Deleted Member Posted June 14, 2022 Posted June 14, 2022 I am naturally Dominant and there is a thin line between dominant and abusive. Clear communication, trust and understanding takes care of most problems (not texting). My conditions are: Don’t take my kindness for weakness and basic respect is a must. In modern era, the lines between Dominance and Submission has been blurred so much that some of the only ways most people can realize these dynamics is through BDSM plays. This makes BDSM one of the only and accepted mediums to practice, Dominance and Submission, which are natural, historic and dying dynamics. Modern woman and submissiveness are in general opposites. Most women naturally prefer to be submissive, however through practice predominantly choose men who ultimately submit to them through pressure and time. Some Dominant Men that don’t give in to female pressures, lose their counterpart. This is how most separations happen, mainly because the female of the dynamic refuses to submit to the male counterpart. True Dominant male is a rare breed because they don’t mind losing an uncooperative female counterpart by not submitting to her ways if he doesn’t see it fit with his principles in life. The ultimate test of all self proclaimed Dominant men who want, men and women alike, to recognize them as Dominant in all aspects of life is as follows: Are you willing to lose your uncooperative counterpart in order to prove your Dominance? This is where most men fail. This is where most women claim to not have found a man they can submit to, where in reality (depending on their age) females have most probably encountered that person but refused to submit for personal reasons. A true submissive character can be expressed and achieved through selfless acts, giving with no expectations in return and unwavering trust and confidence in their counterpart to make the right choices. A true Dominant character can be expressed through fair assessment of situations, logical thinking, wise decision making, fairness and unwavering trust in their counterpart to make the right choices. Sex is not mentioned in this scenario because sexual acts are more ceremonial then representations of true dynamics. Dom/Sub sexual dynamics can be studied online through videos and books and performed behind closed doors by people who do not agree with the lifestyle. However true Dom/Sub dynamics can not reach its full potential or be practiced in regular life if the participants are not willing to agree to basic principles. True Dominant men and Submissive women are a rare commodity in modern society due to institutional feminization of men in general and empowerment of female entrepreneurship and competitive business mind frame, while mostly in that same space competing with men. Some women want to change their Dominant ways and become more Submissive and true to their nature, however this desire is met with the act of shame. On the same token, Dominant characteristics have been discouraged in men through accusations and shaming, while Dominance is consistently encouraged for woman through TV, Social Media, books and corporate environments. This is how the competitive nature in women is solidified through dominant characteristics. Competitive and rebellious nature is the opposites of Submissiveness. In modern society, one of the only forms of Submissive and Dominant traits expressed and practiced are ceremonial and predominantly performed through sexual acts, scenes and plays. when in reality, Dominance and Submission used to be the core values and the tools to build the relational infrastructure for future generations. Today you will see many Dominant men ***d to submit most of the time to their female counterparts in order to not loose the steady supply of sexual gratification. This in itself is an indirect submission by the dominant to the submissive through direct sexual manipulation. Sub and Dom dynamics of the modern Era. by Art X. June 10. ,2022 Product of insomnia lol… You’re welcome and Enjoy.
ge**** Posted June 14, 2022 Posted June 14, 2022 I could pick that apart bit by bit and counter much of it, but to be honest it will probably serve no purpose. . I will ask this however, why does Domination and submission have to be genderised as you have done? Can you not accept that society has moved on since the 1970s when much of what you are suggesting was the accepted "norm" and that here in the 2020s a greater level of equality is being established such that more and more people are being seen and treated as equals regardless of gender, race, sexuality and more. . There's a ***y long way to go still for sure, but please not let's take things backwards which seems to be the thrust of a lot of what you are saying. . I'm a male submissive, not because I'm a suppressed dominant, but because I'm a male submissive, it's in my nature and always has been - I've not been downtrodden by societal change, but I do celebrate it and hope that it continues to find parity for all, and a position where some of the misogynistic clap trap being spouted both here and in general is a thing very much of the past.
Th**** Posted June 14, 2022 Posted June 14, 2022 It is always interesting to see another perspective that is tangently opposed to your own. Don't get me wrong I see exactly where you are coming from here, you expressed it very well. The odd thing is I have never compared vanilla relationships to D/s dynamics. I mean I brought up a load of kids with one of my subs and trust me. Around the *** we were very vanilla but on our own we were extremely D/s. In my humble opinion I have always found that the more someone is able to assert their dominance over others if they so wish. The more it means when they submit to you. We all do D/s dynamics our own way and as long as you can find one person that agrees then your good. I think that the best approach to any submissive is to paraphrase your own words, "Don't take their submission for weakness and respect is a must." I find people follow me whatever I do it is just me being me. The difference between a sub following me and anyone else is simple it is Consent from both parties. I will grant you though that in a dynamic that attraction can be very powerful but it is after the information communicated has been consented to that the dynamic can move forward.
