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BACON !


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Posted (edited)

I was observing her enjoying her subspace.

Abruptly, she gets up and walked into the kitchen. Humming a tune barely audible, stark naked and starts preparing... bacon! I watch her a while longer, come up next to her, “...how ya doing? whatcha up to?...”

Her answer - “Bacon is better than you. You said you would die for me (I did not). Bacon actually died for me. Bacon’s love is real.”

Edited by Deleted Member
Posted

I love the pink soft tender pieces mmmmmm

Posted

Indeed Mickey10, separating those tender pink parts holds healthful benefits too.

Posted

Bacon for inclusion as...

▫️Rule: “There should be at least 1 package of thick cut bacon in the house at all times, unless I am away from the house on business for more than 24hours.”

▫️Protocol: “Whenever you purchase groceries, you will also buy me at least 1 package of thick cut bacon.”

Posted

I have zero tolerance for turkey bacon, non-alcohol beer and decaf coffee. Come on people, work with me here.  It’s time to inject some aphorisms** here.

▫️Bacon fixes everything.

▫️Bacon bits are like fairy dust for foodies.

▫️Bacon is the duct tape for the kitchen

**a pithy observation that contains a general truth

Posted (edited)

Well, the countdown is on for me; my premium membership is due to end on March 11th. My pervy reverts back to a free account then.  

If you are not chocolate, coffee or bacon, I’m going to need you to go away...unless of course you are a wanton sex slave girl, then of course please say hello.

So, here are a few more bacon aphorisms:

▫️BBQ’d bacon - the most powerful aphrodisiac known to mankind.
▫️Bacon is just another word for meat candy. 

Dear readers, bacon cannot solve your problems, that’s what 🍺beer🍻 and 🍷wine🍷 are for. 

 

Edited by Deleted Member
Posted

Q: What did bacon say to tomato?

A: Lettuce get together. 

 

Patient: "Nurse im suffering from bacon disease!"

Nurse: "Baloney" 

 

Posted

"That's too much bacon," said no one, ever.

Posted (edited)
On 3/12/2020 at 4:05 PM, Paige_8 said:

"That's too much bacon," said no one, ever.

No wonder I am feeling so much better since Sunday, March 8th. 

Well said Paige_8.

Daylight Savings time just means the bacon  comes an hour earlier. Life is hard. Bacon helps. Bacon cures everything. 

I need my bacon readers to help me out with my new book “50 Plates of Bacon”.

My fledging book’s premise goes along the lines of...  When college senior Anastasia Steele steps in for her sick roommate to interview Christian Grey for their campus paper, little does she realize the path her life will take. 

Seems trite and a vaguely familiar story line?

 

Edited by Deleted Member
Posted

What about the poor little piggies? 

Posted
44 minutes ago, MsWhiteRose said:

What about the poor little piggies? 

They don't eat the bacon.

Posted (edited)
2 hours ago, LazyPiratesBounty said:

They don't eat the bacon.

▫️”Want to know just how good bacon is? To improve other foods, they wrap it in bacon”. - Jim Gaffigan

▫️Want to know what is good with single malt scotch? It’s sweet, savory, cheesy and meaty! 

Keywords: bacon, blue cheese, charcuterie, dates, 

Ingredients

12 oz pack of Pitted Medjool Dates about 20 large pitted dates

1 lb thick cut bacon cut in half

4 oz Point Reyes Blue Cheese

Instructions

Preheat oven to 375F. Line a baking sheet with tinfoil and place a cooling rack on top.

Cut the side of each date (being careful not to cut all the way through) and add a pinch of blue cheese and stuff it inside. Press the date back together and wrap each date with a half slice of bacon. If at all possible, try to keep the cheese cut-side facing up, with the bacon cut-side facing down. This will help keep the cheese from cooking out while also keeping the bacon wrapped around each date.

Bake for 20-30 minutes or until the bacon is cooked through.

Source Attribution - https://grilledcheesesocial.com/2019/02/12/bacon-wrapped-date-bouquet/

Edited by Deleted Member
Posted (edited)

Bonjour readers, you are going to have to work for this piece of BACON! And, if you are kinky, on some level, you already know the Top and bottom role. This little savory detour is like a meaty scavenger hunt gone awry. Fasten your seatbelts, cinch up your rope bunnies, and suspend your rigger imaginations.

 

Permit me to introduce you to messier John Fargginay. As far as I know (which is nothing), he is not related to Donatien Alphonse François, Marquis de Sade (R.I.P.) famous for his libertine sexuality.

 

John Fargginay’s fame rests with being a Parisian butcher with the ability to dramatically elevate his customer's mood with a secret recipe blending 11 popular pure essential oils with the essence of... yes, you guessed it bacon!

 

The year was 1920 and quite by accident John Fargginay, a Parisian butcher discovered the quintessential bacon aficionado aphrodisiac. Yes. Bacon cologne. And, the fragrance does have top middle and bottom notes. Enjoy.

 

https://www.fargginay.com/questions-and-answers

Edited by Deleted Member
  • 4 weeks later...
Posted

This bacon related entry may be controversial. Given the global pandemic, not all readers may have on hand the supplies, provisions, staples and perishables.

 

Recipe: Bacon Chocolate Shot Glasses

Ingredients 

Maple Syrup Vodka

Bacon Strips 

Chocolate candy melts 

Shot Glass 

Toothpicks

 

Directions 

Wrap bacon strips around a shot glass and use toothpicks to secure them in place.  Microwave until crispy. Allow them to cool and pull out the toothpicks.  Coat the interior with an even coat of melted chocolate and allow to dry.  Pour in Maple Syrup vodka and shoot!

 

Frankly, I see no reason why the barware glass should be limited to a shot glass per se. Could just as well be a champagne flute, Bordeaux, Burgundy, wine glass. In the end, I am going to eat the chocolate and BACON!

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