Fem dommes what's expected?

[ma****]

30 minutes ago, Blackbird5543 said:

I'm a magnet for them! Please help me, Ladies! I couldn't say no and have 3 (almost 4)

Do you mean as in non-gentlemenley men, if so you NEED to get rid of them, they are going if not already, do damage to you weather physically, mentally or emotionally and it's NOT acceptable at all, are you in contact face to face or over technology?, Because over tech it's a lot easier to say politely, it isn't working and your getting nothing from it, so I'm finishing the play/dynamic, thanks for the time you have spent with me and I hope you find what you need, and apart from a reply from them hopefully understanding, that should be it, but if not and they keep pestering you you can always block them, but I would suggest not deleting the ending conversation, just incase thing's get way out of hand and you have to report them, because it's illegal and it's evidence, but if face to face it could be a lot harder, unless they don't know where you live and don't know a lot of personal stuff, have you actually started play with them or just still discussing thing's?.

[Bi****]

We only do it on the computer. I've only been on a few weeks. I even helped one of them who cross dresses find a dress🙄

[Bi****]

They seem so innocent and naive. I felt like I had to say yes.

[sW****]

June 7, gemini_man said:

Know I'm neither a Domme nor a lady, but was talking about this earlier and from the perspective of a male submissive, I much prefer the D/s element to develop naturally and organically with a prospective dominant than to make that the focus of conversation with someone from the start.
.
I'm more interested in the person than their dominance to begin with - for me to *be* submissive I need to *feel* submissive to someone, and not just because they say they are dominant, but because that balance has been found naturally.
.
I've had messages from apparent dominants where they've started off from a dominant stance and it just doesn't work for me - let me get to know the person first and the rest *may* follow.

I needed more hearts for this comment. ♥ ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[Bi****]

I shouldn't have rolled my eyes when talking about shopping either my boy. I had the suggestion. I get the feeling there is no one in his corner. If I can help him or my other boys, I'll do it.

Is there a way to know there are more Dommes out there? I was approached by 2 men yesterday. All of the conversation is leading to their asking. I have 3, and I have my fantasy of 2 switch partners dreaming up and doing everything kinky we can think of in my list of chat people

[Bi****]

I can't take on 2 more. Maybe I have a mommy gene. They are so innocent and naive.

[ey****]

1 hour ago, Blackbird5543 said:

I can't take on 2 more. Maybe I have a mommy gene. They are so innocent and naive.

So. Stop taking them on for 3 reasons

1) your own load and well being - it's too much

2) while there is a want to help folk - taking someone on in any capacity you don't have time for is going to mean you're not really taking them on properly so they don't benefit properly anyway

3) crucially - every additional person you take on affects the time you can give to those you've already taken on meaning people who you'd initially offered to help are now getting less and less of your time

mind, there is someone I know who had done similar-ish and found that it was straining time and that she could find time for them all if she cut hours in her day job BUT had the subs contribute to the shortfall in her earnings - amazing how quickly guys then disappear... 

[Bi****]

Thank you, eyemblacksheep. You put it perfectly!💖

[ey****]

I know someone who tried to motherhen all the lonely sub guys to give them "guidance"

I was chatting to one at a munch once who was kinda "I wish I could do x, y, z?"

I was like "aren't you a sub of _______ raise it with her"

and he was like "it feels like I'm just a sub on paper - she obviously has her close group, but getting time from her is hard. She keeps taking on more guys and I'm no further forward than before I was her sub" 

I don't think the person had bad intentions - but in wanting to help everyone it ended up being as if it was no one 

[Bi****]

Plus with the 3 of them, I'm recuperating from a back operation! OMG I have been not giving anyone including me the attention we deserve!😢 I really want to thank you all. Is there a class I could take? I really want to do right by everyone.

[Deleted Member]

You have to put strong boundaries with anything! With the Subs, they can be vampires without knowing.

[ey****]

I can help teach you.

It goes...

"Hello, I'm really sorry - I have too much on right now. Why not write any questions on the forum ?  Many people will be able to give you answers or opinions.   Good luck with your search" 

That's the lesson.  

[Deleted Member]

1 hour ago, Blackbird5543 said:

Plus with the 3 of them, I'm recuperating from a back operation! OMG I have been not giving anyone including me the attention we deserve!😢 I really want to thank you all. Is there a class I could take? I really want to do right by everyone.

I have a great idea with your situation... back operation. 

If they are so pushy, find one that is willing clean your house, and cook until you are well. 

A "Serious" Sub will do it for their Mistress!

I would do it.👍

Watch... they will disappear like the wind.🌬

 

[ey****]

the only kinda problem then is it might well involve inviting someone who is a stranger into your home

there is also the problem, particularly if they are new/naive that they will mess up - deliberately or otherwise - this means it's more work for you and they'll probably be hankering for a punishment

[Deleted Member]

23 minutes ago, eyemblacksheep said:

the only kinda problem then is it might well involve inviting someone who is a stranger into your home

there is also the problem, particularly if they are new/naive that they will mess up - deliberately or otherwise - this means it's more work for you and they'll probably be hankering for a punishment

I would never allow a stranger in my home. This is after a period of knowing them. Any *** takes forever or never completely heals. There is plenty of time. 

With the mess ups, there has to be clear details, and long negotiations.

Like you said "Problems"...  nothing is gauranteed.

[Deleted Member]

Hello! Interesting to see how this has developed... really good conversations that k you everyone! I think its a learning curve 🤔 I think the rush of establishing dominant energy comes with the wanting to reach out to as many as possible, and "healer, heal thy self" comes to mind. I went though this and wanted to be polyamorous and just found it took too much from me. Now I think actually one quality relationship is all I really have time for. I have a few conversations but I don't want virtual relationships although I do have a few ongoing, I much prefer real world flesh 😅 maybe one day I'll have a hareem of mansl*ts but I'll have to win the lottery first and open sl*ts paradise!

[Deleted Member]

The best fantasy I ever has sold to be was by a catfish slave... I was totally suckered in... and it was great except also completely unrealistic. It would be lovely to think it could have happened but ultimately it wad a waste of time so now I don't really entertain conversations with someone the other side of the globe because I know it will require huge amounts of time and energy to establish a connection strong enough to transfer into the real world.