Dom and Domme.

[Deleted Member]

3 hours ago, Firewitch said:

Very interesting!!! Great thread and thoughts/ contributions.... best bit I read, apologies for no quote,  was that essentially you make it up,  carve out your own rules,  with the foundations of our lifestyle. 

I'm fully immersed in non mono/ poly and the understanding of getting different needs met by different people is so liberating!!! The challenge you may have is finding someone to subscribe to your ideal/ expectations and on that note I'd say be ready to flex,  which I'm sure you would. 

I will say this kinda growth and exploration is very exciting and demonstrates a real openness to being creative which is one of the beacons of what we all buzz off!!!!

🔥🔥🔥

I’d really like to see more discussion about non-monogamy and poly. Perhaps a munch theme? Because I think there is a difference between emotional/sexual/romantic monogamy although I’m very much still finding my way.

[Deleted Member]

1 hour ago, Curvykate said:

I’d really like to see more discussion about non-monogamy and poly. Perhaps a munch theme? Because I think there is a difference between emotional/sexual/romantic monogamy although I’m very much still finding my way.

I agree,  it would be a great topic to munch over.  As well as to bring challenge the critique of "another poly pick up", which really undermineds the lifestyle choice of many and may be seen as kink shaming. 

Further to that exploring ethical/ unethical non monogamy and how that's managed when considering multiple connections/ relationships/ friendships.

Facing the challenge of living outside the hetero normal formula that's perpetuated throughout society and certainly ripples in this community. 

Expectations of partners and in turn their partners,  managing the minefield of information sharing and secrecy v privacy. 

How each of these ebb and flow, I find it a very organic way of being that appears to sate my appetite to some extent!!

 

🔥🔥🔥

[Deleted Member]

1 hour ago, Curvykate said:

I’d really like to see more discussion about non-monogamy and poly. Perhaps a munch theme? Because I think there is a difference between emotional/sexual/romantic monogamy although I’m very much still finding my way.

This is only something I've been mulling over the last few months, i called it poly but it was actually non mono. How you could make it work and still be 100% committed to only one person.

[li****]

2 hours ago, Curvykate said:

I’d really like to see more discussion about non-monogamy and poly. Perhaps a munch theme? Because I think there is a difference between emotional/sexual/romantic monogamy although I’m very much still finding my way.

I'd really like to see this also as a munch theme. @Annalou has given me and @PixieDust free reign on what topics to being to the munches every week and I'd really like to see this as the topic in a few weeks time. I'd really like to drop you a message about it to see if you'd be up for helping out with the topic but it's saying I'm not in your criteria, please drop me a message I'd like to hear from you. 

[Deleted Member]

40 minutes ago, Donnykinkster said:

This is only something I've been mulling over the last few months, i called it poly but it was actually non mono. How you could make it work and still be 100% committed to only one person.

Maybe think of it being a graphic equaliser...... all components making up the 100% .... certain parts being afforded more space..... working out who has access to your most intimate life/ private/ personal life... who gets the first and last text could be a gauge!!! 

[Deleted Member]

There are different forms of poly but I have to say I find it immensely confusing at times! Partly because I ended up being involved in something that meant I was a secondary partner but I didn’t go into with my eyes open. Still mulling that one over (and considering returning to it tbh). Those I know who have one committed partner and are non-mono say communication & hard work is the answer! 🤷🏻‍♀️

[Deleted Member]

25 minutes ago, Curvykate said:

There are different forms of poly but I have to say I find it immensely confusing at times! Partly because I ended up being involved in something that meant I was a secondary partner but I didn’t go into with my eyes open. Still mulling that one over (and considering returning to it tbh). Those I know who have one committed partner and are non-mono say communication & hard work is the answer! 🤷🏻‍♀️

I'm not a fan of primary and secondary notion... everyone has value and important to view each connection in its own merit... eg each combo (assuming all on same page) should have its own status and the need to prioritise can be problematic which goes full circle back to expectations/ negotiations/ communication of wants.... logistics/ domestics influence it as well.... do you have a "nesting partner" (one you live with) there's so much to explore and makes sense of.... makes my tummy excited!!!

[Deleted Member]

21 minutes ago, Firewitch said:

I'm not a fan of primary and secondary notion... everyone has value and important to view each connection in its own merit... eg each combo (assuming all on same page) should have its own status and the need to prioritise can be problematic which goes full circle back to expectations/ negotiations/ communication of wants.... logistics/ domestics influence it as well.... do you have a "nesting partner" (one you live with) there's so much to explore and makes sense of.... makes my tummy excited!!!

Made me feel so overwhelmed that I stepped back from it all! Maybe I could message and you might help me figure it out as I’m lost! 🤯

[Deleted Member]

53 minutes ago, Firewitch said:

I'm not a fan of primary and secondary notion... 

Agreed but I think that's more something connected to traditional poly, the "Graphic equalizer" you mention has much more flexibility in it, can be tweaked perfectly.

[Wo****]

Please do a munch on non mono/ploy.

I started off mono, a year ago, when I started on here. I'm now in a poly relationship with Pirate and my ex is also a playmate. It could well head in the direction of choosing a nesting partner (or not) and there have questions, insecurities and issues along the way but with absolute honesty from all involved it's been great so far.

