Is it true? Do women not look for nice guys

[Ni****]

I’ve been on dating apps and everything of the sort, I just wanna know, do women look for nice guys

[BrittReid]

Nice guys are predictable, boring. Most women have that at home already. Need something exciting, different.

[Deleted Member]

I love a nice guy just don't be nice at home

[Strix]

1 minute ago, BrittReid said:

Nice guys are predictable, boring. Most women have that at home already. Need something exciting, different.

Where do you get that nice guys are predictable from?

[ey****]

there's plenty of articles on the wider internet about 'nice guys' and the kinda problem with them

"Nice" isn't a personality. "Nice" isn't an interest.

"Nice" is the bare f**king minimum.

If all you can bring is "you're nice" then you bring nothing.

If you need to tell other people you are "Nice" then you probably aren't - because otherwise they would be able to see - it's interesting how many people who claim to be "Nice" demand replies, or attention or "a chance" - none of which is *actually* nice.

[Sh****]

Nice guys get the girls you'd take home to your mother. Bad guys get the ones you don't want to tell your friends about.

Pros and cons. Swings and roundabouts. Be yourself.

You wouldn't want someone who doesn't fit who you are.

[Ni****]

3 minutes ago, eyemblacksheep said:

there's plenty of articles on the wider internet about 'nice guys' and the kinda problem with them

"Nice" isn't a personality. "Nice" isn't an interest.

"Nice" is the bare f**king minimum.

If all you can bring is "you're nice" then you bring nothing.

If you need to tell other people you are "Nice" then you probably aren't - because otherwise they would be able to see - it's interesting how many people who claim to be "Nice" demand replies, or attention or "a chance" - none of which is *actually* nice.

It’s not that all I bring is nice, I bring a lot, I’m just wondering if I have to change cause I’m not what women are looking for

[ey****]

1 minute ago, Nick69420 said:

It’s not that all I bring is nice, I bring a lot, I’m just wondering if I have to change cause I’m not what women are looking for

if you are genuinely nice - then, yes, of course.  But as I say - "nice" is neither a personality nor an interest.  

[Deleted Member]

7 minutes ago, eyemblacksheep said:

there's plenty of articles on the wider internet about 'nice guys' and the kinda problem with them

"Nice" isn't a personality. "Nice" isn't an interest.

"Nice" is the bare f**king minimum.

If all you can bring is "you're nice" then you bring nothing.

If you need to tell other people you are "Nice" then you probably aren't - because otherwise they would be able to see - it's interesting how many people who claim to be "Nice" demand replies, or attention or "a chance" - none of which is *actually* nice.

this. so much of this. being nice does not equal entitled to attention.

[Ni****]

2 minutes ago, enbydaddydom said:

this. so much of this. being nice does not equal entitled to attention.

I’m just tired of being ignored, I try so hard and it feels like nobody wants me, I try and be polite and respectful, and I try to be exactly what they want but it never works

[Strix]

Being yourself, your true self is what you are to bring to the table.

[Hu****]

Well my experiences now days you gotta beat cheat on your woman for them to love you & stay with you

[Deleted Member]

4 minutes ago, Nick69420 said:

I’m just tired of being ignored, I try so hard and it feels like nobody wants me, I try and be polite and respectful, and I try to be exactly what they want but it never works

This is the issue right there: you're trying to be nice and respectful to get with them. Be yourself - don't modify yourself to what you think girls want. They know you're trying to be good and look like a tool trying to pretend.

You do you and just have fun - women will come. People care way more about being relaxed and happy then if your doing everything right. Honestly it's kinda annoying.

[je****]

No they don’t in my experience, the look for decent human being that know how to interact with them and pay attention to learn how to interact, being nice doesn’t equal
Good sometimes nice guys snap

[je****]

Be yourself and if you don’t know what that is, you’ll never be happy with anyone and they won’t be happy with you.

