General question to people ??

[Leatherlover123]

So I’ve had a love for leather, pvc or latex for around 20 years which has been getting stronger now it’s more easier to . So this all began with me just wearing my step mums leather trousers and now into full boots, jackets, skits, trousers etc pretty much all things, but now I’m really finding myself enjoying dressing up as a female in leather clothing and me taking anal sex is a huge excitement for me, I dont class myself as gay as I have a fiancée who knows about the leather but not the CD’ing. Has anyone else been in this similar situation as I’m struggling to think who / what I am atm. Any words of advice welcome ?? 

[al****]

Your girl friend will find outceventually. Who knows, she may even enjoy it.

[Deleted Member]

You don’t count yourself as gay because you have a fiancée? Have you considered that you may be bixsexual or does that make you feel uncomfortable? When you say anal sex is exciting for you - do you fantasise about a man doing that to you or have you thought of a woman using a strap-on? Your fantasies can be a good guide sometimes to the things you’re struggling to acknowledge. I understand you’re feeling quite lost but I would urge you to not get married until you’ve figured things out and been honest with your fiancée.

[Foxter]

Many straight men enjoy dressing up and/or anal sex. It doesn't mean you fantasizse about being with a man. However just be because you are with someone doesn't mean you cant be interested in more.

That being said, why worry about labels at all? Just do what you enjoy.

[Leatherlover123]

7 hours ago, Curvykate said:

You don’t count yourself as gay because you have a fiancée? Have you considered that you may be bixsexual or does that make you feel uncomfortable? When you say anal sex is exciting for you - do you fantasise about a man doing that to you or have you thought of a woman using a strap-on? Your fantasies can be a good guide sometimes to the things you’re struggling to acknowledge. I understand you’re feeling quite lost but I would urge you to not get married until you’ve figured things out and been honest with your fiancée.

 

[Leatherlover123]

Hi Kate, I haven’t really thought about it to be honest, I don’t have any sexual attraction to men as such I just fantasise about taking anal sex by either a woman with a strap-on or a man for real.  I honestly have no idea how freaked out my fiancée will be if I was to ask her to stick something inside of me 🙈

[Wo****]

57 minutes ago, Leatherlover123 said:

Hi Kate, I haven’t really thought about it to be honest, I don’t have any sexual attraction to men as such I just fantasise about taking anal sex by either a woman with a strap-on or a man for real.  I honestly have no idea how freaked out my fiancée will be if I was to ask her to stick something inside of me 🙈

Enjoying anal sex doesn't make you homosexual or bisexual, you might just enjoy anal sex.

Talk to your partner, maybe write her a scenario? Find out how she feels about it. I love receiving anal, not had a lot of experience of giving it until recently.  I absolutely adore it....

Start slow. Test the waters. See if she'd be happy to start with a small butt plug, or a finger, maybe.

If this is something you need in your life then you need to tell her x

[Deleted Member]

1 hour ago, Leatherlover123 said:

Hi Kate, I haven’t really thought about it to be honest, I don’t have any sexual attraction to men as such I just fantasise about taking anal sex by either a woman with a strap-on or a man for real.  I honestly have no idea how freaked out my fiancée will be if I was to ask her to stick something inside of me 🙈

It’s interesting to hear this from you as I’m a woman who hasn’t tried that kind of thing. But my partner might enjoy it. I suspect. I guess a way forward is to think about how important it is to you, how you might meet your need and how to raise it with your fiancée. Have you ventured anywhere near the idea so far?

[Deleted Member]

3 minutes ago, Curvykate said:

It’s interesting to hear this from you as I’m a woman who hasn’t tried that kind of thing. But my partner might enjoy it. I suspect. I guess a way forward is to think about how important it is to you, how you might meet your need and how to raise it with your fiancée. Have you ventured anywhere near the idea so far?

I mean I haven’t even stuck a finger in a man’s ass, I’ve had plenty of anal sex myself. I guess I might be a little like your gf. Starting small would help me get to grips with the idea. I realise that wanting to try anal sex doesn’t mean labelling yourself (and nor should I) but was just trying to help you explore what works for you.

[VoyagerX]

Let's get one thing straight!

Enjoying anal stimulation makes you neither gay, straight, bi... or anything else in between.

It is just a fact..... If you like it you like it!

From from a psychological point of view... There are three sexual stages to life... As you're growing up.

The the first is oral where gratification is experienced through the mouth.

The second is anal where you gain  pleasure, control and reward.

The third is genital... Where everything comes together to become a complete sexual entity...A a person.

Now it depends how much bite you take out of each cherry.

And and it really has nothing to do with sexual orientation. I believe that's more emotional.

I don't fancy guys in the slightest.

But but I do love anal stimulation.... both giving and receiving... from any gender.

I'm just not hung up on who's doing it!

Honesty is always the best policy.... Otherwise you just living a lie or otherwise denying yourself.

If you want someone throwing cream cakes at your genitals while reciting poetry...go for it!

Never be ashamed of what you enjoy.

If it's too much for your partner to take or understand..... Then you have to make some sort of choice don't you?

Best of luck x

 

[VoyagerX]

5 hours ago, Curvykate said:

It’s interesting to hear this from you as I’m a woman who hasn’t tried that kind of thing. But my partner might enjoy it. I suspect. I guess a way forward is to think about how important it is to you, how you might meet your need and how to raise it with your fiancée. Have you ventured anywhere near the idea so far?

😁

[ol****]

As has been said, anal stimulation does not make yoy gay. 

As @Curvykate said you do need to figure this out and you do need to talk honestly to your girlfriend. Telling her you have a  bit of a thing for leather is way short of what you have described. 

[Deleted Member]

18 hours ago, VoyagerX said:

😁

👋🏻

[Deleted Member]