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First time submissive


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Posted
Make sure you know your own boundaries, and that your dom respects those boundaries. Although they are the dom, you control how much you want or need, if they don’t respect that then you will not enjoy yourself or them. Remember it’s your body and you know what you can handle, even if you are willing to push the boundaries make sure you have a safe word in place before so your dom knows when it’s time to back off. Also aftercare for both of you is essential!
Posted
Establish your boundaries with yourself and then clearly communicate them to your dom. If they are good, they will welcome the clear boundary lines so that when they are within them, they don’t have to worry about you.
Posted

Have constant open and honest communication. That way while you are exploring the two of you can keep track of how well each new experience was for you and to what degree you would like to do it again. It's mostly a thought on safety, but it can effect how well you enjoy your time together.
It may be an old sentiment, but all will agree if there is no communication there isn't much of a relationship.

Posted
We are far but I’m at beginning but I’m dom I like we can share our experiences
Posted
Communication truly is most important, even more so than in a traditional relationship, but your Dom should outline things which actually help this, if even in a not so obvious way, likely to help you become comfortable with more communication (but everyone is different, so please take any and all advice and understand it so as to apply it to your specific situation)
Posted
Do a lot of reading, join submissive groups and if your Dom is good and experienced he will guide you. Open, honest and direct conversation is a must so you both are getting what you want out of the relationship.
Posted
@MzzK do you have recommendations for reading material?
Posted

Keep in mind that everyone (including the Dominant and the submissive) are unique people, not all thigns work well for everyone.

Posted
.....Google "submissive guide to" then.... hopefully you'll find what I was trying to link for you
Posted
Follow rules. That's super simple, but a lot of subs try to break rules and get upset when they get punished for it. Ask your Dom to make a rule list so you can learn everything before hand, following the rules perfectly often yields rewards so good luck!
Posted
I ad a Dom who would ask me if I had been a good girl or a bad girl. He had early on told me the choice was mine how I answered, if I was a bad girl I got spankings, a good girl I got kisses and cuddles.
Depending on what I felt I needed was how I would answer him.
Posted
Practice safe words with your partner.
Give honest feedback.
Remember, your _needs_ first, then their desires, your desires last.
If something scares you or is a limit, say, communication is key.
Posted
For starters, ignore any comments/people that say things like "get on your knees and take it. Do as you're told. Be a good girl. Drain his balls" you won't learn anything from that/them. Really guys? Do better. A damn sight better.

For seconds, know yourself, how you relate to kink, your kinks, your limits.

For thirds, just because you've chosen to be submissive to another doesn't mean you don't get a say
Your Dom wants 'rules?', you negotiate what you're comfortable with and what you aren't
Your Dom wants 'punishments' for when you break the rules? You agree what they are and in what circumstances.

Fourths, no means no regardless of your submission. Safewords are great but a no is no different.

Posted
A horror story i hear often at munches from first time subs, especially when dating them too:
"My Dom wanted do something, I said no and he made it an order, so i did it because I thought a sub always does what they are told"
This is what we call a psuedo-dom
Your needs, desires and wants are just as important!
It's a 2 way street.
You choose to submit and can ALWAYS choose to stop.
Submission is a gift, treat it with respect.

On a happier note, if you 'misbehave' the Dom can always funish you.
Posted
Yes. For example when I start with a new sub, and we have the safe word conversation, some girls have asked me, why? Because if I am unintentionally hurting you, I need to know to back off. Rarely does this happen, I try to be educated in anatomy to help me be a better punishment giver without causing harm. But if they won't agree with using a safe word, I've had to cut ties with a few sadly
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