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Always


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Posted

Always.

It was inevitable. The love she holds for Him. Gifted upon the first utterance of knowledge.
He opened her thoughts like a lotus flower, blooming in excitement for learning. ***ling back the layers she had created, assuring her she was safe, was loved, was protected from the tempest of her own mind. His Dominance buffering the blows she strikes herself with.

She begs forgiveness for perceived infractions, praying they are never true, second guessing every action, convinced in her own failure.
He walks her mind like his own home, comfortable, welcomed. Always.
She offers her words to be met with thanks but she does not trust it. Too long has she had thanks and betrayal. She gifts him her heart on paper, her soul in ink and waits for the day the bruises emerge.
But still she can't contain it. It needs escape and they are His words. She is only the conduit that puts soul to paper hearts.
But yet there was always a wall he held up. She wanted to seek him out, to explore his own brain and still, After, he shields.
She understands but it hurts. She knows she must earn the crumbling walls, must work for the unlocked gate. Must be tested and proven worthy to hold his secrets, to hold his heart. But still the distance hurts.  
He looks at her with those eyes and she melts into his depths. allows him in, welcomes him with open arms and bent knees.
She hopes. Hopes it is enough, perhaps it is too much too soon and she should have rationed out her devotion.
Not Possible.
Not with Him.
Not in this, the most important thing in her life. she could not hold back any less than she could stop breathing. but for Him she will try.
And so she holds her breath, hanging on the precipice of oblivion.

Trapped between her desire and his, she wishes him freedom.
***d bent and bound, she wishes him comfort. 
On her knees she wishes him to stand tall among giants.
she wishes. she hopes. 
Hope is a frail creature. too easy to loose and to hard to retain. but for Him, she hopes. she hopes she is enough, enough to please and tease and *** his mind so that she becomes his in every sense.
she hopes that one day. one perfect day he will explain. explain the walls and take her on a tour through the museum of his mind. she hopes to run among the catacombs setting fire to all the shadows. bathing him in the light he has given her.
He is her light and she hopes, reverently that she may one day be his. his touch like Lightening burns her, marks her soul as his. "mine" he whispers and she wants to laugh, as if he didn't know.

She has been his.
Always.

Posted

Thank you so much for sharing this piece red it spoke volumes.

Posted

Wow... stunning. This really brings forth the emotions and highlights the struggle to open oneself to another when there has been past hurt. Very beautiful writing. 

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