Pe**** Posted December 1, 2021 Author Posted December 1, 2021 16 hours ago, Feral_MountianKing said: I think that, unfortunately, with the development of apps that seem to uphold values of quick meets, swipe life, always find someone else available for your kink or you to date, we will always now have an impatient population that is not concerned with building relationships of trust. Once you’ve experienced a dynamic relationship where that trust was earned line by line, step by step. And you both are very committed and communication comes easy, you won’t want the easy.. Here’s a secret, anyone can slap an ass, *** a throat.. But do you understand the trade off, the balance of power, the equality of it all. It’s not just about being the man. (Or woman) it’s about all of it, the after care, the beginning, all of it. AMEN 👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻
Seeknwifencucks Posted April 19, 2022 Posted April 19, 2022 You can blame 50 shades of crap for that also the throw away society’s that have an attention span of a knat some of us have had mentors on both sides of the slash for years
Deleted Member Posted August 23, 2022 Posted August 23, 2022 Thank 50 shade of shit & the following pop culture trend for that. Domination is all about the sub, not the dom. I find new "dom" wannabees are just ***rs in essence, plain & simple. Some dont even understand the safe sane conscentual concept. Or maybe im just an old school type of dom? Still it irritates me looking at how those "dom" men act.
Th**** Posted August 23, 2022 Posted August 23, 2022 Traditions have always varied over time, and there has always been the casual scene and the D/s dynamic. Personally I can't be bothered wasting my time on anything less than a fully committed D/s dynamic and they are not easy to find with the right chemistry and all the other elements. It may be worth pointing out though that fake Doms were manipulating subs with phrases like "If you were submissive enough you would....." and generally taking liberties when I first came into the lifestyle. That was coming on for 30 years ago. As the numbers coming in to the lifestyle goes up the percentage with good training goes down. So be very picky, remember you are only worth the best and when someone is an asshat be glad you saw their true colours now and not later.
ey**** Posted August 23, 2022 Posted August 23, 2022 I feel people get overly obsessed about 50 Shades. it's a fiction book/film which has a mixture of loose research from the fetish scene and the authors own ideas. But everything else, Gor, Circle of O, so on, were all authors own ideologies yet make up a lot of the backbone of kink. It's like we read something in a book "ooh, that sounds hot let's do it" but it's not actually based on much. Most "traditions" were decided in the 90s. And there's nothing wrong with saying "yes, that is how I want to live my relationship/dynamic" but people talk like they are ancient rituals passed down hundreds of years, and not something some sci-fi fan suggested in a burger bar in the 90s.
sm**** Posted August 23, 2022 Posted August 23, 2022 50 shades has a lot to answer for for the influx of wannabes but as has been answered a lot of kink areas have been influenced by Books, Gor the main example. There has always been a section of full on D/s, 24/7 TPE and the casuals into some form of kink. But as kink becomes more in vogue to mainstream media i.e best seller books and film spin offs it has brought in an increasing number of the "users" who think anyone is game and easy, with a smatering of genuine who have had that "Eureka" moment and feel like it's time to explore and find their niche in the scene. The increasing influx has brought about the Instant Gratification element and the toys out of prams when they don't get what they want. There seems less emphasis on the time taken in the past to learn, explore and that all important communication, which always leads to dramas. Time taken to get to know people and not just the person your intending to play with which in the past used to be traditionally a role of some sort of mentor or trusted pillar of the local scene community. Though this still happens it's less and less common as older hands start to shy away from the public theatre of the scene.
sm**** Posted June 29, 2023 Posted June 29, 2023 Here’s my question then: if you want doms to follow this “tradition”. Then everyone should follow it subs included. Because now subs act way different then they used to when these “traditions” were made. Things are evolving in the world if you don’t evolve with it you get left behind. (Also not trying to be mean just sayin)
Pe**** Posted July 3, 2023 Author Posted July 3, 2023 Thursday at 11:55 AM, bigsadboy said: Here’s my question then: if you want doms to follow this “tradition”. Then everyone should follow it subs included. Because now subs act way different then they used to when these “traditions” were made. Things are evolving in the world if you don’t evolve with it you get left behind. (Also not trying to be mean just sayin) I won’t be getting left behind for demanding respect and not being spoke to like a piece of meat.
