What’s the nicest thing a fellow kinkster has done for you?

[Wi****]

there so many people who have been kind helpful, patient and most of all supportive. I came to fetish about just over 2yrs ago very unsure of myself and not really knowing what to expect. But I found the lobby very welcoming it was and friendly. I soon made friendships which are fabulous, though fetish I've grown so much over the past 2yrs and I am still growing and learning about myself and the kink community which has been extremely supportive and informative. Fetish and the lobby now feels like a home and my friends are like my kink family. I am now proudly a sub for a lovely supportive and beautiful Mistress. There to many people id like to thank by name so I shall just say a heartfelt thankyou to all my friends here for your support, friendship, patience and putting up with my twisted humour I love you all. Super big willow snuggles ❤ 

[Deleted Member]

2 hours ago, Firewitch said:

I'm so glad you did,  I hope you do stick around 🔥😘

Of course I will Fire😘

[northern_dom]

Maybe we should concentrate on the positives..... Instead of jumping all over people's negatives. 

 

There are some amazing people here. People who I am proud to call friends and also people who I would happily help should they need it. We all need a shoulder from time to time. Just be human and have compassion instead of trying to beat people into submission which sadly happens frequently in the lobby. 

 

After all we are all human and no better than one another. 

[Deleted Member]

53 minutes ago, northern_dom said:

Maybe we should concentrate on the positives..... Instead of jumping all over people's negatives. 

 

There are some amazing people here. People who I am proud to call friends and also people who I would happily help should they need it. We all need a shoulder from time to time. Just be human and have compassion instead of trying to beat people into submission which sadly happens frequently in the lobby. 

 

After all we are all human and no better than one another. 

NorthernDom you have always supported me and I class you as a good friend even if it is us calling each other cunts and others deem it as rude, it is our way and so be it lol

Today in the lobby I saw a member try to belittle another because they were lonely. Someone jumped on them from a great height without knowing the full story and tried to shame them, thankfully the bandwagon was left to run by itself and no one jumped on it and it didnt turn in to a bun fight. We all need to support each other even if what we deem as "normal" is not anothers "normal". We are all different. We are all unique. None of us are perfect. Respect each other. We are adults are we not?

[Cade]

Nicest thing ever was to show me my desired lifestyle was, in fact, real and possible, acting as a positive example of such dynamics.

[Bo****]

Some truly awesome positivity in this post and the comments! Thank you all ,i feel inspired to share a snippet of my kindest kink  friendship gift.

I am truly thankful for so many superb interactions i have here in fetish. many of you posting here!

My return to this ,after  two decades of self- deceiving,duty bound vanilla pretensions,nay,repression ; well is inspired and encouraged by my wonderful ex fetlife partner. 

My journey has been tricky, and cost me many things . Health,jobs,businesses,family,wife, home, and maybe my "sanity"? After 20 years of zero contact,but knowledge of each other's lives( imposed by others' green eyed disgust at our shared bdsm past!) We reconnected. As friends, unconditionally and as easily as the night i crept out of her life,leaving her in post-orgasmic contentment ,taking my toxicity away from her life explorations. my intent...her freedom! 

She has helped,listened,supported,cared as i have ripped apart myself to expose my true sexual being,honestly and firmly insisting that i be free of my demons. The current fashion for covid has been awkward for in depth exploration of my self,kink-wise. But to have her say i was the least toxic male in her journey was true lesson in humility...... So ,though she will never read this, i thank my little slutty pixie for her support ( or pervy pixie on my shoulder,as she refers to herself!!)

My reward,not to savour her sweet lustful desires,but to be honestly happy for her vanilla fairytale reconnection ,older than our brief 4 years in London scene in 90's. 

and a huge Bald thanks to those kind enough to have read my warped cryptic scribblings,and been gracious enough to put up with my dark twisted humour......and valuable insights,support,and education i have been fortunate enough to find here.

Life,Love n Unity.🙏

Edited July 26, 2020 by Boldbald
Spelling typos

[Phoenyx]

The nicest thing?  You know, I could write a whole book, just on that subject.  It is like being asked, what is my favorite movie, or my favorite song.  There were so many instances.  Perhaps, the answer is more in the overall picture.

