scene.
I was wrong on all accounts, I had literally found my perfect Dom. He was as Dark, experienced, deep and just ‘got me’. He even recognised my subspace and stopped play without really knowing me. He kept me hydrated and fed me chocolate. He not only made me submit that day, he allowed me to feel safe enough in someone else’s company to fully submit.
my expectations had been blown out of the water.

I met my partner on this site 2 1/2 years ago. I wasn’t looking for a relationship I was just happy with play partners. Also I had been on this site since the beginning so it was more ‘social’ for me as many of us had got to know eachother as friends.
He approached me at a time when I was getting Read more… nothing but d**k pics. His message didn’t require an answer, it was just lovely and complimentary so I replied.
we talked (and mainly laughed) endlessly for weeks and eventually decided we needed to meet for coffee. I wasn’t expecting anything as we hadn’t really flirted and it had taken so long to get together.
That first coffee was amazing, we just spent hours laughing but still not flirting so when he invited me to his the next week for a play date I still wasn’t expecting much.
The way he played blew me away! Exactly what I was looking for but didn’t really believe I’d find it as my expectations were quite high.
We talked about how we were happy to keep it at ‘play only’ but would continue to play with each other however we were both happy for each other to also seek out other people.
we spent so much time talking as well as playing that we became really close. That coupled with a nutty ex of his that stalked us and tried to destroy us, even joining this site to try and slate us just made us realise that we were actually totally smitten.
I then stayed over at his one night and never left!
I believe our relaxed approach to how we started, helped to build our relationship. That and the fact that we have just never stopped laughing.
But the key to finding someone on here has always been the same…..Slowly, Slowly Catchy Monkey! Patience is your friend, it can take months or even years as finding someone who matches your kinks is hard. Trust your instincts, set boundaries and stick to them and never speak to anyone or be spoken to in a way that you wouldn’t do in person. The early days on here was easy and many relationships were formed as I think there was just around 400 of us but the site is now so huge that it’s a lot more difficult so be specific on your profile (not that half the people read them) and set your settings to match.