Lo**** Posted June 14, 2022 Posted June 14, 2022 2 hours ago, gemini_man said: I could pick that apart bit by bit and counter much of it, but to be honest it will probably serve no purpose. . I will ask this however, why does Domination and submission have to be genderised as you have done? Can you not accept that society has moved on since the 1970s when much of what you are suggesting was the accepted "norm" and that here in the 2020s a greater level of equality is being established such that more and more people are being seen and treated as equals regardless of gender, race, sexuality and more. . There's a ***y long way to go still for sure, but please not let's take things backwards which seems to be the thrust of a lot of what you are saying. . I'm a male submissive, not because I'm a suppressed dominant, but because I'm a male submissive, it's in my nature and always has been - I've not been downtrodden by societal change, but I do celebrate it and hope that it continues to find parity for all, and a position where some of the misogynistic clap trap being spouted both here and in general is a thing very much of the past. I had the same thought. I could pick it apart, but really, I can’t be arsed because, like you say, there’s likely no point. It’s quite useful that some people fly their opinions from the mast head and save you the time and trouble of talking to them to find out.
Go**** Posted June 14, 2022 Posted June 14, 2022 I'd be here all night if I went through this and answered bit by bit, but frankly, I'm lacking in both time and inclination to do so. I did however, want to make two points; One: That is a very broad brush you're using to ***t Dominant & Submissive people with. Two: I find it interesting that you speak of the feminisation of men, and yet your username, chosen by you, presumably, as a dominant man, is the spelling for a female dominant.
Deleted Member Posted June 14, 2022 Author Posted June 14, 2022 (edited) I'm not dominate in all aspects of life, I can be pretty opinionated and will die on my hills(literally potentially) but I don't really like the concept of 24/7. When I hopefully get married at some point I expect my future wife to probably control the household stuff more than me, but I do expect to be the primary breadwinner. Sexually I do want her to submit to me sometimes, but it doesn't have to be all the time. Not sure how this fits into the BDSM communities terminology. Edited June 14, 2022 by Deleted Member
DeviantInside Posted June 14, 2022 Posted June 14, 2022 (edited) Oh this basically smacks of “alpha male” mentality. You’re entitled to you opinion. I fundamentally disagree with it on so many levels and the more I read the more I found to disagree with. I am dominant… I am also happy to give without expecting anything in return… dominant doesn’t mean being selfish or not caring about anyone else… dominance isn’t the same as narcissistic or sociopathic. A dominant should be fair (IMO) but does that mean a submissive isn’t fair, logical or wise? Why? Why is any of this gendered? Why is there a thin line between dominance and ***? No there isn’t, there is a very clear line. One is a positive, mutually beneficial dynamic, the other is psychologically damaging. Submission isn’t weakness, it is a giving of trust to someone that’s earned it (or should be). Why is bdsm one of the only mediums to practice dominance? I have no problem being a natural dominant in all walks of life, in any group dynamic I tend to be listened to, my opinions at least given countenance, and often turned to for advice. Why that is other people would have to say, but I doubt it’s because I’m male. Most women prefer to be submissive? Do you have a basis for this assertion? Some do, some don’t, some do with some people and not with others. And same with men. What female pressure to be submissive? I have never felt this. Even with my Domme friends they’re not suddenly expecting me to kneel before them, they’re quite happy to talk to me normally, almost as if I’m a human being. I don’t care if people recognise me as dominant… I mean for the most part people can think what they like of me. “True” sub and Dom men and women are rare? Are they though, I have met plenty I would consider to be sub or dom. But they also don’t worry about what. “true” sub or dom is, they’re happy just being themselves, not what some abstract determination has been defined by someone else for them. What dominant characteristics have been discouraged? Even the ones you list as being “true” dominant characteristics, logic, fairness, wisdom… where are those discouraged? I could go on but even my own insomnia has limits… you’re welcome. Edited June 14, 2022 by DeviantInside
Go**** Posted June 15, 2022 Posted June 15, 2022 8 hours ago, DeviantInside said: almost as if I’m a human being. You had more patience than I with this, but I just wanted to highlight this section. A human dominant? That cannot be!* . . . *sarcasm 😆
Deleted Member Posted June 15, 2022 Author Posted June 15, 2022 I appreciate everyone’s input on this topic. At the end of the day it’s about dialogue and communication. I’m never afraid to express my opinion and consider others input on it.
ey**** Posted June 15, 2022 Posted June 15, 2022 I think one of the most important factors in modern/post-internet D/s is - that people are open to more ideas. We've gone from the era where people's only exposure was how they were told things had to be in a community or family, with a couple of fiction or exaggerated books for reference - to a whole world of ideas. So, a dynamic that works for one person, or that they subscribe to - someone that that doesn't work for doesn't have to go down that route. People can pursue what makes them happy, rather than how they think they should be.
so**** Posted June 15, 2022 Posted June 15, 2022 Just a thought... "Alpha" male & Dominant... Don't they go together? lol or if not together, aren't they at least in the same neighborhood? & Btw there's nothing at all wrong with alphas. Embrace your testosterone & be proud of who you are👍. In my own experience at least, I'd categorize the vast majority of Doms/Dommes I've known, both male AND female, as "alphas". Even the female dominatrix/dommes are "alphas" of the female realm. & I dare say, they are more dominant than the male Doms most of the time 😂lol
Deleted Member Posted June 15, 2022 Author Posted June 15, 2022 Why do you think it is that women can be more dominant then men? Is it because they dont have the same *** of repercussions when it comes to causing harm to a submissive man physically or mentally, then vise-versa?
Recommended Posts