Orgasm Difficultly

[Th****]

Just a few points as most have already been made above I the excellent comments.

1. No matter what you must take her word for the fact that she does not have orgasms or walk away now. Your relationship is built on trust and this is an excellent of trust in action.

2. There are so many ways for someone to be non orgasmic. As detail is a little sparse I do not know if she does indeed climax but does not actually orgasm.

I have known two non orgasmic people one whom will most likely never be orgasmic as at the point of cresting she found that the sensation was entirely to intense and it caused a sensation akin to cramp. The other person only reached a climax but did not orgasm, good news there though. At 30 she decided to identify as bi and at last did manage to orgasm with another woman.

3. As has been mentioned already the mental state is 90% of an orgasm. So I know this is BDSM but you could try and assist this. She could take a relaxing bath, then light Scented candles, lower the lights etc. It may not work but it is a start.

4. If orgasm is your target do not tell her that, as has been mentioned. It is like with guys, the last thing you need when you are trying to relax is performance pressure. Just make this your goal she doesn't need to know. Then focus on her, the fewer distractions she has the more likely she is to be able to crest.

5. You will may have to instruct her on how to locate her G spot, some people have far more difficultly with this than others. Some people find exact instructions on touching them selves helps as it relieves them of personal responsibility in a way.
They can let go and just focus.

6. Last few bits at last,
Is she a masochist? That may be a route to orgasm with no sexual touching at all.

If she has *** or others in the same house it makes it far far harder.

Finally if you are considering a toy of any kind, if she doesn't have house mates or ***, I would recommend an Hitachi Original Wand with a variable control box.

They are generally used to *** multiple orgasms but are loud. Go easy on her with it at first on a low setting and slowly work up.

As the wand can be a little intimidating.

If she can't orgasm do not let it ruin things, there is so much more than that.

Good luck my friend and I wish you both the best.

[He****]

I didn't orgasm until I was 36. It was a psychological block stemming from childhood trauma (sexual ***), made worse by my thinking there was something wrong with me etc and putting pressure on myself.
My main issue was losing control - past events had violently robbed me of control of my own body, so my subconscious hung on to what little control I had left and I was filled with *** at the thought of letting go.
I eventually overcame this by visualising myself back in the scene of the original ***, but as an adult who actually wanted it - mentally, I took the power back from the man who stole it. Now... I have no such problems; it could also explain why I like to be dominated and have slight masochistic tendencies!
I don't know if your partner had any negative sexual experiences, and my story may be of no help whatsoever - other than to show there's still hope! As others have said, take the goal of orgasm off the agenda, just explore each other & find out what turns her on. And the mind is a powerful thing - stimulate this too. Best of luck x

[Deleted Member]

I have difficulty of reaching orgasm with men.  I never cum through penetration.  Most of the guys i have been with have just give me a quick rub/lick and then penetrated me but for me this isn’t enough.  I find vaginal penetration uncomfortable at times but recently found out that having dildo up my ass feels amazing (much better than vaginal penetration).
 

It took me until I was about 30ish (can’t remember my exact age) to figure out how to make myself cum.  I’m now 42.  I’ve been responsible for my own orgasm ever since.

 I found that tilting my pelvis helps (i have recently been told during a smear test that my cervix is quite high so i don’t know if this has any impact on my sex life). 

[Bumblecake]

It’s difficult for me to orgasm too. I think I would orgasm over foreplay. Next time we have sex I want to lick vanilla whip cream from her body.
 

I did however, have my first orgasm with this lady last week. I loved when she licked my pussy from the back and penetrated me until everything became blurry and my legs were shaking! 

[Deleted Member]

Get her a magic wand and ask her to discover her own body first. I know a lot of women who haven’t ever orgasmed or have only done so one or twice in their lives. Could easily be a mental block also.