Success Rate

[Deleted Member]

I’ve been lucky hooked up with a couple in the past since I’ve been back been chatting with a few and haven’t met just yet but it’s in the works and I have no car my son crashed

[Deleted Member]

I have a friend on my profile she’s a mistress but they all want you to pay tribute and in California I’m in Chicago so not in a hurry there

[La****]

13 minutes ago, PhantomFlogger said:

I dont want to sound preachy but there are many people in our community that think being a Dominant means you can just demand sexual acts, and there are just as many people that think being a sub is letting someone else do what they want to you.

These people will find eachother very quickly and will rapidly devolve into nothing more than a wank between strangers, figuratively and literally.

That means if you are looking for an actual connection with someone who understands BDSM and how it is built on communication, then you have to stop grabbing at the low hanging fruit and climb that tree. I promise you that once you put in the effort to understand dynamics and the community; people will come to you with questions and invitations.

I agree... I get a lot of the same sort of entitled attitudes from subs, too... like, just because I am a top means that I am a fantasy facilitator for their personal scenarios. Some take it a step further and act as though I am a fetish dispenser. Its tiresome to write well-crafted messages and get back a bunch of half-assed, one word replies (Even a sentence is too much? LOL). You just have to shrug and laugh a little to yourself and move on. Its an instant gratification world we live in, and sadly, putting in the work isn't always seen as the way to achieve sucess. Keep plugging away, and set precedents for what you want to find... keep your standards high and your conduct respectful, and there are some really great people on this app.

[PhantomFlogger]

59 minutes ago, LaVidaDaVueltas said:

I agree... I get a lot of the same sort of entitled attitudes from subs, too... like, just because I am a top means that I am a fantasy facilitator for their personal scenarios. Some take it a step further and act as though I am a fetish dispenser. Its tiresome to write well-crafted messages and get back a bunch of half-assed, one word replies (Even a sentence is too much? LOL). You just have to shrug and laugh a little to yourself and move on. Its an instant gratification world we live in, and sadly, putting in the work isn't always seen as the way to achieve sucess. Keep plugging away, and set precedents for what you want to find... keep your standards high and your conduct respectful, and there are some really great people on this app.

Preeeeeach! 🙌

[ge****]

7 hours ago, CopperKnob said:

Maybe you could post and share your tips in relation to your approach/reason(s) for your success?
Plenty of woman have posted in forums/written on their profiles how they would hope to be approached/what not to do but, you know, perhaps it would be more accepted if a guy wrote it 🤷‍♀️

I think eyem did something along those lines a while back and it devolved into the usual "but it's so hard to meet people" circular arguments that we always see.
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I honestly think it comes down to those who "get" it and those who don't and rarely do things cross over between the two.
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In my experience of both this site and others, the same "complaints" are made on a regular basis and more often than not those doing the complaining about not finding meets or even interactions either don't listen to those who offer sound advice based on their own experiences or based on being the target audience of the complainant, or they post their complaint never to return.
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It seems that often those moaning are just looking for someone or something to blame for their lack of "success" rather than looking closer to home for the reason.

[Me****]

Try being in Mexico.... even less

[Deleted Member]

We're all just profiles on the internet or digitalised people. It's prudent to be cautious of who you write and reply to because it's just words on a screen. It's easy to misconstrue anything with no eye contact, no tone of voice, no body language, nothing. It's just words.

In the end we just have to show a little faith and just meet for a coffee to get a better and real impression of the person you write/reply to. I've met some through various sites/apps and I've not had a single bad time with any of them. Some didn't want to meet again and I didn't want to meet some of them again but they were all pleasant enough to spend an hour with.

Make some effort and get out there to munches, events and have that coffee meet is my advice and don't centre a conversation about having a relationship, kink, fetish, BDSM and "poor me" sob stories. 

Best wishes everyone 🙂

[Do****]

I'm shy in reality but if someone interesting makes the first moves I'm willing to meet.

[Deleted Member]

10 hours ago, CopperKnob said:

Maybe you could post and share your tips in relation to your approach/reason(s) for your success?
Plenty of woman have posted in forums/written on their profiles how they would hope to be approached/what not to do but, you know, perhaps it would be more accepted if a guy wrote it 🤷‍♀️

There's plenty of great advice in this thread. I would say that many men just jump straight into kink related discussions straight away. Try to learn more about the person, their goals, their dreams. Especially if you're not just looking for hookups. Kink will come with time if there's a spark.

[ey****]

4 hours ago, gemini_man said:

I think eyem did something along those lines a while back and it devolved into the usual "but it's so hard to meet people" circular arguments that we always see.

