Reluctance

[Deleted Member]

I like the idea of people enjoying a sexual act almost against their will. Doesn’t need to be rough, though it can be. It’s the idea that the person is submitting to something that either embarrasses, shames or degrades them and they aren’t exactly willing, at least at first, but it is turning them on so much and they can’t help submitting eventually. ‘I shouldn’t be doing this’ or ‘this is so wrong’ etc. Anyone else, or is this just cnc by a different name do you think?

[ey****]

A lot depends on the context

but - I dunno, I've had plenty of "I really shouldn't do this - but it feels so hot" moments - which included doing foot worship at Kings Cross Station

But I think there is differences between reluctance and CNC

Reluctance can be something you might not want to do (for whatever reason), but do because it feels so hot

CNC might be something you do - because it's CNC 

[ca****]

I would say that's a form of CNC, they're consenting to doing something they wouldn't "want to happen". The idea of being on that predicament makes them nervous, scared, ashamed and above all turned on! All within limits and set boundaries obviously so the reluctance doesn't matter as they will be "made to" in a safe and sane manner.

[DeviantInside]

Ok so let’s talk about taboos. I love breaking taboos and that’s one of the things I love about the kink world, it provides a safe place to explore things that otherwise would be wrong. I have had the pleasure of exploring things like racial ***, misogyny *** with feminists, body ***, and been the only person a couple of pro Dommes have ever submitted to and playing on that too. But in all these cases it was done from the basis of an already established dynamic where it was always clear that this was pure play, a fantasy being played out and that there was never any malice or ill intent behind it all. We knew and understood each other and I also knew what triggers to avoid. So we were able to explore these taboos safe in the knowledge that once the play was over we could still be ourselves, no change in respect for each other and not how we genuinely felt either about each other or in life generally.

[Je****]

I am very weird and divided on this topic.


I am open to CNC. ***d play and sex IF there is NO distress.
I am personally triggered by the R*** play aspect.

But to be "***d as a sex slave", Sleep sex or ***d orgasms and "bred" I am fine about it...
Those are big turn ons for me.... But the second there is distresss, screaming, thrashing and brutality (?) I cannot cope. At all.

[DeviantInside]

1 hour ago, Finally_Jen said:

I am very weird and divided on this topic.


I am open to CNC. ***d play and sex IF there is NO distress.
I am personally triggered by the R*** play aspect.

But to be "***d as a sex slave", Sleep sex or ***d orgasms and "bred" I am fine about it...
Those are big turn ons for me.... But the second there is distresss, screaming, thrashing and brutality (?) I cannot cope. At all.

This is precisely a large part of the point I was trying to make. While these things can be exciting, both in the abstract and in reality, it is also a potential minefield. As you demonstrate it’s not even as clear cut as saying any given taboo/cnc dynamic is ok as there may be nuances that could instantly turn an erotic scene into a traumatic one. As always the better the communication and mutual understanding the better it is for all.

[Je****]

15 hours ago, DeviantInside said:

This is precisely a large part of the point I was trying to make. While these things can be exciting, both in the abstract and in reality, it is also a potential minefield. As you demonstrate it’s not even as clear cut as saying any given taboo/cnc dynamic is ok as there may be nuances that could instantly turn an erotic scene into a traumatic one. As always the better the communication and mutual understanding the better it is for all.

Thats exactly it. 

There's a fine line to taboo erotic fantasy and absolute crippling destruction. 

I would partake in a compliant sex slave dynamic and be perfectly fine being used. 

But not one where im expected to get distressed. It would all feel too real.. strip the fantasy away and traumatise me. 

I want it to be and remain a somewhat calm but tense scense. Not chaotic. 

Its took me a long time to work out on what scale with CNC i have stood. 

 

But regardless this would only be done with someone id trust with my life. To be able to read me and the signs and know before i even speak.. when to stop. 

Someone ever pushes that edge and triggers me I'd never want to try it again tbh.

[Deleted Member]

I’m with Finally_Jen some aspects are a turn on others aren’t and it depends on the situation and/or people involved. I think some woman discover to late that certain aspects are triggers which complicates things

[Therapist]

Love Cnc and *** play, as long the trust is there and alot of discussion on limits etc. You can take your Sub the darkness and she will let go as such as long there is that safety net that what she doesn't wanna do, you Don't do!! An if her mind suddenly says ohh No it's got stop Then you stop!! No ifs or but. Stop, restraints, gags whatever off and into full after care mode. Get all that in place and right and the world's your oyster. Me personally abs love screaming and moaning through a tight gag 😉

[Je****]

2 minutes ago, Therapist said:

Love Cnc and *** play, as long the trust is there and alot of discussion on limits etc. You can take your Sub the darkness and she will let go as such as long there is that safety net that what she doesn't wanna do, you Don't do!! An if her mind suddenly says ohh No it's got stop Then you stop!! No ifs or but. Stop, restraints, gags whatever off and into full after care mode. Get all that in place and right and the world's your oyster. Me personally abs love screaming and moaning through a tight gag 😉

Sadly i will never ever be into this or agree on it (personally) after a real life traumtic experience. It's completely off the cards, the R*** scenario. Absolutely not. Each to their own but even the smallest thing can completely make me spiral. 

 

But a quiet and compliant this is your job as my cum slut kinda role... used and ***d compliantly. Yes. I am okay with that. It's all down to the content and method i feel. It's just sadly too real for me the second a scream is happening. I definately would never suit someone into this cus i would never be able to allow their fantasy. My worry dating anyone who does this kinda play is they'd even ask me if i would reconsider, cus then i would walk. But thats my personal thing. Im sure some are okay with such taboos. Even a fanny glory hole im cool with, all being anon. Details matter though i feel.

[Therapist]

Completely agree and you have to be you and honest and me personally if the sub doesn't enjoy the play/scene then neither do I. It all has to be on agreed terms an those terms stuck too

[HeHasAHorsePP]

I'd love this for myself