Deleted Member Posted July 3, 2023 Posted July 3, 2023 On 10/8/2021 at 5:58 AM, Invisible71 said: ... Given half a chance I'd like to try to learn how to be a Dom in a D/S relationship. But as a newbie I need help in learning the dynamics and any sub I've tried to start a chat with is not interested in helping me to learn. So basically I'm left out on the edges of the community without a way to find out if a D/S scenario is truely for me and whoever may be the sub. I think it might be better to chat to experiences Dom's rather than subs. Ask about their experience and journey. Maybe go to some local munch meets, do a bit of research online, look for workshops either f2f or online. When I wanted to learn what it meant to be a sub I chatted to lots and lots of experienced subs as well as Doms without any expectations of meeting. I found people were willing to help as long as I made it clear I was asking for advice only.
sm**** Posted July 3, 2023 Posted July 3, 2023 5 hours ago, PervyPenelope said: I won’t be getting left behind for demanding respect and not being spoke to like a piece of meat. I agree. And I don’t think you should be spoken to as such. Doms need to earn respect and trust from their sub. You don’t deserve it just cuz your a dom. But not accepting anything is being close minded. Your just restricting yourself.
Pe**** Posted July 5, 2023 Author Posted July 5, 2023 On 7/3/2023 at 6:31 PM, bigsadboy said: I agree. And I don’t think you should be spoken to as such. Doms need to earn respect and trust from their sub. You don’t deserve it just cuz your a dom. But not accepting anything is being close minded. Your just restricting yourself. Sorry, but I won’t accept being spoken to as a kink dispenser or a piece of s**t and that’s what the original post is about. No one deserves it at all. Im not sure what you’re going on about “not accepting anything”
sm**** Posted July 6, 2023 Posted July 6, 2023 Yesterday at 06:38 AM, PervyPenelope said: Sorry, but I won’t accept being spoken to as a kink dispenser or a piece of s**t and that’s what the original post is about. No one deserves it at all. Im not sure what you’re going on about “not accepting anything” Again I’m not saying you are. But when new traditions come along and start making waves and everyone’s mad cuz it’s not like it used to. Your just limiting yourself. And again you don’t deserve respect you earn it from trust between a dom and sub. I’m not calling you a POS or kink whatever your miss interpreting my statement it’s not against you.
ey**** Posted July 6, 2023 Posted July 6, 2023 On 6/29/2023 at 12:55 PM, bigsadboy said: Here’s my question then: if you want doms to follow this “tradition”. Then everyone should follow it subs included. Because now subs act way different then they used to when these “traditions” were made. Things are evolving in the world if you don’t evolve with it you get left behind. (Also not trying to be mean just sayin) it's true that times evolve but if subs are acting like d**kheads, it's not the Dommes being left behind
Pe**** Posted July 9, 2023 Author Posted July 9, 2023 Thursday at 01:47 PM, bigsadboy said: Again I’m not saying you are. But when new traditions come along and start making waves and everyone’s mad cuz it’s not like it used to. Your just limiting yourself. And again you don’t deserve respect you earn it from trust between a dom and sub. I’m not calling you a POS or kink whatever your miss interpreting my statement it’s not against you. I’m talking about the traditions of respect, consent etc. that shouldn’t ever change. This is what the original post is about. What don’t you get about that????? I’m not limiting myself at all if someone messages me “get on your knees” or “open your legs for daddy” and I’ve never even spoken to them before let alone got to know them for months and form a dynamic. Please read the post before commenting 🙄🙄
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