 

I'm still figuring it out, tbf, but I see myself with one nesting partner and one (or more) playmates. 

I need my freedom, I need different things from people and I need my own space. Not sure I'd ever go back to living with someone in a mono relationship again.

[li****]

10 minutes ago, LazyPiratesBounty said:

Please do a munch on non mono/ploy.

We are planning on doing this topic for the munch the week after next hope to see you there 💜

[Bo****]

As a true anarchist....( Goodwin traits). I belong in no box,have no label! I do within respectful, n consenting limitations act to equally share in whatever mutual kinks are to be indulged in.........want conditioned, structured, predictable non exploratory experiences, fine. Enjoy, none of my business. But in the past, I have been berated as non scene ,for a very equal, respectful, fetlife style relationship of discovery.

The choices are simple? Be happy and sharing of honest feelings?...or conform to others' labelling hang ups?.......

awaiting labelling ,boxstuffing responses without a distorted dissonance of a care...not my business?🙏

[Deleted Member]

2 hours ago, LazyPiratesBounty said:

Please do a munch on non mono/ploy.

I started off mono, a year ago, when I started on here. I'm now in a poly relationship with Pirate and my ex is also a playmate. It could well head in the direction of choosing a nesting partner (or not) and there have questions, insecurities and issues along the way but with absolute honesty from all involved it's been great so far.

 

I'm still figuring it out, tbf, but I see myself with one nesting partner and one (or more) playmates. 

I need my freedom, I need different things from people and I need my own space. Not sure I'd ever go back to living with someone in a mono relationship again.

That’s really interesting. I was mono when I started on FL 18 months ago. Didn’t even know I was interested in poly/non-mono. Now I’m greedy. 😳

[Deleted Member]

Yesterday at 10:44 AM, Donnykinkster said:

Exactly that, maybe emotionally mono, sexually poly but for both there would I think be discussed limits when playing with others. Kissing for me is deeply intimate as an example and some things would be kept within the D/D relationship.

Could you play with someone without kissing? I have but I couldn’t do it again.

[Deleted Member]

5 minutes ago, Curvykate said:

That’s really interesting. I was mono when I started on FL 18 months ago. Didn’t even know I was interested in poly/non-mono. Now I’m greedy. 😳

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[Deleted Member]

4 minutes ago, Curvykate said:

Could you play with someone without kissing? I have but I couldn’t do it again.

Personally fucking love kissing!!!!! #mouthfetish

[Deleted Member]

6 minutes ago, Curvykate said:

Could you play with someone without kissing? I have but I couldn’t do it again.

Yes i hink you could especially if it were a sub be that male or fenale but maybe I will fund out one day 😊

[Wo****]

17 minutes ago, Curvykate said:

Could you play with someone without kissing? I have but I couldn’t do it again.

That one's easy for me as kissing is a soft limit for me.

 

Just wondering here.... kissing is often considered intimate, to the point it can signify a deep, emotional connection. (I think) Why?

We happily share body parts yet become hesitant about kissing. Well, I do.

Gonna pick that one apart....

 

I never thought poly would be for me, it just kinda happened and I'd not change it for the world.

I'm free to be loved loved, free to love.

[Deleted Member]

26 minutes ago, Firewitch said:

Personally fucking love kissing!!!!! #mouthfetish

And thats why I would want it held back, it is special 😊

[TemptressM]

Kissing has to be one of the most intimate acts out there,  I do not kiss my two subs that I play with and its for that reason ( I will be leaving soon and i don't want to get any more attached than I am).  

It's a connection and being able to feel things within that kiss.  I can get very close to orgasm just from a sexy kiss lol.  I do believe it is way more intimate than any other form of sex.

 

 

[Deleted Member]

11 minutes ago, Donnykinkster said:

And thats why I would want it held back, it is special 😊

I was deprived of kissing for many years by my vanilla partner. Greedy for that too now. 😳 Fire will laugh at me again, I know!

[Deleted Member]

19 minutes ago, LazyPiratesBounty said:

That one's easy for me as kissing is a soft limit for me.

 

Just wondering here.... kissing is often considered intimate, to the point it can signify a deep, emotional connection. (I think) Why?

 

For me it's more intimate than anything else, that is where you get to know each other, I can feel that person when I kiss them, can feel the bond and the intimacy runs deep

[TemptressM]

31 minutes ago, Curvykate said:

I was deprived of kissing for many years by my vanilla partner. Greedy for that too now. 😳 Fire will laugh at me again, I know!

Me too Kate to the extent of me getting drunk and throwing myself at him for a kiss and he pulled away.  

[Wo****]

It's partly down to insecurity I think.

I don't feel like I'm "good" at it. 

 

It could well be an emotional thing, I kissed my ex and actually enjoyed it yet I've never kissed Pirate. Partly due to *** I'll mess it up somehow, Idk. I have really, really thin lips and I always felt it mattered.

 

It's something I'm gonna ponder. I'd like to kiss Pirate.

[Deleted Member]

51 minutes ago, TemptressM said:

Me too Kate to the extent of me getting drunk and throwing myself at him for a kiss and he pulled away.  

That’s such a harsh thing to do to someone. 😟