Submission. More than sexual?

[Deleted Member]

There are definitely tons of different ways to be considered submissive with lots of different umbrella terms. That being said what are the best ways of being a submissive whether it's with a Dom or without. I've been trying to figure out how to be the best sub I can be by reading about it online and even through other people's stories and bios but maybe it's best if I just post about it. So if you guys can educate me and even send links I'd appreciate it!

[FETMOD-TF]

Hi all,

You are welcome to share links from Youtube & Vimeo videos, links to Wikipedia articles and Instagram posts however please remember that no other links are allowed.  

[ge****]

I think a lot of the answer to that comes from within - there is no "best" ISO standard to measure against - it's about what you want for you - what you consider would make you a good and desirable submissive - yes that may be guided by a dominant who you've agreed the make up of a dynamic with and how they expect you to be within that agreed dynamic - but ultimately it's down to you.
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And recognising you're an individual with your own wants and needs is the first step in that.

[Me****]

I dont know if there is a specific answer to that as it varies so much. Each sub is different in their own little ways and even further each sub changes slightly in according to whoever their dom is. So I dont believe there is a "best way" to be submissive since its a very individualized thing. That being said. I think the best way to go about being a new submissive to to approach it with an open and inquisitive mind. Your absolutely right that there are a lot of different umbrella terms for different types of submissives. The best advice that I can give is to continue to do research into these umbrellas and find which ones feel like they classify how you want to submit. From there something you really should do is talk to whoever your dom is when you get one. Ask them what their expectations are and lay out your own. It is heavily encouraged to have boundaries. Feel free to experiment with different umbrellas of submission and you will eventually hone in on the ones that are best for you. As for the "more then sexual" part of your question. That is also heavily individualized. Some people are submissibe to their dom 24/7. Others are only in a home environment and not out in the public eye, while others are strictly in the bedroom and nowhere else. All of these are completely valid ways to live a bdsm life and again comes down to the idividual person and the individual relationship. Sorry if this doesnt help to much with your question but its about the best answer that I can give 😅

[ab****]

19 hours ago, MedicOne said:

I dont know if there is a specific answer to that as it varies so much. Each sub is different in their own little ways and even further each sub changes slightly in according to whoever their dom is. So I dont believe there is a "best way" to be submissive since its a very individualized thing. That being said. I think the best way to go about being a new submissive to to approach it with an open and inquisitive mind. Your absolutely right that there are a lot of different umbrella terms for different types of submissives. The best advice that I can give is to continue to do research into these umbrellas and find which ones feel like they classify how you want to submit. From there something you really should do is talk to whoever your dom is when you get one. Ask them what their expectations are and lay out your own. It is heavily encouraged to have boundaries. Feel free to experiment with different umbrellas of submission and you will eventually hone in on the ones that are best for you. As for the "more then sexual" part of your question. That is also heavily individualized. Some people are submissibe to their dom 24/7. Others are only in a home environment and not out in the public eye, while others are strictly in the bedroom and nowhere else. All of these are completely valid ways to live a bdsm life and again comes down to the idividual person and the individual relationship. Sorry if this doesnt help to much with your question but its about the best answer that I can give 😅

Great response!. This was very helpful for me as well. Thank you for the question nsfw_little.

[Mi****]

Just figure out what kind of sub you'd like to be, and state it clearly on your bio. Someone who really likes that type of sub will enjoy their time with you knowing they can focus on their favourite kinks, and you'll both have a great time! Just remember that between safe words and discussion of the specifics, the sub leads the interaction, so as long as you're clear about your boundaries and respect those of others, everyone will feel comfortable and be able to enjoy themselves 😊 Have fun!

[Me****]

11 hours ago, ab2022 said:

Great response!. This was very helpful for me as well. Thank you for the question nsfw_little.

Glad that I was able to help out ^-^

[Deleted Member]

Thank you guys for the help. Will definitely go back to this thread often as I continue learning more about submission

[li****]

You gotta find what kind of sub you are, and what puts you in that space, for myself, when I know I’ve pleased my daddy/dom and they tell me how good of a girl I am, or waiting for my dom on my knees and adverting my gaze until they say other wise, always responding with yes sir/ma’am (or whatever dom name you call them). Abiding by the rules set by them, etc

[Deleted Member]

Have you read the New Bottoming book? By Dossie Easton and Personally for me the best subs are playing along those guidelines, so we all know we are not adding any more hurt to the world. Then, as a bit of a contradiction to that... I'm power hungry so the more power someone is willing to offer me, the hotter it is. But always with consent and trust, which takes time to build. There are no short cuts.

[ho****]

You don't have to read about anything, if you put yourself on that level then your not being yourself. Be the best sub that you can be, if anyone has a problem with that then they are using you for their personal gain.

[ge****]

1 hour ago, houston784 said:

You don't have to read about anything, if you put yourself on that level then your not being yourself. Be the best sub that you can be, if anyone has a problem with that then they are using you for their personal gain.

Whilst it's true that you don't *have* to read about anything - I completely disagree that you're not being yourself by doing so - through learning and reading you increase your knowledge, both of the good things and bad, and so can find your true self.
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I know for a fact that if I'd not got involved in sites like this and read of other people's experiences, or read blogs, books etc that my mind would be a lot more closed to many things than it is and that I wouldn't truly have come to know myself for the person I am.