Aftercare

[ut****]

Yes definitely.
A scene without providing aftercare is incomplete for me. It's actually part of the scene in my mind. Keep in mind that a lot of bdsm is not aboout romance at all. So whether you're romantically involved with them or not is beside the point for me personally.
As a Dom I am taking responsibility for the safety of my sub during a scene. For me that includes aftercare. And actually being allowed to provide that aftercare, IS the aftercare I need.

[Pe****]

2 hours ago, utrecht801 said:

Yes definitely.
A scene without providing aftercare is incomplete for me. It's actually part of the scene in my mind. Keep in mind that a lot of bdsm is not aboout romance at all. So whether you're romantically involved with them or not is beside the point for me personally.
As a Dom I am taking responsibility for the safety of my sub during a scene. For me that includes aftercare. And actually being allowed to provide that aftercare, IS the aftercare I need.

Love it!

[ge****]

20 hours ago, Explorers215 said:

Everybody has there opinions and options to this lifestyle. Sex is sex I'm not having romantic sex with nobody other the my partner. So if we engage in sexual activity when we are done I'm not holding, cuddling or making you feel better. As a grown man or woman especially in this lifestyle you should know what and who you are. If you need aftercare after casual sex with somebody who's not your partner then maybe you should go talk to somebody or shouldn't be doing it at all. If you do something that make you feel some type of way that's your problem not the other person. Alot of yous are more damaged in the head with trauma then actually into this lifestyle.

You start out by acknowledging that everybody has their opinions and options in this lifestyle - which absolutely is the case, but then you go on to be fairly dismissive and suggesting that those who have different needs (opinions/options) than your own maybe "should go talk to somebody" and are "damaged in the head" - hardly respecting the different opinions and options you referenced is it?
.
Regardless of kink/vanilla if people like to do things differently to your own way, perhaps just accept that rather than slating it - if your preference is to wipe your cock on the curtains and leave, then fair enough if all concerned are happy with that arrangement - but if they're not then perhaps give some consideration to others.

[Da****]

Yesterday at 04:05 AM, Explorers215 said:

Everybody has there opinions and options to this lifestyle. Sex is sex I'm not having romantic sex with nobody other the my partner. So if we engage in sexual activity when we are done I'm not holding, cuddling or making you feel better. As a grown man or woman especially in this lifestyle you should know what and who you are. If you need aftercare after casual sex with somebody who's not your partner then maybe you should go talk to somebody or shouldn't be doing it at all. If you do something that make you feel some type of way that's your problem not the other person. Alot of yous are more damaged in the head with trauma then actually into this lifestyle.

Wow...just wow... I don't know where to start..there are sooooo many F*CKED up statements in this one post... its so wrong, I would NEVER allow my sub to play with you. You don't treat other people with respect or take responsibility for them, at that time..

[BigPolly]

On 8/27/2022 at 12:05 PM, Explorers215 said:

Everybody has there opinions and options to this lifestyle. Sex is sex I'm not having romantic sex with nobody other the my partner. So if we engage in sexual activity when we are done I'm not holding, cuddling or making you feel better. As a grown man or woman especially in this lifestyle you should know what and who you are. If you need aftercare after casual sex with somebody who's not your partner then maybe you should go talk to somebody or shouldn't be doing it at all. If you do something that make you feel some type of way that's your problem not the other person. Alot of yous are more damaged in the head with trauma then actually into this lifestyle.

If you don’t understand the rules surrounding BDSM & Fet Play (which you obviously don’t) you should be quiet & be willing to learn as you are a danger to others. 
This isn’t about sex nor is it about making anyone feel better it is about the physical damage that can be caused during play or the endorphin changes that can happen during an extreme overload, it is about recognising the change in someone’s look, reaction or breathing during times that require extra awareness & knowing how to counteract those changes or take care of them. It’s about being able to take someone to that extreme high but also the knowledge of what to do to ease them (or yourself) back physically or emotionally into a normal state. 

It’s also about not being a completely dangerous unknowledgeable moron but on a positive your reply clearly shows that you have not got the ability to bring someone to such debaucherous pleasure so they are quite safe in your hands currently.

[La****]

Aftercare of some prenegotiated form should always be a mandatory part of any BDSM interaction.

