Recent experience with a guy on here

[Deleted Member]

I met a guy on here. We clicked and our kinks were similar and we are close in location. Went over to his place a few times. He wasn’t able to stay hard and he blamed it on a side effect of a medication. Met 3 times and each time he wasn’t able to preform because of the medication. Yet I always took care of him and made sure he came, right afterwords he’d just lay there and say he’s exhausted and that he has work early the next morning. Each of the three times I left unsatisfied and felt like I was being used. Advice from the guys please, should I just block him and move on ?

[Deleted Member]

Be honest with him, communicate your thoughts and then block him :)

[Chadbiggs]

Definitely block.

[Deleted Member]

The tongue doesn't need to be hard ,at least he can take care of you like that...block him yes..

[NorseRhune]

You don't need selfish! State your piece and move on.

[Mr_Rune]

I mean air your concerns but if its just another selfish response I'd definitely move on. It's a pretty basic standard in sex to satisfy one another on some sort of level.

[CopperKnob]

At what point did we start being able to sleep with someone but stop being able to talk to them?
If you aren't feeling satisfied, did you communicate what you needed to be so?
If you did and you still felt like that then you either need to have that chat again or cash in your chips having told him that's what you're doing.
Blocking someone because you can't deal with a conversation yet you can share the details amongst strangers is, in my opinion, absolutely bizarre particularly when considering you suggest that they've a profile here and are likely to see this post and where there are no apparent safety concerns.
It seems like you know that blocking someone under these circumstances is a shitty thing to do, you simply want validation from others before you do it.

[ge****]

Whilst I sympathise with him *if* he couldn't get hard for the reasons stated and has been open and honest about it - I lose any of that sympathy for how he then behaved.
.
Intimacy and sexual pleasure go way beyond whether someone is able to perform or not - and yeah it can be difficult and embarrassing when as a guy you're unable to, but at the same time it doesn't mean pleasure can't be found for all concerned in other ways.
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It actually smacks of quite a selfish attitude that he behaved as you tell it.
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As for how you deal with it - that depends on how invested in this guy you are or want to be - if you're not at all, then moving on would seem the obvious answer, if in all other respects you have time for him, then an open and frank conversation is in order in which you tell him exactly how you feel and why things need to change - if he can't accept it then again move on.

[ca****]

3 minutes ago, CopperKnob said:

At what point did we start being able to sleep with someone but stop being able to talk to them?
If you aren't feeling satisfied, did you communicate what you needed to be so?
If you did and you still felt like that then you either need to have that chat again or cash in your chips having told him that's what you're doing.
Blocking someone because you can't deal with a conversation yet you can share the details amongst strangers is, in my opinion, absolutely bizarre particularly when considering you suggest that they've a profile here and are likely to see this post and where there are no apparent safety concerns.
It seems like you know that blocking someone under these circumstances is a shitty thing to do, you simply want validation from others before you do it.

Couldn't have put it better myself. Well ***y said 👏

[DeviantInside]

Your options basically fall into 4 categories.

You say nothing and keep going, accepting that things are unlikely to change.

You explain why it’s not working for you, what would help improve things and keep going to see if things change.

You explain why it’s not working for you and move on.

You say nothing and move on.

You have to decide for yourself which is going to be what’s best for you. No one else knows you, your life, him, what he’s like, what your interactions have been like, what the possible outcomes may be, what is important to you etc. Neither are you in control of what his reactions will be to any of that. So you have to focus on what is right for you and what you are comfortable doing/accepting:

[Deleted Member]

@copper I was actually straightforward with him when we originally met for drinks, told him it had been a few months since I last had sex so he knew I needed relief. After the first time meeting up and leaving upset he texted back immediately saying he would make it up to me and that next time would be all about me. Well guess what next time it wasn’t all about me, he turned it into all about himself, made sure I made him cum and then apologized that he couldn’t keep going because he was exhausted. I figured I’d give him another chance but that was probably a bad idea. Iv blocked him on here already so he wouldn’t be able to see my post. I wanted genuine advice from this community especially men who would give me insight on wether it sounds like he’s just toying me and plans on wasting my time. Wasn’t trying to attract a rude cunt that would make assumptions without knowing the whole story.

[DeviantInside]

I would add that as a general rule communication is incredibly important. And as a general rule we should always try to talk. However there will always be exceptions where it’s not viable, practical or could potentially be volatile etc.

[CopperKnob]

3 minutes ago, switchthingsup said:

@copper I was actually straightforward with him when we originally met for drinks, told him it had been a few months since I last had sex so he knew I needed relief. After the first time meeting up and leaving upset he texted back immediately saying he would make it up to me and that next time would be all about me. Well guess what next time it wasn’t all about me, he turned it into all about himself, made sure I made him cum and then apologized that he couldn’t keep going because he was exhausted. I figured I’d give him another chance but that was probably a bad idea. Iv blocked him on here already so he wouldn’t be able to see my post. I wanted genuine advice from this community especially men who would give me insight on wether it sounds like he’s just toying me and plans on wasting my time. Wasn’t trying to attract a rude cunt that would make assumptions without knowing the whole story.

@switching it up. Reported for inappropriate language and yeah, that's not how the block function works 🤷‍♀️

[Deleted Member]

@copper you’re actually super annoying. Fuck off, thanks

[bi****]

I always make sure we both happy as we part good manners for a start even if he can’t stay hard there was many ways to pleasure still so he sounds selfish and just using women I would say move on

[Da****]

11 minutes ago, switchthingsup said:

@copper you’re actually super annoying. Fuck off, thanks

Enough you asked for opinions and just because you may not agree with all of them doesn't mean you attack that person. A difference of opinion is not a personal attack.. as you can see here most people on here think and have asked the same questions.. have you communicated with him about where you are at and your needs since the first meeting... and if you see him again have him make you c*m first.. good luck

[GiiGorgeouss]

23 minutes ago, Daddy-n-Paddy said:

Enough you asked for opinions and just because you may not agree with all of them doesn't mean you attack that person. A difference of opinion is not a personal attack.. as you can see here most people on here think and have asked the same questions.. have you communicated with him about where you are at and your needs since the first meeting... and if you see him again have him make you c*m first.. good luck

Point is the woman named copper was in fact reaching and being a cunt… for no reason. Without knowing all the details… she could’ve easily stated her point without being annoying.

[Da****]

6 minutes ago, GiiGorgeouss said:

Point is the woman named copper was in fact reaching and being a cunt… for no reason. Without knowing all the details… she could’ve easily stated her point without being annoying.

maybe she was and maybe she wasn't...thats a difference of opinion but again no need to resort to the name calling and disrespect you both are showing her.. don't lime the answer then disregard it and move on..

[Da****]

7 minutes ago, GiiGorgeouss said:

Point is the woman named copper was in fact reaching and being a cunt… for no reason. Without knowing all the details… she could’ve easily stated her point without being annoying.

Plus if the OP had giving all the information in the beginning maybe the response would have been different..

[CopperKnob]

1 hour ago, Daddy-n-Paddy said:

Plus if the OP had giving all the information in the beginning maybe the response would have been different..

Honestly, the additional information wouldn't have altered my initial response, ghosting someone for any reason other than safety purposes is childish and hurtful. But, there's more to this post than first meets the eye, not least the fact that personal information has been shared about another member, in all likelihood without their consent.

[FETMOD-KF]

ok, enough. thanks all who kept it civil.