BDSM in the Media

[cautiousswitch]

How BDSM has been portrayed in the media has been brought up in other posts but never really discussed in any detail.  This post I will be talking about fictional television, but feel free to add comments about any other forms of media.

The mistakes of television actually did a little good to prepare me for entry into the lifestyle.  There was a period in the 90s where it seemed like every police drama had to have an episode that took them into contact with a dominatrix (always a female because it's better for ratings).  They were always tall women with perfect bodies.  They talked in sultry, sensuous voices even when telling a cop about finding a dead body - and continued to flirt with hints of wanting to dominate the cop throughout the conversation.  And, naturally, every interview took place at their dungeon so they were wearing some ridiculous leather outfit.

A little bit rarer were the episodes of the true court shows where Bob is suing his dominatrix because she didn't spank him hard enough - such episodes do exist.  The dominatrix is dressed for court and didn't always dress to impress.  She's probably average height but seems extremely short compared to the common concept that television has already made of what she should look like.  As the case proceeds and the plaintive and defendant start to argue with each other her voice always gets more whiny. 

The contrast and being smart enough to realize which more accurately reflected reality, prepared me well for when I started to actively participate in the lifestyle.  Sure, it's  bonus if your dominatrix is drop dead gorgeous, but don't get caught up in looking at looks.

Interestingly enough, I think the best representations of dominatrices are in comedies.  They use whatever look has the best comic effect for the situation which is normally the person you would least expect.  But the very nature of kink is that there is no set personality for it, so everyone in it is in one way or another the person you would least expect.

[ey****]

2 hours ago, cautiousswitch said:

There was a period in the 90s where it seemed like every police drama had to have an episode that took them into contact with a dominatrix (always a female because it's better for ratings)

Well, inevitably - male pro-Dominants exist but are rare

2 hours ago, cautiousswitch said:

They were always tall women with perfect bodies.

Now that is more for the ratings  

2 hours ago, cautiousswitch said:

But the very nature of kink is that there is no set personality for it, so everyone in it is in one way or another the person you would least expect.

That's very true and there's lots of people follow a lot of different routes.

Media, in general, tends to follow tropes - and I won't say I *blame* media as such, but it already creates unrealistic expectations for those coming in.  And, I won't say so much mistakes as such, but that it sets very much a bar for the people at home to 'get'

The media in general is quite... they don't want to explain a backstory to an cameo character.  So they role out a fairly generic stereotype.

The print press also - they've had things a bit more topical now but the only "we interviewed an actual Dominatrix" will always have some of the same questions ("what is the strangest thing anyone asked for?") and pushy questions trying to break client confidentiality that always ends with the story of "the CEO who bosses people about all today who comes for relief" 

TV pretty much never is interested in lifestyle relationships as such.  It doesn't need to explore them.  

Some probably prefer it that way.

[Deleted Member]

I have seen many on here who sport the classic Dominatrix look and wear it well, it saddens me that I don't switch at times 😂. They look great and it's not just the look but the aura some carry, attractive in many ways. As you say though real world is not real life but some on here IF they are real look good enough for tv 😊

[TemptressM]

I remember an episode of CSI that had that Domme in it that was so smooth in the way she walked and talked and I thought to myself that there was no way I would ever be able to be like that lol 

[Deleted Member]

Ohh I remember that CSI episode, partly because I *really* coveted her outfit (really should have suspected something sooner). I'm actually on here thanks to a videogame that featured a really positive BDSM relationship option that prompted much googling (it's Dragon Age Inquisition if any of you are gamers and want to check it out), beyond that the only one that sticks out for me is 50 Shades, but my biggest carryaway from that was 'Damn, Cristain Grey is a massive s***head'.

If nothing else we I can thank 50 Shades for showing me exactly what a good Dom ISN'T

Edited June 15, 2020 by Deleted Member
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