Reverse bondage

[Fen]

I'd definitely call myself a switch, but I usually lean sub. I think that's mostly because the kinds of things I like are often in the sub/bottom role. But what I like also tends to be a little... narrow. A lot of things I've fantasized about I find less enjoyable than I expect, while the dom/mes I've interracted with have wanted things that turned me off. So I want to try flipping the script. Taking the dominant role on the weaker side of things, namely bondage. Ordering a sub to tie me up and tease me, and more from there.  I was wondering if anyone else has any experience with it?  Does it work? Is it weird? Would anyone be open to this?

[Cheekysub247]

Morning, ive experienced similar in the sense ive had a switch(but meant to be dom while with me) try to get me to domme them (im completely sub), personally it felt completely wrong and made the situation very uncomfortable. Everyone is different and some subs might be ok with it, i wonder if a sub with switch tendencies might be a good match. 😊

[Cu****]

Does the fact that the dom/mes you've interacted with also being narrow and wanted things that turned you off, suggest that not enough talking went on in the first place? There's another thread here today, talking from the female perspective, suggesting that doms don't ask what a sub is looking for, but the dom presumes that he knows what's best...and clearly assumes, beyond belief.
Conversation, long and deep and over a period of time, helps to weed out the issues that perhaps you've found in the past. A sub knows her desires, needs and fantasies. A dom should enable these interests and thoughts to become reality, otherwise why bother to pursue an eventual meet? If the dom doesn't meet your needs, then they're connecting under false pretences and subsequently springing their own agenda, after the supposed connection has been made. Desperation, seems to have crept in. Take time, to get to know people. Don't be afraid to tell dom/mes at an early stage that they're not what you're looking for. A sub chooses her most appropriate dom/me for a very good reason; her own satisfaction.

[ey****]

it's important in this scenario that the sub would be ok with this

there are some subs who, while, enjoy following what they're asked to please their Dominant - they also don't like the idea of doing things they consider Dominant, it messes with their headspace

while someone who is switch or Dominant might feel it was topping from the bottom if there's too much directing

that's not ot say it's all not possible - but  - again, being important on communication

[Fen]

3 hours ago, CumbriaLeather said:

Does the fact that the dom/mes you've interacted with also being narrow and wanted things that turned you off, suggest that not enough talking went on in the first place? There's another thread here today, talking from the female perspective, suggesting that doms don't ask what a sub is looking for, but the dom presumes that he knows what's best...and clearly assumes, beyond belief.
Conversation, long and deep and over a period of time, helps to weed out the issues that perhaps you've found in the past. A sub knows her desires, needs and fantasies. A dom should enable these interests and thoughts to become reality, otherwise why bother to pursue an eventual meet? If the dom doesn't meet your needs, then they're connecting under false pretences and subsequently springing their own agenda, after the supposed connection has been made. Desperation, seems to have crept in. Take time, to get to know people. Don't be afraid to tell dom/mes at an early stage that they're not what you're looking for. A sub chooses her most appropriate dom/me for a very good reason; her own satisfaction.

I didn't say the Dom/mes are narrow, but I've found that my likes are. Things I thought I'd like because they fall under a broad umbrella of my turn-ons that just... don't do it. I love fantasizing about them, but reality isn't as fun. I use "dom/mes" because they've primarily been men, but I'm not attracted to men. In my head the idea of being pushed out of my comfort zone is hot. When it actually happens, it just tends to be bleh. You seem to assume I've done meet-ups, but I haven't. A big core of my sexual identity is control-focused, it translates well through internet media. Even in that stage, whatever luster it feels like it has wipes off quickly.

 

I'd also like to point out that this desire isn't because I don't feel my needs are being met as a sub. I enjoy being tied up and touched. I realized that although that's usually on the sub's side, there's no reason it couldn't be flipped, and that's something I'd be interested in. It's not desperation about trying to find the right domme, it's something I want to try.

[Fen]

1 hour ago, eyemblacksheep said:

it's important in this scenario that the sub would be ok with this

there are some subs who, while, enjoy following what they're asked to please their Dominant - they also don't like the idea of doing things they consider Dominant, it messes with their headspace

while someone who is switch or Dominant might feel it was topping from the bottom if there's too much directing

that's not ot say it's all not possible - but  - again, being important on communication

Absolutely, I know the importance of communication. And it definitely wouldn't be a switch situation. Bondage is a form of control, but so are verbal orders. I'd be looking to use the latter as meta-control over the former. Which I get that not all subs would be into, but I think I would like.

[Deleted Member]

If I was asked to do this by my Dom I'd be perfectly happy with it. In fact, I'd really enjoy the chance to turn the tables, and I love rope so I'd be delighted to have a victim, I mean willing partner to practice on rather than just myself. Probably not for everyone, but I'd be perfectly willing to service top in this way so long as I wasn't being asked to do something I wasnt comfortable with, like CBT.

[Sc****]

Your my dream I've tried the dominant side but want to move overr to the sub side of things I now consider my role Switchmore of