Implements

[Ch****]

Hi All,
May I ask, do you have a preferable implement for sub punishment, or not, do you decide at the time or you follow an agreed protocol?
I would love to know thoughts and opinions from subs and doms...

[MsDrawers]

This sub doesn't like punishment at all. I love impact so that's usually an element of play and I like to please. I have never been in a d/s relationship where punishment has been an element. I'm also quite an organic kind of player so protocols haven't featured a huge amount either 🤷‍♀️

[Ch****]

Well said. Other thoughts ,opinions....

[to****]

I’m definitely more into rewarding good behaviour than punishing bad.
I’m not sure Dom’s that punish bad behaviour are ever really in control tbf.

[Deleted Member]

There can be many and anything for punishment. One, for example, is simply taking your attention away when she’s done something wrong and you really want to punish and she’s addicted to your presence it can be ***. Or, you can do a playful, every time she does something bratty or you don’t like, you tell her to give herself 5 spanks or you spank her etc. It could be anything get creative it’s fun. Also reinforcing good behavior with rewards and keeping punishments light I think is a good mix that doesn’t go too overboard.

[Deleted Member]

7 hours ago, InfinitewavesXTC said:

There can be many and anything for punishment. One, for example, is simply taking your attention away when she’s done something wrong and you really want to punish and she’s addicted to your presence it can be ***. Or, you can do a playful, every time she does something bratty or you don’t like, you tell her to give herself 5 spanks or you spank her etc. It could be anything get creative it’s fun. Also reinforcing good behavior with rewards and keeping punishments light I think is a good mix that doesn’t go too overboard.

Exactly this!!

I think the dynamic may be a bit different with male subs, well in my experience it has been. Their “punishment” is actually what they crave and what they are happy to do and rewards tend to be photos/videos of me (in the online dynamic).

The best actual punishment, if they step out of line, is always to remove my attention. I find this work best at ensuring good behaviour!

[Deleted Member]

Before starting your Ds and during agreements you should write what type of punishment for what kind of behaviour.
So it all depends of your sub is into impact play and how hard she can take it.
You could set up a gradual type of punishment. 1st write some lines with her left hand up to a harsh punishment like kneeling on rice for 20minutes…
Or a body map system. For example of she’s been mouthful ask her to brush her teeth with soap. Second time wash her mouth with vinegar or a bitter mix like angustura.
If she touched herself without your authority slap her pussy or use a flat wooden spoon.
Make her wear undersized undies
Ask to wear an outrageous bimbo type make up and stand in the corner of a busy street etc…

But I dont think you should ignore her or ghosting type of punishment! This is more like a mental ***

[Deleted Member]

54 minutes ago, FabSeverus said:

Before starting your Ds and during agreements you should write what type of punishment for what kind of behaviour.
So it all depends of your sub is into impact play and how hard she can take it.
You could set up a gradual type of punishment. 1st write some lines with her left hand up to a harsh punishment like kneeling on rice for 20minutes…
Or a body map system. For example of she’s been mouthful ask her to brush her teeth with soap. Second time wash her mouth with vinegar or a bitter mix like angustura.
If she touched herself without your authority slap her pussy or use a flat wooden spoon.
Make her wear undersized undies
Ask to wear an outrageous bimbo type make up and stand in the corner of a busy street etc…

But I dont think you should ignore her or ghosting type of punishment! This is more like a mental ***

Ignoring her isn't good, but you think telling a woman to wash her mouth out with soap is ok?

[Deleted Member]

11 hours ago, MsDrawers said:

This sub doesn't like punishment at all. I love impact so that's usually an element of play and I like to please. I have never been in a d/s relationship where punishment has been an element. I'm also quite an organic kind of player so protocols haven't featured a huge amount either 🤷‍♀️

I am with you on this. I've had plenty of spankings to bring me back into line, I don't consider them punishment but a rebalancing of the dynamic. I can see it might work differently with someone who is more bratty perhaps? I'm there to serve and please, not be treated like a truculent child.

[MsDrawers]

2 hours ago, Curvykate said:

I am with you on this. I've had plenty of spankings to bring me back into line, I don't consider them punishment but a rebalancing of the dynamic. I can see it might work differently with someone who is more bratty perhaps? I'm there to serve and please, not be treated like a truculent child.

Oh yeah, that I hate. All that naughty corner business can just get in the bin. If it works for you, that's absolutely marvellous of course, but I see no reason to insist on the language of punishment and discipline if that doesn't work for your partner. To be honest, I don't even view it as dynamic-balancing though I can see it absolutely works that way. For me it's mentally and emotionally cathartic, extremely arousing and deeply intimate. Nothing in that speaks of punishment, to me. 

[Deleted Member]

8 minutes ago, MsDrawers said:

Oh yeah, that I hate. All that naughty corner business can just get in the bin. If it works for you, that's absolutely marvellous of course, but I see no reason to insist on the language of punishment and discipline if that doesn't work for your partner. To be honest, I don't even view it as dynamic-balancing though I can see it absolutely works that way. For me it's mentally and emotionally cathartic, extremely arousing and deeply intimate. Nothing in that speaks of punishment, to me. 

It's all of those things but also puts me back in the right headspace. If that's what other subs enjoy from a Dom - have at it - but I'm not entirely sure that new subs realise they don't have to go for that punishment/discipline approach. Or even older ones 😆. Its supposed to be enjoyable!

