How does everyone feel about jealousy?

[DD****]

A little bit of jealousy is not wrong. As long one does not become a (she)hulk its just an indication of loving someone. Nd wishing their return to love back.

[Deleted Member]

I agree with the comments that state that jealousy is normal, but its how it manifests itself that can be the problem. Jealousy is an emotion and we should all always be open to our emotions. Feeling our feelings in not something we can control. Its how we choose to act on these emotions that causes problems.

And as with any other emotion, different people feel them at different times. For instance some will get jealous at even the smallest things. Some almost never get jealous. Neither one is bad as long as they don't act on their jealousy in toxic ways.

Someone who only likes to be monogamous should never strive to be more non-monogomous. That's only causing themselves ***.

Every individual is different and every relationship is different. You should only strive to have the healthiest relationship for you. If that means be with one person that makes you happy, then that should be what you strive for.
If that means multiple partners in healthy relationships then that should be what you strive for.

[la****]

I think jealousy has very much to do with someone’s insecurities, which are also tight to past experiences. I tend to be jealous because I am not very self confident, so I tend to lack in trust and I ‘***’ competition from others. I think it is important to reach a good self understanding and learn how to manage this emotion in order not to hurt the others and yourself too.

[Deleted Member]

I think it’s natural to be jealous from time to time. It’s human nature.

It’s when one or the other partners feelings get hurt is when it becomes an issue.

[ne****]

I think some levels of jealousy are healthy. I want to know that there is a feeling of threat. That I’m just his and for no one else. As long as it’s not crazy like. I’m known to provoke some jealousy for fun. 🤷🏽‍♀️

[fo****]

We experience the opposite of jealousy in non monogamy. We experience compersion. I enjoy watching my partner with someone.

[th****]

Jealousy is a natural feeling. As to whether you should pursue to be in a more open relationship or not that’s something you should ask yourself and your partner. Don’t compromise on what you need to be happy though.

[la****]

Jealousy to a degree can be perfectly normal, but it can also turn into a unhealthy obsession for some. If you’re constantly questioning your partner’s loyalty then the trust is gone and so is the relationship. It’s time to move on.

[lo****]

Jealousy is natural. It is the degree in which it is felt and how one deals with it that is key. Start by examining WHY you feel that way. Are there needs you aren't getting met? Trauma from past relationships? Etc. Then, once you identify why, you can better communicate with your partner, and deal with it better.
Jealousy in itself is not bad, but it can become a monster.

[al****]

Felt it, hate it, won’t tolerate things that make me feel such anymore. My next gf won’t like girls on the side. F**k that shit

[Om****]

I definetly feel like it's natural and people learn it too

[Deleted Member]

Anyone whom isn’t naturally jealous probably has some personality disorder. That being said society definitely rein***s it.

We should be open to more non-monogamous relationships sure, but people should also educate themselves about them before jumping into them.

[Wo****]

Jealousy is more a mater of imaturity or insecurity. If one is comfortable in their relationship then there is no reason for jealousy. Monogamy is mostly cultural but not exclusively. As such non monogamous relations are prefered.

[je****]

I agree with Cage for Swallows comment very well written

[BruiseWayne]

In a relationship nobody should be doing anything to make their partner jealous in the first place, so no I don't think it's a good thing. It's also a shitty thing to use someone else to intentionally make your partner jealous. Even if that's something you like to do with each other pulling people into it unknowingly is tacky af and pretty toxic if you ask me.

 

Just being jealous of other people for various reasons is perfectly okay though.

 

MAKING your partner jealous outside of some kind of kink where all parties involved are informed and consenting is not.

 

 

Edited September 26, 2022 by BruiseWayne

[Am****]

If you trust someone then there's no jealousy.
If you can't say you trust your partner then what does that say about your relationship?
.
Just because my partner is being flirted with at the bar, doesn't mean that anything will happen

[ey****]

8 hours ago, AmstelDom said:

f you trust someone then there's no jealousy.
If you can't say you trust your partner then what does that say about your relationship?

the two aren't mutually exclusive.   you can trust someone and still be jealous.   But jealous isn't entirely a bad feeling, unless you make it one.  It is something that can be worked with both individually and as a couple - it is when the jealousy turns into controlling or demanding that it's a problem - and even then it's not so much trust but often "you've got another partner but I don't" when the demands come out, or possible insecurities ("one penis policy") which leads to hypocrisy.

 

[Deleted Member]

Jealousy is natural and I agree it’s all about how you deal with that jealousy - I admit I can be a jealous person but that is a me problem in most instances so I have to manage that.

I do share when I feel like that in a round about way but I do get embarrassed because I know that it’s silly behaviour most of the time and there is no foundation for it, it’s just how I feel!

I think if you can push yourself to be honest and be a little self-aware, seeing it for what it is, then that’s a good way forward. If you can have those conversations you will probably come away with the reassurance you need and feel much better - this is the case for me.

[Deleted Member]

It really depends on the people involved and what limits they have expressed for themselves in their relationship. I think it’s natural to have some jealousy, but it’s also the role of that person to combat and qualm those feelings.

[lo****]

Jealous season natural thing. It sucks but it's kind of like we can do control it

[ao****]

I don’t think it’s a bad thing. Only those who love/like you would feel jealous.

When I'm in love with someone, I get clingy and jealous. When I have someone as a pet, as long as his body is mine, I don't have time to be jealous. If I only have a crush on someone, any suspicious behavior of him will cause me to skip him and move on.

If you are not into polyamorous relationship, then say no.

A poly relationship would become out of balance if you love one person more than the other. Not to mention you feel jealousy

[bi****]

I personally think that is is natural human behaviour to be jealous.

[la****]

A certain level of jealousy is natural. But if it becomes obsessive then it becomes a problem. If you can’t trust ur partner then the relationship is already over. Communication and trust are the key to a successful relationship 

[Ro****]

On 9/17/2022 at 2:01 AM, makeMeslut said:

Is jealousy a bad thing? Is this taught through culture or is it natural (for some but not for others)? Should we pursue to be more open to non monogamous relationships?

wow, well, jealousy is love! I dont think is culture, it's a strong reaction of your subconscious mind. However, me personally I can be jealous or not and you know what? I prefer my life when jealousy doesn't come out!

[Th****]

Communication. Communication. Communication. A relationship is based on communication and mutual respect. If you are in the same page, who’s jealous?! Jealousy is normal and healthy to a certain extent. You just don’t want to cause your partner stress.