Why assume about MTF trans

[JazmineLatishaJones]

Why does everyone assume that all MTF transexuals are submissive? 

The truth is, much like everybody else, we tend to swing back and forth between both roles ( who's holding the dildo.) depending on whom  we choose as a partner. 

 

Edited March 4, 2022 by DawnMarrie1961
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[Deleted Member]

I for one would never make such an assumption, maybe that is in part due to my own compliant nature. Everyone is different and that just heightens the voyage of discovery.

[Gimpetta]

Mostly because of the false equivalence bugots place on transgender people and sissies (which tends to be a *** thing)

[Emsw12]

Personal experiences vary, but I understand the frustration. I had the opposite on other sites where, specifically guys, assumed I'd dominate them. I think people need to just stop making assumptions as best they can and put some effort into learning the person they're talking to.

[Deleted Member]

That’s what communication is all about. Understanding the person you’re talking to. Some guys just don’t know what that means.

[Deleted Member]

Unfortunately some people still think feminine means submissive and masculine means dominant. Speaking as a cis Domme woman I've noticed this in the kink and the vanilla world. Thankfully anyone actually worth your time will not assume this. 😊

[Ky****]

it is wrong to assume and I do know some mtf who are Dommes, however, it does seem a lot more common for us to be subs, possibly because the influences to which we are subject while growing up male all lead to the assumption that feminine is passive/submissive

and I agree that there is also the correlation between mtf and sissy that is often made

i also think its the way we often find our identity, male sub to xd, ***d?, to sissy to road to Damascus er no I'm a woman, perhaps when society is more open about us and we can explore our mental identity more openly this pathway will become less common and the mtf=sub link will be broken, lets face it at present we've a hell of a fight to break the link in society that mtf trans is a kink, its not just that's how many of us find our true identity

[Mavrick]

It’s a man thing. Not that it’s right but it is a fact. My self I do not assume anything. Because when you assume anything you make an ass out of u and me. And I agree that’s why free open honest communications, is so very vital and of such, importance especially in the kink bdsm Fetish world. And it’s the same in the vanilla world as well. And only all of us. Men, women, couples, transsexuals, non binary, vanilla, bdsm, kink, fetish, can change that long out date notion that men because of their birth are automatically dominant and women automatically submissive. My opinion but there it is.

[ol****]

I wrote on another post the other day, talk, talk and more talk.

You know what they say about the work assume .

[Mavrick]

Absolutely and communications must stay current and healthy

[ey****]

I think a mixture of

- the assumption women are submissive

- the confusion between a trans woman and a sissy (two very different things, obviously - but some dumbasses don't know this)

- that a lot of porn shows trans women in a submissive role (and/or some form of horrific objectification)

[Mavrick]

I don’t disagree at all. Anything that sells is how they will portray it whether it’s accurate or not

[Deleted Member]

Why get hurt feelings over nothing? Lol

[Ky****]

speaking as a sub mtf it would be interesting to know what the breakdown is, is it true that we have higher % of sub than other groups? also wonder if this changes between pre and post op

still not good to assume, but would be interesting

[Mavrick]

Actually I truly would be interesting to see the actual numbers and collate the data from there

[ey****]

Like a lot of stuff kink wise it's very difficult to collate numbers 

In this case though you would not only need people who are out as kinky, but out as being trans 

Add in; there's actually very little obligation for someone who is, say, trans female to signify they are trans.   

There's also a lot which can change on openness depending on territory.  

 

[Mavrick]

Absolutely and all that must be figured when you collate the data. You always have a real number that can swing either way, depending on the factors in the data collection. Not an easy task by no means. But it would be interesting. And I know about not coming out about being kinky. 30 something years ago all of us that practiced this lifestyle for real we’re considered abnormal sexual diviants