Origin of your kink?

[Deleted Member]

I think I was born kinky. My earliest n associated memory if any awareness was, when I was watching Tarzan on TV when I was small. They was a scene where cannibals were carrying their victim on s pole... I remember warning  to be the 'victim'. 

[Na****]

Well I grew up in the countryside…so I often walked by freshly fertilized fields and just the akwardness of my crush(or people I thought where cute) when walking with them right next to a field smelling like manure just turned me on somehow

[Deleted Member]

Leather sofa lol

[Deleted Member]

I have a praise kink, from what I gained from researching and self reflection, it stems from not having confidence in myself and needing external reward or reassurance. Now is the kink bad itself because of where it comes from? From my perspective it’s not something that hinders me within the concept of sex and even enhances the experience for me, it is serving me in a positive way by aiding in pleasure and I refuse to feel bad about it! If it helps me process and reuse my insecurities in a positive light then is it really all that bad?
Not in my book.

[me****]

I have a praise kink also being bound. I can say the praise link is from not having enough self confidence and needing outside reassurance yet still learning this obsession I have with being bound my sense of control n movement taken away from me does something to me where did it come from not a clue

[Ch****]

Everyone is different, so I can only speak for myself. I am a male submissive, and some of my kinks go pretty extreme into punishments and ***, but I NEVER experienced this as a child. No dominant mother, aunt, teacher, or babysitter made me this way! I truly feel it was hardwired into me from birth. I didn’t have my first actual experience in person until my mid 20s.

[Mosquitor]

In the American sexologist Jesse Bering's book 'Perv' he talks about what psychologists call the 'Zeigarnik Effect'. In general psychology it refers to the way we habitually remember the information from unfinished tasks better than we do finished ones, but in terms of sexuality it is thought that when a child experiences a situation they fail to understand, or are perhaps disturbed by- which often may involve witnessing some kind of sex act or their sexual urges being awakened in another sense - their lack of understanding results in a fetish developing as they try to 'resolve' and make sense of the experience. Apparently this experience is most common in Autistic *** or those with particularly inquisitive minds. I don't know if it's applicable in all cases but this definitely makes sense with me; my fetish developed after I saw something on TV I didn't understand that disturbed me, and I am Autistic as well, so I think this explanation is applicable in my case.

[Deleted Member]

I got started when I was really young and a family friend took me under his wing when I was in a really dark place. He started me out with cross dressing and I took to it immediately and we went from there into many many others for the four years we were able to be together.

[Dancingbear225]

I have thought about this a lot. My main kink is probably rope bondage. I think this centers from the images that were commonly available to me when I was becoming sexualized. My mother loved True Detective magazines. And all of the images in the magazines were of scantily dressed women tied up with rope. I have always been Dominant in my life, I don't know if that is genetic or environmental, but I have always gravitated to being in charge.

[at****]

I didn’t have any sort of major traumas or negative experiences growing up. I can remember being really fascinated by Penelope Pitstop who would constantly get tied up in perilous situations, and I even remember putting on my mom’s heels and laying down and pretending I was her tied up on train tracks. I think that’s where it started for me.

[Dancingbear225]

For me it was "The Perils of Pauline". And Golden Age "Wonder Woman", always seemed to be getting tied up.

[Granted]

On the contrary to your thoughts, I have had no trauma that helped swerve me toward being dominant. A friend at University introduced me to what she and her husband did through conversation and jest and the concept of subs giving up control to their doms was intriguing to say the least. 
 

So there may well be cases where people have assumed a dom or sub role due to circumstance, but I don't feel it is fair to suggest it is purely as a result of a negative experience. 
 

I know that it is very common for those who by day are in a position of power, have a higher chance of being submissive in the bedroom sense as they find it refreshing to hand that control over to somebody else. 
 