[Redefine-Horizons]

Seems there is an awfully lot of guys answering on behalf of women. Your opinion on how women think is invalid due to not being properly equipped.

[ey****]

One of the other problems is - what exactly does "nice" mean?

And this ties in with my other points

It's meaningless.

Stop kidding yourself that you are "nice" (most of us all try to be nice in our own definitions of it - and definitions may vary) and, kinda promote - who you are, what you like, what you would be like as a partner... some people will not like it, some people might and that is life.

 

[Go****]

5 minutes ago, Nick69420 said:

I try to be exactly what they want but it never works

Maybe this is one of the ways you need to change, in my opinion at least. If you're changing yourself to be what someone else wants, you're basing a relationship upon a foundation of lies. You need to be yourself. That's the only way to attract the right person.

[Ni****]

2 minutes ago, eyemblacksheep said:

One of the other problems is - what exactly does "nice" mean?

And this ties in with my other points

It's meaningless.

Stop kidding yourself that you are "nice" (most of us all try to be nice in our own definitions of it - and definitions may vary) and, kinda promote - who you are, what you like, what you would be like as a partner... some people will not like it, some people might and that is life.

 

I would say when I try to be “nice” it’s usually to treat them with respect and dignity

[at****]

Women want what they want. Being a nice guy, isn’t a thing. It’s you and only you at the end of the day. Trying to be what they want will end up with failure. Rather be what they need instead of what they want. Be different then the norms, be the wild card they have not seen or experienced before. You can still be the nice guy- but be the mysterious nice guy. Don’t throw all your cards down too soon.

[Ni****]

4 minutes ago, GoodGirlBetterBrat said:

Maybe this is one of the ways you need to change, in my opinion at least. If you're changing yourself to be what someone else wants, you're basing a relationship upon a foundation of lies. You need to be yourself. That's the only way to attract the right person.

I really appreciate all the advice, what I’m gaining is, be myself and don’t change based upon the relationship cause you don’t want a foundation of lies, did I miss anything important?

[ey****]

2 minutes ago, Nick69420 said:

it’s usually to treat them with respect and dignity

again, what does that even mean?

because one person's idea would vary wildly from anothers

[Cu****]

15 minutes ago, Nick69420 said:

I’m just tired of being ignored, I try so hard and it feels like nobody wants me, I try and be polite and respectful, and I try to be exactly what they want but it never works

This is going to sound brutal but the truth often is. But… people are either interested in you or not, trying to ‘change’ to fit someone else’s ideal, isn’t going to work. Firstly you are who you are, secondly it’s misleading the person so even if it went beyond a first date, you are effectively manipulating someone, that’s not being a nice guy. They are going to spot the inconsistencies and it’s going to end badly.

No one is desired by everyone, sometimes we just have to look a little harder and wait a little long. It’s nothing to do with being a nice guy or not. Also, if I were you I would Google what people say about men who use the term ‘nice guy’, it’s not good. If you have that in your profile, it’s a major red flag to pretty much everyone.

[Ni****]

2 minutes ago, atlantis362 said:

Women want what they want. Being a nice guy, isn’t a thing. It’s you and only you at the end of the day. Trying to be what they want will end up with failure. Rather be what they need instead of what they want. Be different then the norms, be the wild card they have not seen or experienced before. You can still be the nice guy- but be the mysterious nice guy. Don’t throw all your cards down too soon.

That’s actually good info

[Deleted Member]

So you're assuming being nice is all a person would look for in a partner & nothing else matters, that because you say you are nice that nothing else about your personality, life & interests would matter to someone, they should like you because you say you're nice - it's like saying I make nice food, why doesn't everyone love it, I think its nice, so they should too but everyone has different tastes.

No offence but the attitude that I'm nice, women should like me, is probably what's putting women off because you're giving the impression they're that shallow, that they should be throwing themselves at you, because you said your nice regardless of whether they are attracted to you, if you have same interests, same desires, same needs, same lifestyle