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A Budding FemDom With Many Questions


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Posted

So..I've been interested in the whole FemDom scene for a while now. I have so many fantasies of dominating submissive men. But..I'm not sure where to start? I've flirted with plenty of guys who seem to be interested when I flirt with them but..I never go through with hooking up. I usually never do because I'm scared I won't be able to meet their needs as I have never been a dom before in my life. I'm scared I'll end up messing something up and they won't be as satisfied as they wanted to be. I want to pleasure them and myself.  So I'm going to list many questions and I hope I can get some answers!
[feel free to answer as many or as little questions as you'd like!]
To the FemDoms:
-How do you usually start the foreplay for dominating?
-What are the boundaries you set and how do you engage in them?
-Did you have to teach yourself how to tie many knots and improvise with different things in order to tie your subs?
-As a dom, what do you find that most subs enjoy?
-How did you find your first sub partner, and how did it go?
-Have you ever been in a cuckold situation where your sub was fucked by another, and how was that for you and him?
-Are you a femdom that would be willing to become my mentor? [Lives in LA area preferably. As weird as it sounds, maybe I could be an audience and watch you do your thing to take some mental notes?]
-What is the farthest and most dominating thing you have done to your partner, and did they enjoy it?

To the MenSubs:
-What do you usually enjoy in a female dom?
-Have you ever been in a cuckold situation where your mistress would watch, and how was that for you and her?
-If engaged in penetration, how do you like your dom to foreplay and do the penetration?
-Are you open about how you like to be dominated?
-Typically would you prefer your mistress to already be experienced and know everything she is doing, or do you not mind telling her how to engage?
-What is the most dominating thing a mistress has done to you, and did you enjoy it?

These are the current questions I have- if I have any more please let me know if you would be open in letting me ask more questions in the future!!

Posted
When I was a Domme I just naturally felt like that was the role for me so my imagination ran wild. Nowadays we’re very lucky as we have the internet which is a great tool. You need to study & read as much as you can on this. I gained a lot of experience by going to Fetish Clubs, meeting people, learning about different kinks & needs. then when I was a bit older I was lucky enough to work along side a TV Domme in a club as my mentor. Now I am a sub the main thing I look for in a Dom is confidence. They don’t have to be overly experienced as long as they’re confident enough to control me. What you need to remember is we’re all very different. You can’t judge your subs on what any of us have encountered or any of our limits. You set your boundaries very clearly to each other before you start by talking. Communication is very important & you make sure you are both clear on the safe word or safe sign. Your needs are just as important so a sub might want you to ballcrush him for example but you may not feel safe or comfortable to do so so make sure your limits are clear too. If you’re playing with extreme limits then make sure you get trained or have the correct knowledge so that you don’t cause more damaged than is necessary. And ALWAYS make sure you know what aftercare is required be it medical, creams or nurturing. Remeber BDSM isn’t always about sex. The thrill, the play & the controlled situation is just as important. The most important thing in any bdsm situation is ‘communication’
Posted
Start with me. (Waves hand...) Sorry that wasn't the most enaging answer.... 😀
Posted
Quote

What do you usually enjoy in a female dom?

there are different characteristics in different people.  I do like someone who I deem attractive but not necessarily who I am attracted to.   Some of the things that do perk me are her enthusiasm and knowledge about BDSM.

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Have you ever been in a cuckold situation where your mistress would watch, and how was that for you and her?

I'm not sure why my Mistress would be watching if it was a cuckold situation.  I think you're misunderstanding here.

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If engaged in penetration, how do you like your dom to foreplay and do the penetration?

 

She is the Dominant - sooo

I've never done PiV with a Mistress - and whilst this may or may not happen in the future it is merely at the call of the Dominant - they are the ones in charge.  There's a lot of wibbly lines about sex in BDSM but this doesn't have to be something you do.

I have, however, done strap-on and in those instances it's generally most important that I'm relaxed and ready.  It's rarely the first thing done - perhaps following some foot worship or body worship.  

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Are you open about how you like to be dominated?


I have an interest list that lists many fetishes and activities by how much I enjoy them.    It's not exhaustive.  This should create an idea for the Dominant on where our interests overlap.  To tell Her how I would like to be Dominated is topping from the bottom and then becomes more about MY wants than HERS and She is the Dominant.  I want Her to Dominate me in Her style.

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Typically would you prefer your mistress to already be experienced and know everything she is doing, or do you not mind telling her how to engage?

I prefer Her to be honest.  I have helped with the training of Mistresses, effectively used as a bit of a dummy whilst someone mentors another, I am happy to share my own knowledge to help out.  

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What is the most dominating thing a mistress has done to you, and did you enjoy it?


Possibly a lot to list.  But, maybe my first time with a single tail.   I'd already done a warm up - and some caning, 62 strokes - if we say on intensity out of 10, it probably started a 3 or 4 and finished around a 7 or 8.   She then rewarded me with some foot worship, before cuffing me to a suspension rod and lashing me with a single tail.  

There's a story in the stories forum about part of this, called 'and breath' - but I was basically dangling from this rod, pretty limp and She would come around to check on me - have me open my mouth and then slowly ooze spit in. Before harking 'again' - and lashing me again.

When She unclipped me I was shaking like mad......

  • 3 weeks later...
Posted
Start from what your "secure and confident" core, ie. that you know that if you set your mind to it, you can always learnt and be better. I'm sure it took you a few months to even learn to walk, and now, look at you :-) my old uni professor told me "your first job won't be your last, you'll probably be kicked out of it but you'll learn how to do better the second time". In general, just .. to not focus on any specific script or anything, just make sure the person you play with understands that you have a strong will to explore, and are gettign there. And that s/he will be your guinea pig :-) if that doesn't get him/her horny, probably s/he is just lookign at you as some means to get off himself .... more into his/her own pleasure than you. my 2c.
  • 2 weeks later...
Posted

I had a dom shit on me and *** on me and made me rub it all over and on my dick. She had me use it as lube to masterbate while I licked the shit from her ass. I loved it. If you are a sub you have limits but for me not many. I have been penetrated and loved it

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