Tips for online play

[Deleted Member]

I am curious about online play as a dominant as its something I've never got into but in this age of COVID-19 and the reluctance of some people to still meet for face-to-face play its something I'm considering doing.

Could anyone give me their perspective of how it works for them, what they do such doing a scene on a video call or by text, etc

[Deleted Member]

Once you find the right person, this is key to enjoying an almost full D/s relationship on line. It’s very hard for someone to actually be able to discipline their selves as we would want to, but it’s not impossible. A lot of talking, building trust and not being a sleeve is also vital. You literally ask them to perform your tasks that you yourself would perform if it were f2f. What’s not to enjoy? It can be very intense, exciting but also very exhausting for both to maintain. So worth it though if you connect. Try it. Just remember you have to build more.

[ey****]

I think a first step might be to think - in an ideal world - how would you like the online play to work for you?

What do you think you can get behind?  Because text based role play or any form of cam to cam or setting tasks and waiting for results... these are all quite different and all or none of them could be involved.

Remember of course that boundaries are still very important - not just in what you do - but - the downside of online is sometimes it can feel "always available" and messages can appear to be read, whilst, the person wasn't "available" to reply.  

[Splak]

I am quite new to this...with that being said, I have a new online sub that wants and is willing to be the dirtiest boy ever! Without knowing him personally or f2f, I'm finding it hard to come up with dirty instructions/commands. Any help and suggestions is greatly appreciated. 

[ol****]

On 2/22/2022 at 1:23 PM, Splak said:

I am quite new to this...with that being said, I have a new online sub that wants and is willing to be the dirtiest boy ever! Without knowing him personally or f2f, I'm finding it hard to come up with dirty instructions/commands. Any help and suggestions is greatly appreciated. 

I'll offer an insight.

This needs a lot of work on your part, maybe more than if you do meet f2f.

You need to dream up and write out the scenario and the background against which the scene will take place.

You need to figure out what substitues for how you'd do something irl.

You need to get the visuals right if that's a key aspect of your online play. Some people can see it all in their minds eye, others can't so you might need picture and video or even live video.

hope that helps a bit.

 

[ge****]

Yesterday at 01:23 PM, Splak said:

I am quite new to this...with that being said, I have a new online sub that wants and is willing to be the dirtiest boy ever! Without knowing him personally or f2f, I'm finding it hard to come up with dirty instructions/commands. Any help and suggestions is greatly appreciated. 

Perhaps the place to start is as you would regardless of whether it was face to face or on-line - by taking a step back and getting to know him a little, finding out what his limits and boundaries are, and what his personal view of BDSM and submission is - checking it's aligned with your own views.
.
There are many many flavours of submission each as individual as the submissive - so until you understand what flavour he is, you can't possibly know where to start.
.
Maybe get him to complete an on-line questionnaire that details various BDSM related acts and has you rate them in terms of interest - that would give you and insight into how his mind ticks and how you can progress from there.
.
Taking that step back will also allow you to see how interested he actually is in his submission vs just getting off on dirty talk - often those willing to be the "dirtiest boy ever" are just looking for cheap thrills.