I would still like to see more men share what has worked for them

 

[Deleted Member]

I agree with CopperKnob that women does not have it more easy, and there are pretty much equal. This is not talked about, but a reminder... women go through Ageism. It does not matter how we look, alot of men look at our age. Some... only some, assume older women are desperate since we are older. Maybe some are desperate, but alot of us are PROUD to be our age.😁

[wa****]

It’s my second day but I’m seeing some activity which is more than I’ve seen on other similar sites, I usually give it a week before deleting but this one atleast seems active thus far

[so****]

Oh hell yeah there's a ton of scammers lol as well as fake accounts. But if you put in enough time & are dedicated, you can make some wonderful connections. I've met my last 2 subs on here as well as made a couple really good friends. Sure there's a lot of bull**** to weed out, but there's also a lot of good too. Just be patient & be kind👍🏻🌹

[UK****]

22 hours ago, Chris2221 said:

How successful are people here in making connections?

Connections: I like the site because of the forums.  I am more one for getting the most out of the community.  Sharing thoughts and experiences.  This site has its issues, like all on the net, however, it works well depending on what you are wanting the result to be.

[Bu****]

I've had no success on here, I don't know what's going on, I'll match with someone and when I send a message its like ghost town..Makes me think that it's all automated responses and no one is real here..🤷🏻‍♂️ Also seems no one is anywhere near me or surrounding area..

[Deleted Member]

These ones saying it's a you problem are full of shit if all you do is send a message saying hello how are you next response from them is pay me bitch I own your ass or I only want to be a sugar baby with no interaction other then a simple hello

[ey****]

22 minutes ago, fredon-township503 said:

These ones saying it's a you problem are full of shit if all you do is send a message saying hello how are you next response from them is pay me bitch I own your ass or I only want to be a sugar baby with no interaction other then a simple hello

that is definitely a you problem

try to vet who you are messaging - and - do a bit better than 'hello' 

[PhantomFlogger]

If i was a girl and wanted a guy to leave me alone, I'd pretend to be a bot or ask for ***. Its far more effective than ignoring a guy and receiving ***. They would just not reply and i could go back to messaging people i want to talk to.

What's the worse that can happen? They send me ***?

[Deleted Member]

How are you to get who shows up on your feed as being close half the time they don't even have the basics filled out on their profile or the ones that do don't reply at all still not a me problem I'm not going in trying to dominate someone I don't know anything about just trying to get a positive response from someone to see if maybe we might have something in common

[ey****]

32 minutes ago, PhantomFlogger said:

If i was a girl and wanted a guy to leave me alone, I'd pretend to be a bot or ask for ***. Its far more effective than ignoring a guy and receiving ***. They would just not reply and i could go back to messaging people i want to talk to.

What's the worse that can happen? They send me ***?

the worst is the other person hits report, now having evidence of you asking for *** - and you be booted from the site.

which kinda sucks

but on mist other platforms that's totally fine.

[Deleted Member]

The polite thing to do if not interested is to say so not send me your Venmo or cash app info and demanding *** you say no I leave you alone and go from there or I get into a conversation go to respond and the app tells me their profile is under review and stays that way

[ey****]

13 minutes ago, fredon-township503 said:

half the time they don't even have the basics filled out on their profile

if someone doesn't have the basics filled out on their profile - why are you messaging them?  

they either (a) are still finding their feet on the site, working out what they want, etc. so contacting is fairly predatory

or (b) scammers who have just left the profile there as bait - which you are falling for

or (c) social experiment profile to see how many people will message a crap profile - which you fall for

or (d) lazy, sloppy, not wanting to put any effort in - so, why would you message?

This is the kinda thing I mean by it then being a problem with the person sending a message, not being selective enough in who you reach out for and so it then not getting the responses you desire.

17 minutes ago, fredon-township503 said:

just trying to get a positive response from someone to see if maybe we might have something in common

***tergun

messaging multiple people in hoping for a response.   The 'genuine' people see this is what you are doing and so don't respond as they can see that you are not interested in *them* you are interested in anything

the fakes and scammers, of course, respond - so you get the old "pay me" back.  

[Deleted Member]

That's not true as I said before and I will say again I respond to them sending me a like not trying to respond to everyone I respond with a hello after they have sent me a message first

[Deleted Member]

49 minutes ago, PhantomFlogger said:

If i was a girl and wanted a guy to leave me alone, I'd pretend to be a bot or ask for ***. Its far more effective than ignoring a guy and receiving ***. They would just not reply and i could go back to messaging people i want to talk to.

What's the worse that can happen? They send me ***?

Thank you for the great idea!🤔 Now, I'll just ask for *** with the ones that IGNORE a  polite  "No".  NO TOUCH... give me ***,😂

[Deleted Member]

24 minutes ago, eyemblacksheep said:

the worst is the other person hits report, now having evidence of you asking for *** - and you be booted from the site.

which kinda sucks

but on mist other platforms that's totally fine.

Eyem, why did you have kill a great repellent?. Now, back to only blocking.😂💖