Things poser "Doms" have put me thru

[Ro****]

So very true.
A lot of people with mental problems and think, due to the pool being smaller, they’ll have more opportunities on a kink website/app than a straight one where they just get ignored.
But on the flip side you have to look at a different type, as the type you keep being attracted to ie tick your boxes, tend to be wrong-uns.
Good luck

[Deleted Member]

Thank you for shedding light on this important topic. I’m dominant and I still get plenty of wanna be “Doms” who don’t have a clue - either want to *** me switch or top me from the bottom… Was just talking to a friend about red flags to watch out for. Trust your instincts. Play should always be safe, sane, and consensual.

[ru****]

Your profile said you've never had a Dom IRL though. If that's the case, how has this happened? Do you just mean you haven't had a good Dom?

[ze****]

Scary story, will learn from this post a lot, appreciated. Also I hope you are recovering safely and soundly 🌹

[fi****]

I am sorry you went through thus. Many people who think that they are doms are in fact narcissists or control freaks. Fragile egos. There are good ones out there, and people like you sharing the benefit of your experience can only help fellow subs spot the red flags. So thank you.

[Ch****]

Totally unacceptable. You have 100 % right.

[Deleted Member]

Thanks for sharing your experiences

[ho****]

The safe word i use is FET most people from here agree with me. You won’t forget that. Im also more of a sensual dom. I want my women to enjoy and cum

[an****]

1. A sub can leave at any time. Only an abusive Dom would need to try to make restrictions.
2. A sub is not EVERY Dom’s sub.
3. Safe words should be mandatory for SAFETY. Don’t walk, run away.

These are all the bare basics. D/s 101. Doms need to be protecting subs, not exploiting them. That’s what the PE is all about. What the OP described is not a D/s relationship. It is just plain ***.

[Da****]

Sorry to hear about your bad experiences with horrible Doms. No safe words is a huge red flag -- dont walk away, RUN.

[Em****]

I dumped a guy like this just yesterday

[si****]

What a horrible story! Im sorry for The negative experiences you had to go through. Obviously there was no respect involved there, what a shame. I don’t know why people don’t understand that there’s a difference between a special relationship of Dom and a sub and just wanting rough sex. Any woman that honors me with the gift of control I consider to be one of the highest paid compliments and should not be taken lightly. Don’t let this turn you off because believe it or not there’s still amazing people out there🙂

[My****]

WoW

[Go****]

It’s similar being a Domme you’re online Experience . Alot of trying to Dom from the bottom. It gets annoying when vetting for New sub men. 

[ph****]

One thing I’ve done is create a collaring process that works for me. It starts with an interview process, then protection, followed by training, and then consideration. The interview process is the equivalent of “dating” but discussion of needs and wants are the top priority and probably accounts for 85% of time spent together.

This makes for good conversation as well as plenty of time to find out where the potentials head is at. I downplay BD and SM and really focus on the D/s dynamic. This usually weeds out people with qualities that I find other than what I’m looking for.

One thing I’ve learned over the years, you have to know what you’re looking for and you have to be as precise in what you’re looking for, self-aware enough that you can be honest within you before being honest with someone else.

Stay strong and really know what you’re looking for, that person is out there!

[Ex****]

I’ve experienced that dating in non-FET life. Be safe, and thank you for the heads up.

[kimutu72]

Im sorry to hear about your experience and I hope your well, there are alot of fakes out there but there are afew nice ones aswel, Im sure you will find the right one for you

[Su****]

I blocked someone on here for the same reason u did. He said the same thing “ be a good girl and help me cum “ SMFH

[El****]

So many fake doms these ways. I hate how regular uneducated people thinks that bdsm dom is about their satisfaction and them only. I once talked with a guy who was bragging on the forums that he had his sub sign a contract with her *** and that he's the best dom ever. I have met him once and couldn't stop laughing how pathetic he was. He had no idea how bdsm worked and did it to get a free lay and cool points within the community.

[sc****]

Submission is earned just like any good relationship you need to build trust and respect that special bond you will need to fully submit to someone. Without trust you have nothing be smart and play safe out there. A good dom knows to take you have to give

[Mon79]

18 hours ago, MzMel said:

Submission is a gift. Vet your partners. Go slow. Ask your partner what safety protocol they follow. If they don’t have one, move on.

Love this ❤️

[ze****]

I’m new to this and I like the insight I’m getting from you. I consider myself dom but had my doubts if a sun would consider me so. I love the act of submission to me and consider it a honor to be given it. My goal is and my talent is to get in your head and find out what drives you, what makes you crazy what satisfies you. The spankings the choking the bondage itself actually does little for me, those things are just tools to get you there. Most times I don’t even climax myself. There is nothing better than drain you sexually and leave you a quivering satisfied mess. Like I said I’m new to this but I think I like the dom aspects but am less interested in those that like to be degraded. I love women and though I might be able to rise to the occasion out of novelty for someone that wanted to be degraded it wouldn’t last long I think.

[ph****]

Those who think and act like that should not be Dom

[Deleted Member]

Sorry to read this as this shouldn’t be the new norm but when I head to forums for a read I feel like I see quite often. The world is predatory and vetting helps and also having a support system whether it be someone close to you or Fetish Community. Subs please be careful. Consent or bust.

[pa****]

that’s ***, not kink. f**k these mens. The desire to be cruel to a person isn’t domming. It’s bullying. I’m so sorry you had to go through this. And thank you for sharing.