In the so-called "normal" world, I was just another drone, in that great hive, known as "The Rat Race".  Primarily, I worked as a repair tech.  But, I also took jobs as a machinist, photographer, carpenter, roofer, plumber, electrician, and occasionally, as a janitor---whatever kept food on the table, and a roof over my head.  I was even, on a couple occasions, employed as an engineer, during those few, brief moments, when the corporate world actually tolerated me.  I had no self-image, or really any self-esteem.  None were needed.  The secret to The Rat Race, was to mindlessly go through one's daily routine.  All, while focusing on the weekend, and that all-too-brief respite of freedom.

It is impossible to pick any one "nice thing".  So, for the moment, I will go with the very first.  Back in my mid-twenties, I was attending a few classes at the local community college.  The time was the very early 1980's.  Did you know that community colleges were still free to locals, back then?  But, I digress.  By my mid-twenties, my taste for fetish and love of leather were both firmly established.  Yet, the prevailing attitude throughout the 70's and 80's, was that only gay men were into fetish and leather.  But, I was not gay.  So, I felt alone and marginalized.

That is, until one day, when I was approached by a lady classmate.  She commented, that I tended to wear more than my share of leather.  By this time, I had begun to design and make some of my own leatherwear---jackets, coats, pants, hats.  So, she also remarked, that my styles seemed rather unique and eye-catching.  In here coy and subtle way, she seemed to be asking, if there was more to my interest in leather.  Somehow, I got the impression, that she already knew the answer.  Though she was married, she appeared to be coming-on to me.  Such red flags caused me to back away a bit.

Things truly became apparent, when she invited me to her house, for coffee.  However, she also said, that she wanted me to meet her husband!  Now, I was really confused.  I had heard of "swingers" groups.  But, those were only for couples, and I wasn't seeing anyone, at the time.  Honestly, I had no idea what I was getting into.

It was over coffee, that Saturday, that I first learned about "The Scene"---what there was of it, in the early 80's.  I was even invited to my first play-party, the following weekend.  There, I experienced my first flogging.  I even got to try my hand briefly, from the Dom side.  Needless to say, I did poorly.  But, I was assured, "Don't worry; you'll learn."

The Scene of the early 80's, was more like an underground resistance movement.  It was ***tered into countless small cadres, with each group knowing little or nothing about the others.  If a key person moved or changed jobs, all contact could be lost.  It would be back to square-one.  Plus, fetish outfits of the day, were little more than haphazard bits of this-and-that.  There was no real style.  They were more like costumes from "The Road Warrior".  The men seemed to lean toward the Punk-Rock look, with spiked ***rs, spiked wrist bands, and the occasional collar.  A few of the lucky ones (myself included) even had leather pants.  The ladies mostly went for the "biker chick" look.  These weren't necessarily the styles of choice.  It was more a case, of making use of what was available.

Thanks to those wonderful folks, who introduced me to The Scene, I soon felt quite comfortable in that environment.  The 1980's though, were truly hit-and-miss.  As I moved from town to town, I might occasionally stumble across a local group.  Or, if I was really lucky, I'd find a kinky girlfriend.  I made a rather provocative leather jacket for one lady friend, and a pair of leather pants, for another.  Plus, there were the countless leather wristbands, gauntlets, and spiked ***rs, that I sold over those years.  The 80's "Heavy Metal" scene proved to be quite lucrative for my tastes.

By the late 80's, I had become quite comfortable with my leather.  I always owned at-least two pairs of leather pants.  Moreover, I often wore them to dressier "vanilla" gatherings.  A buddy once complemented me on my pants.  But, he also admitted, that he was too afraid to wear such leather himself, as it might make him look "gay".  That mindset was still present, even as late as 1988.

Really, it wasn't until around 1990, that the gay men finally relinquished their hold on the public fetish scene.  The result was a veritable explosion of "hetero" groups coming into the light.  It was sometime in 1990 or '91, that I first learned of this development.  An old friend from highschool, now drove a truck for a major furniture and exhibition rental company.  He knew of my "interests".  So, I was hardly surprised, when he mentioned the underground nightclubs, where he had made deliveries.  Of course, I pointed-out, that these were all "gay" clubs.  "Not any more!", he replied.

It was in this new, huge, public Scene, that I soon found myself being treated like royalty.  It all happened so fast, and I was never really sure, why.  That though, is best left for another story...

[Deleted Member]

I'm new to this site, but i've had my kinks for years. Just recently i started leaning towards CG/l or DDlg, and i have made some amazing friends on other forums who have answered questions, and supported me through doubts, and confusion. I'm not hugely social, so you probably won't see me post here often, but i hope maybe i can find a few like minded people to get to know. The forum seems like a decent place with decent people <3

[ey****]

I've not been ignoring this thread.  I think there's been a lot over the years, for sure.