[Da****]

5 hours ago, BigPolly said:

If you don’t understand the rules surrounding BDSM & Fet Play (which you obviously don’t) you should be quiet & be willing to learn as you are a danger to others. 
This isn’t about sex nor is it about making anyone feel better it is about the physical damage that can be caused during play or the endorphin changes that can happen during an extreme overload, it is about recognising the change in someone’s look, reaction or breathing during times that require extra awareness & knowing how to counteract those changes or take care of them. It’s about being able to take someone to that extreme high but also the knowledge of what to do to ease them (or yourself) back physically or emotionally into a normal state. 

It’s also about not being a completely dangerous unknowledgeable moron but on a positive your reply clearly shows that you have not got the ability to bring someone to such debaucherous pleasure so they are quite safe in your hands currently.

Nicely said...

[Pe****]

Sunday at 04:12 PM, BigPolly said:

If you don’t understand the rules surrounding BDSM & Fet Play (which you obviously don’t) you should be quiet & be willing to learn as you are a danger to others. 
This isn’t about sex nor is it about making anyone feel better it is about the physical damage that can be caused during play or the endorphin changes that can happen during an extreme overload, it is about recognising the change in someone’s look, reaction or breathing during times that require extra awareness & knowing how to counteract those changes or take care of them. It’s about being able to take someone to that extreme high but also the knowledge of what to do to ease them (or yourself) back physically or emotionally into a normal state. 

It’s also about not being a completely dangerous unknowledgeable moron but on a positive your reply clearly shows that you have not got the ability to bring someone to such debaucherous pleasure so they are quite safe in your hands currently.

Well said!!!

[Pe****]

Sunday at 03:35 PM, Daddy-n-Paddy said:

Wow...just wow... I don't know where to start..there are sooooo many F*CKED up statements in this one post... its so wrong, I would NEVER allow my sub to play with you. You don't treat other people with respect or take responsibility for them, at that time..

Well said

[Mr****]

Where’s this brew then?

[BigPolly]

5 hours ago, MrHorrortown said:

Where’s this brew then?

This is Fet, nothing is ever straightforward or goes how you expect it to 😂

[Mr****]

1 hour ago, BigPolly said:

This is Fet, nothing is ever straightforward or goes how you expect it to 😂

Thanks BP - for moment I thought I was in Asda buying a kettle..🙄😉

[BigPolly]

1 hour ago, MrHorrortown said:

Thanks BP - for moment I thought I was in Asda buying a kettle..🙄😉

Hush with your sarcasm & mockery 😂

[Ra****]

After care is critical. Always. Not just for the sub to recover and take advantage of the pretty brain chemicals generated by the experience, but for the dom to feel closure without the sting of abrupt disconnection. The enduring effects of intense play can only truly be experienced when serotonin and oxytocin are cultivated thru the dopamine and adrenalin during after care imo.

[ca****]

Depends on the person.

[po****]

i wouldn't say someone is just getting used if there's no aftercare but u should always be checking if they want it or even a negotiation about what worked/didn't after

[Deleted Member]

I agree that aftercare should be given if it's wanted and always offered. I'm not sure if they would have necessarily been used if they didn't want it.

[Deleted Member]

Think about it this way .. even in solo play your phone lays beside you when you’re done Why shouldn’t your mate ? Even if for a brief period before ensuing adulting

[Mr****]

But can it make a decent brew?

[Pe****]

7 hours ago, MrHorrortown said:

But can it make a decent brew?

Stop thinking about teabags 😂😂

[Fi****]

Haha brilliant comments

[Pr****]

AGREED!! Not getting aftercare after my first ever session, almost made me turn my back on this lifestyle.

[Pe****]

18 hours ago, NatrllySeductve said:

AGREED!! Not getting aftercare after my first ever session, almost made me turn my back on this lifestyle.

Same here!!!!

[CopperKnob]

To the Dtypes, whatever your flavour. If you have the ability to send an stype places, you have the responsibility to bring them back ensuring that they're safe.
.
NB where its negotiated/agreed

[Da****]

8 hours ago, CopperKnob said:

To the Dtypes, whatever your flavour. If you have the ability to send an stype places, you have the responsibility to bring them back ensuring that they're safe.
.
NB where its negotiated/agreed

Agreed.. 1000000000%