Master/slave

[no****]

So me and my sub have decided to go to Master/slave relationship in all areas.
Any tips advice or experiences anyone want to share

[Deleted Member]

Communication on what you all are comfortable with.

[Lord_Talion]

Make sure EVERYTHING you can think of concerning YOUR dynamic is understood. Or write up an M/s contract that may be revised with mutual consent

[DeviantInside]

!00% agree with DomPhD, communication is vital, like pretty mch everything else. On what your individual understanding and expectations are. What changes will it entail. How will it work around your general lives. What is acceptable and what is off limits.

[Deleted Member]

Set boundries and learn each other enough to when and where those boundries must be set.

[mc****]

Communication, safe words and lots of patience 😉. You might want to start slowly and “dip your toes” at the beginning, so to speak. Enjoy!

[ey****]

seek advice and learn what you want to implement BEFORE introducing a dynamic 

[No****]

I’m still trying to learn the difference between D/s and M/s🤷‍♂️

[ge****]

Firstly it's no different from any other relationship at its very basic level so things you'd apply in a "normal" relationship apply here too - yes it may be bounded by other things but specific to the dynamic but all the core values of trust, honesty, respect, open communication etc still apply.
.
With regards to the specific dynamic that's very much up to both of you to agree what you are *both* comfortable with but boundaries and limits are key, setting up a set of rules that guide the relationship play a part too - but ultimately it has to be about what you both want and agree to - and as such needs to come from you both.

[IW****]

This is one of the things that confuses me. I keep getting different stories on this. I’ve been told that subs and slaves, are the same thing. Also Doms/Dommes and Master/Mistress etc are the same things. Then I’m told they’re not. The reading I’ve done all seems to be different peoples perspectives.

[ey****]

4 hours ago, HerNewToy said:

This is one of the things that confuses me. I keep getting different stories on this. I’ve been told that subs and slaves, are the same thing. Also Doms/Dommes and Master/Mistress etc are the same things. Then I’m told they’re not. The reading I’ve done all seems to be different peoples perspectives.

So - here is the truth

They are largely the same thing.   People will argue the toss about this, but there's a lot where there is more of a fantasy element.

Usually people will dictate that the difference between a submissive and a slave is that the submissive has limits, a safe word, a right to say no - so on - but a slave does not.

Some people will differentiate that a slave is in an almost permanent CNC arrangement.   They do what they're told, when they're told, no complaints no question.  No limits.

Except...

Everyone has limits.  Be it how much they can physically carry. Their stamina. Their strength.  Anything medical that prevents one thing or another.  So you always have to work with someones capabilities.

I guess if I was someone's sub and she said "let's do hardsports" and I said "that isn't something I do" she could accept that and not do that. But if this is something REALLY important to her - my refusal or inability to do it would be enough to end the relationship.

If I was someone's slave and she said "let's do hardsports" then I'm supposed to do it.   If however I refuse, then again this would break the dynamic.  And so in some essence there isn't a lot of difference.

However, I could be someone's slave who has zero desire for hardsports - so - yeah

There's some good blogs on sub v slave and a lot is that people have different boundaries.  In essence there is so much overlap at times it all comes down to using the words for *your dynamic* you are most happy with

Though, if you're single, probably don't call yourself a slave as it gives the wrong idea. 

[ge****]

4 hours ago, HerNewToy said:

This is one of the things that confuses me. I keep getting different stories on this. I’ve been told that subs and slaves, are the same thing. Also Doms/Dommes and Master/Mistress etc are the same things. Then I’m told they’re not. The reading I’ve done all seems to be different peoples perspectives.

There can be different perspectives for sure and in that respect the definition can be a very individual thing.
.
For me though the clear distinction is that Master/slave type relationships the dominant holds complete control at all times - Dom/me/sub there's more equality to and it may only include control at certain times.
.
But that's my distinction not a general one.

[No****]

7 hours ago, eyemblacksheep said:

So - here is the truth

They are largely the same thing.   People will argue the toss about this, but there's a lot where there is more of a fantasy element.

Usually people will dictate that the difference between a submissive and a slave is that the submissive has limits, a safe word, a right to say no - so on - but a slave does not.

Some people will differentiate that a slave is in an almost permanent CNC arrangement.   They do what they're told, when they're told, no complaints no question.  No limits.

Except...

Everyone has limits.  Be it how much they can physically carry. Their stamina. Their strength.  Anything medical that prevents one thing or another.  So you always have to work with someones capabilities.

I guess if I was someone's sub and she said "let's do hardsports" and I said "that isn't something I do" she could accept that and not do that. But if this is something REALLY important to her - my refusal or inability to do it would be enough to end the relationship.

If I was someone's slave and she said "let's do hardsports" then I'm supposed to do it.   If however I refuse, then again this would break the dynamic.  And so in some essence there isn't a lot of difference.

However, I could be someone's slave who has zero desire for hardsports - so - yeah

There's some good blogs on sub v slave and a lot is that people have different boundaries.  In essence there is so much overlap at times it all comes down to using the words for *your dynamic* you are most happy with

Though, if you're single, probably don't call yourself a slave as it gives the wrong idea. 

This is the most enlightening explanation of the nuances between the two and now I “get it”. Thank you!

[ey****]

2 hours ago, NotWhyButWhyNot said:

This is the most enlightening explanation of the nuances between the two and now I “get it”. Thank you!

what some people do - and this is a very fair way also...

they will progress their relationship in statuses and update the titles as they go.  And to a degree you can then see a difference in your own relationship.   But some of it to a degree is just going deeper into submission.  Not that this is a necessity. Sometimes you can also see the difference if it is someone with multiple subs with different dynamics.  

But remember of course, in slavery there were no choices and no outs - if you wanted to leave you got shot, if you didn't do a good job you got beaten, if your owner had a bad day and wanted to, in some way, take it out on you - they would.  If you were too weak to work, if you couldn't be given another job then you were often killed as you were now just a mouth to feed.  

If you're being held, beaten, whatever, and it is consensual then it's not slavery - and if it's against your will it's illegal.  

[sexwith-aghost13]

Don't feel like because you are in a Master/Slave you can no longer have limits or consent now. Also, it does not have to be 24/7, people always say that it has to be an all the time thing and that is incorrect. When leading a bdsm lifestyle its always gonna be different based on relationship types. If you wanna have a cnc master/slave relationship than that is your choice but it doesnt always have to be that way. You can still have a safe word, still have hard limits and still be treated like a person. Same with the master, you both can still be treated like people and have breaks from the dynamic :)

[DD****]

Keep it respectful and your wildest dreams will come true

[si****]

Master all the time