I think I'll think up some examples - maybe drop in at times.

[ne****]

A kinky friend was getting annoyed with my unusual eating habits. She plugged them into google, which I had never thought to do. Low and behold, my situation is now a recognized eating disorder (ARFID). While having an eating disorder is not really very fun at all, knowing what it's called lets one find others with it. I learnt that my case is somewhat mild, and that actually I've done rather well at coping. It would have been terribly helpful to know this when I was 10yr old. As I'm hypersensitive to smell and texture, with a very shallow gag reflex (I can just barely brush my molars), yes, it does impact my ability to perform and receive oral. I'm told I overcompensate on the performing side of things. Still working on the receiving side of things.

[ElleFire]

Love this thread!  As others have said, it's not possible to point to just one thing, but I know that my trip to the UK in May of 2019 to meet up with chat friends was life-changing. I've learned so much from so many kind, patient and wise people here (and funny, can't forget funny!). The constant support is a blessing! 

[ey****]

as a very simple example

Trust

anytime somebody puts me in a position where they trust me - that is a very nice thing.  

[Charms]

There are lots of kinksters out there mostly i meet on here who have supported me. Theres 1 iv know for 27 years before they or i were into kink. But they are my rock and my best freind even if we argue but then long time freinds do. But we always  make up.

 

Theres quite a few on here that have personaly helped me. But the 1 thats spent hours and dayssat talkinging to me ir messaging  due to personal things going on in my life is willow shes an amazing lady. I call her my queen not in a kink way but in as much as i need her an value her. The only other queen in my life is my mom. There bith very dear to me. Willows mistress is amazing  and not only understands our relationship  but is supportive  of it. So ty willow and thank you firewitch for letting minecand willows frendship  carry on and grow 

[E-dUbBs]

15 hours ago, sweet***sub said:

Maybe we should try to keep up with positive posting to try to encourage it throughout the forum 😊

Immense idea
it needs to stay been too much negativity which in my view can put a negative slant on everything eventually because it’s starts to become expected
Bravo Kate bravo everyone

My nicest thing has to go back to a group I was invited to way back when
I was chatting to someone new about things related to kink when a now good friend on site approached me to join
It was again a group of people who generally had the right idea and respected me enough to ask me to join
Some are still my closest friends on site
And it built me up to be better
So that’s my nicest thing and I thank those that were there

[Deleted Member]

I am finding it very positive to keep logging on and see the responses. Thank you all!

[Ba****]

When I joined a few years ago I was like a fish out of water but was made to feel very welcome and included, too many of you all to list but one person in particular helped me at a really shitty time in my life heres to you @lil-monster😘

[Ba****]

Sticky button lol

[Deleted Member]

3 minutes ago, BadTaste_Ted said:

Sticky button lol

I bet that's what you say to all the girls!!

[Ba****]

1 minute ago, Firewitch said:

I bet that's what you say to all the girls!!

That amongst other things lol

[Deleted Member]

Like Hels, I am relatively new so don't have much experience on this site. So far, I like how welcoming and supportive people are here. It makes a person feel comfortable to be themselves. I haven't been into chat yet, I'm not sure if I'll have time to, but I hope they are just as welcoming in there too.

[li****]

1 hour ago, BadTaste_Ted said:

When I joined a few years ago I was like a fish out of water but was made to feel very welcome and included, too many of you all to list but one person in particular helped me at a really shitty time in my life heres to you Lilm 😘

Awww thank you Ted!!!! We did go through a lot both of us didn't we?!! and you were one of the friends that was always there for me and I'll never forget it 😊😘

[Jinxy]

Thank you Kate for starting this topic! 
 

For me the biggest kindness people have done on here is just to listen to me. Whether I have a million questions, need to vent about life, or need to talk through a situation.... I’ve always been able to find someone on here that’s been supportive and patient with me. It’s been something I really cherish. 

[sm****]

One of the greatest things someone in the scene done for me was, when first starting, out many moons ago.  Done your regular newbie FUBAR, "we all have done it in the beginning, if we are honest with ourselves", but they seen something, took me under their wing, coached, trusted me, let me learn and expand,  then when they thought  I was ready let me spread my wings.

I have never forgotten this and think of these people quite often.

Edited August 2, 2020 by smeagol
addition to txt

[Deleted Member]

YES you’re so right!!