Where to start

[Bbdee]

My husband and I don't know anything about this. My husband tried it with me years ago but all it did was make me scared and uncomfortable. Where can we get a proper introduction?

[Deleted Member]

There are lots to read on this site about almost everything you could learn on bdsm relationship and kinky sessions. From newbies to more experienced....

[Bo****]

Welcome, Bbdee. I hope you two find something in The Lifestyle that lights up both of you. The best thing to do is read, read and read some more. Try to find ideas that get you excited and then share them with your man. Have him do the same thing. Give each other space to read these things independently so there’s no pressure to respond positively. You’re looking for stories and examples where both of you are all “YES, I want to do THAT!” Just remember to take it slowly.

In addition to lots of articles on this site, just try Googling “Intro to BDSM” for dozens of articles from sex-positive people who go to great ***s to keep kink from soundly scary.

Good luck!!!

[Slimslam]

If he ties you to the bed you will be practicing safe sex you can't fall off the bed. A little at. A time before you know it

[Deleted Member]

If i may ask, what in particular made you scared and uncomfortable? Maybe whatever that was just wasnt for you. There are so many elements to experience. As someone said here READ do your research there are plenty of articles and books about it. Talk to others in the lifestyle , im sure there are plenty who would lend you thejr knowledge.

[cautiousswitch]

On 2/27/2021 at 5:32 PM, Bbdee said:

My husband and I don't know anything about this.  My husband tried it with me years ago but all it did was make me scared and uncomfortable. 

The way this is phrased it sounds like he just tried to dominate you without discussing it first.  That is a worst case scenario, but a little more detail can get you better advice.

What made you curious to try it? Was it a mutual experience or separate experiences? How did you get to discussing and what led to you deciding to explore it?

Of course people have already mentioned read and research before trying it.  Emphasis on read.  What is depicted in movies or videos is usually going to be either someone with more experience doing something or someone who doesn't really know about the lifestyle depicting how they think it is.  There aren't a lot of videos geared towards accurately showing kink from a beginner point of view.  Trying to duplicate something from a video with no personal experience should be scary.