[MsDrawers]

5 minutes ago, Curvykate said:

It's all of those things but also puts me back in the right headspace. If that's what other subs enjoy from a Dom - have at it - but I'm not entirely sure that new subs realise they don't have to go for that punishment/discipline approach. Or even older ones 😆. Its supposed to be enjoyable!

Exactly! That was really what I was driving at. If it works for everyone, have at it, but there's no right way or only way to do anything (assuming all the usuals). 

[Deleted Member]

Sorry OP not meaning to derail but you did ask for sub opinions! (Personally I enjoy a cane or a belt for "funishment" 😁).

[Algolagnic]

As my ex was a masochist so implements and punishment did not appear in the same discussion to her punishment would have been clothed, in extreme bondage watching me give another female a sound thrashing. Play would have been another story, first you need an array of implements a pack of cards with jokers and two dice, first of all she throws one of the dice if it’s an odd number we use just one of the dice and if it is even both of them, she then throws the afore decided number of dice once and that gives us the number of implements to be used she then chooses her first one before taking a card from the pack to determine the number of strikes she takes with it number cards at face value, Jack is 11, Queen is 12 and King is 13 but if she gets a joker I choose the implement and throw both dice for the number of strokes, this is repeated until she has the predetermined number of items and the number of strikes for each then the fun begins. It’s up to her to take them all and it’s up to me to moderate the strokes to make sure she can

[Deleted Member]

3 hours ago, Curvykate said:

Ignoring her isn't good, but you think telling a woman to wash her mouth out with soap is ok?

Yes of course 😅

that was an example but I did ask to a bratty mouthy sub. She didn’t say the word after that punishment. 
 

as you say what work for some might not be your type of dynamic! 

[Deleted Member]

47 minutes ago, MsDrawers said:

Exactly! That was really what I was driving at. If it works for everyone, have at it, but there's no right way or only way to do anything (assuming all the usuals). 

[Deleted Member]

13 minutes ago, FabSeverus said:

Yes of course 😅

that was an example but I did ask to a bratty mouthy sub. She didn’t say the word after that punishment. 
 

as you say what work for some might not be your type of dynamic! 

It sounds abusive to me. Not just "not my dynamic" 🤷🏻‍♀️

[IneffableGent]

It varies according to why they’re in need of punishment. Only doing something that they tolerate but don’t like for severe lapses in discipline. As I’m sure that you’ve found masochistic sub’s normally prefer something to be either stinging or heavy and thuddy in nature, so use what they don’t enjoy.

[Deleted Member]

1 minute ago, Curvykate said:

It sounds abusive to me. Not just "not my dynamic" 🤷🏻‍♀️

Let’s say many would state impact play are a form of *** too… 

[Pa****]

Whatever the punishment looks like, there needs to be a conversation beforehand about individual limits. These should always be respected and there should always be some form of aftercare, even for the non-physical stuff. As far as physical punishment goes, ramping it up with constant checking would be best - also, the *** used must always be reasonable, not just because you should care that your partner comes to no harm, but because the courts have established this - even if you partner consents - you must not use excessive ***. Not sure how a judge decides what is excessive though...!!!

I also agree with the comment about
reward. There needs to be a balance , so that the relationship is healthy. If not there is a real risk of the relationship being an abusive one.

[Deleted Member]

15 minutes ago, FabSeverus said:

Let’s say many would state impact play are a form of *** too… 

That is discussed and negotiated. Not the same thing.

[Deleted Member]

26 minutes ago, Curvykate said:

It sounds abusive to me. Not just "not my dynamic" 🤷🏻‍♀️

Let’s say many would state impact play are a form of *** too… 

[Deleted Member]

As with anything it's different folks, different strokes. Each and every relationship/dynamic can be anything the two agree on. For some punishment is part and parcel, for some not. For some it's an essential part of play, and if agreed within the negotiation phase then cool, but it's not something the D can Introduce Willy nilly when they choose at random, as that then breaks pre agreed boundaries, and thereby limits. For me it's not something I need or want within a relationship/dynamic. If a submissive chooses to misbehave I would much rather talk it through, to try and understand why she would feel that need.

[Deleted Member]

48 minutes ago, Curvykate said:

That is discussed and negotiated. Not the same thing.

So are the rules and punishment if broken! 
not sure where you are going with this? As if I am the type of abusing a sub?? 
I put everything in writing from the day the sub want to try her submission with me. 
i am the kind of Dom who talk about any possibilities like if it’s part of the health and safety program. 
 

so all the punishments are already in place for the sub to test if she wanted to…. 

i am off this post as it’s sound like a slippery slope… especially if the *** word is used. 

[Deleted Member]

57 minutes ago, FabSeverus said:

So are the rules and punishment if broken! 
not sure where you are going with this? As if I am the type of abusing a sub?? 
I put everything in writing from the day the sub want to try her submission with me. 
i am the kind of Dom who talk about any possibilities like if it’s part of the health and safety program. 
 

so all the punishments are already in place for the sub to test if she wanted to…. 

i am off this post as it’s sound like a slippery slope… especially if the *** word is used. 

I call it how I see it. And in my experience, no, punishments are not discussed and negotiated.