You are right though, it is an interesting topic trying to understand why people choose the path they do. Good topic

[el****]

Definitely Michelle Pfeiffer (Catwoman, Batman Returns) & Kate Beckinsale (Selene, Underworld) for PVC fetish. Famke Janssen (Xenia Onatopp, Goldeneye) for stockings, lingerie and bdsm - if you've seen the film, you'll know the scenes I mean 😜 - although I've always had a thing for tights/stockings/fishnets for as long as I can remember. Thigh high socks after seeing girl I crushed on wearing them out on the back one summer, with very short shorts & a footie top 😄

[el****]

Got hooked on anal after seeing it in a porno lol. One of my Uni friends was talking about it, so I searched it when I got back to my room. She later caught me after bursting into my room unannounced - I never moved so fast 🤣
She then sat trawling my history to see what I'd been watching.
"Didn't think you were into Anal" she said, "I was just curious" I replied.... "yeah, looks like it, nothing but anal here!"
Unfortunately nothing happened though as she wasn't into guys.

[Deleted Member]

No trauma that I can identify. I am a submissive, and I am happy being that. But as to why I am what I am I don’t know (unlike Popeye). I did discover that I liked being a submissive by accident, answering an ad online many moons ago. But once I found out what I was as well as a lifestyle being out there I could not turn back. I have tried being dominant and being a switch, but those just don’t do anything for me.

[DD****]

I was ***d for 6 years by hundreds of men as a young man. When I became an adult I decided to go find out what I actually liked and how to always control the situation with safe words and understanding. I'm to the extreme on both ends and it helps with memory replacement

[Deleted Member]

Hmm, I’ve never thought about this like that. All I’ve ever really thought was it was kind of strange to have a kink that resembles bad situations from the past. But as I’ve got older I’ve also gotten into things I normally thought were strange but now they’re not so much. So for me I’d say it has a little bit to do with everything.

[Zg****]

Saw lots of girls feet when I was in high school. Been a foot fetish guy ever since

[sW****]

Looking back, I always enjoyed watching women being captured. From Rocky and Bullwinkle to old Westerns. I didn't understand at first, and I thought I was damaged somehow. In my 20s I made a friend who could see my reactions to serial killer shows, etc., and he helped me understand that it was actually pretty common and nothing to be ashamed about. Many people have "dark fantasies" but we are socially conditioned to push those deep into our psyches. If we were more aware and accepting, therr would probably be less ***...as those desires could be met consensually and safely.

[Deleted Member]

Lord, bless my first male GYN! I never felt more ***, humiliated, and alive when I was put up in stirrups and had a man violate me taking my choice away

[Mosquitor]

On 6/25/2022 at 7:42 PM, sWitchHazel said:

Looking back, I always enjoyed watching women being captured. From Rocky and Bullwinkle to old Westerns. I didn't understand at first, and I thought I was damaged somehow. In my 20s I made a friend who could see my reactions to serial killer shows, etc., and he helped me understand that it was actually pretty common and nothing to be ashamed about. Many people have "dark fantasies" but we are socially conditioned to push those deep into our psyches. If we were more aware and accepting, therr would probably be less ***...as those desires could be met consensually and safely.

I had the same thing. Watching shows like He-Man as a kid I always used to secretly like it when the female characters got captured, and would tune in hoping Teela or The Sorceress would get captured. It started with a kind of distress at seeing a strong woman in a position of danger, which somehow turned mentally into what I would later understand was sexual excitement. Likewise I felt bad about this when I was older and thought there was something wrong with me, but as it turns out this is actually very common and I've only recently realized just how common it actually is.

[Ma****]

Guess my kink started as child or *** not shore but was before 18 I did

[Deleted Member]

I had a friend 10 years older than me. She is one of the most brilliant person I ever got in touch. She was into pegging and bdsm. I turned out a dom.

[Deleted Member]

My shirt and tie thing started of as a young kid. I actually didn't like wearing a shirt and tie uniform and felt embarrassed about it and did not like others seeing me wear it for some reason. This was also strangely contrasted by liking wearing it to the point of wanting to keep it on for as long as I could at night, wearing it in bed and masturbating in it around my early ***s onwards.

As for ladies wearing a shirt and tie, that just always turned me on from the same early age.

[Deleted Member]

As a ***, I was always turned on after getting in a argument with a guy... I'm now realizing I'm a Brat