Ever get blocked for no reason?

[Deleted Member]

Just now, SeekerJ said:

Getting blocked or having your message deleted after the introductory message dies feel like a slap in the face. But remind yourself that the person is s total stranger and owes you nothing. No response is a response. Blocking prevents further messages. There are so many reasons why it happens. You can’t take it personal. Move on.

*does

[Fe****]

I did, he reached out to me here on this site, nice convo, moved forward to KIK as we both were local to the other. Great convo, and he invites me to meet him, I agree, he goes back and forth and agrees, then ghosted after I asked where I was meeting him, then he blocked me on this site, not sure about KIK but it is his prerogative so chalked up as fake/flake pic collector…moving on❣️💋

[miss_maya]

Happened to me many times, usually after they ask for a picture. Then they dissapear. Who knows why.

Edited March 11, 2023 by miss_maya

[kerri_kamden]

March 11, miss_maya said:

Happened to me many times, usually after they ask for a picture. Then they dissapear. Who knows why.

The irony here being that this account itself is now blocked lol

[Fe****]

YAY

[Go****]

Yup!

[De****]

December 9, 2022, CopperKnob said:

A genuine question,
Why is being blocked by someone who you don't know, who is literally a billion pixels on your screen such a big deal?
.
Actually, a second genuine question,
Why do you consider the person/people who blocked you to be
Intellectually challenged
Power crazed
Rude
Uncivil
Egotistical
(All statements made within this thread)

Well, I think that the first thing to keep in mind is that for some people their inbox will never see any activity if they don't send the first message.... Now if that person is shy or hesitant for whatever reason and selective about who they message, taking in whatever crumbs of info they can from sometimes a very scant profile, that message can sometimes represent quite an emotional investment so it being ignored or getting blocked then illicits an emotional response ...... Then when this happens repeatedly frustration can build.
Not trying to detract in any way from the harassment and *** some people suffer through.
I hope this goes some way towards answering your questions.

A genuine question to all
Why do you think some people lash out and get abusive in the first place?

[ge****]

57 minutes ago, eoinexploring said:

Well, I think that the first thing to keep in mind is that for some people their inbox will never see any activity if they don't send the first message.... Now if that person is shy or hesitant for whatever reason and selective about who they message, taking in whatever crumbs of info they can from sometimes a very scant profile, that message can sometimes represent quite an emotional investment so it being ignored or getting blocked then illicits an emotional response ...... Then when this happens repeatedly frustration can build.
Not trying to detract in any way from the harassment and *** some people suffer through.
I hope this goes some way towards answering your questions.

A genuine question to all
Why do you think some people lash out and get abusive in the first place?

Whilst I take your point about someone being shy or lacking confidence etc, and also that a lack of response might be frustrating for some, I'd also suggest that expecting a response shows a degree of entitlement and incorrectly set expectations on sites such as this.
.
Either way getting frustrated and throwing toys out of the pram, or worse still, sending *** is not going to help either.
.
In fact I often question why people continue to repeat sending messages if they find it frustrating to not get a response.
.
As to why people lash out and get abusive - because the anonymity of sitting behind a keyboard allows them to, but it's still not excused by their frustration and ultimately speaks volumes about them as a person really.

[CopperKnob]

1 hour ago, eoinexploring said:

Well, I think that the first thing to keep in mind is that for some people their inbox will never see any activity if they don't send the first message.... Now if that person is shy or hesitant for whatever reason and selective about who they message, taking in whatever crumbs of info they can from sometimes a very scant profile, that message can sometimes represent quite an emotional investment so it being ignored or getting blocked then illicits an emotional response ...... Then when this happens repeatedly frustration can build.
Not trying to detract in any way from the harassment and *** some people suffer through.
I hope this goes some way towards answering your questions.

A genuine question to all
Why do you think some people lash out and get abusive in the first place?

"Taking in whatever crumbs of info they can from sometimes a very scant profile" isn't "being selective about who they message"
.
To answer your question - because they have and underlying sense of entitlement "I've scoured your profile, taken the time to put together a message to you when you've offered nothing but crumbs, do you not know the amount of enotional labour involved in doing so and now you've blocked me!"
Some people, having written such a message don't want polite conversation or interactions. They meet compliments with deprecation, advice is perceived as a personal slight. Trying to be nice to these individuals simply makes them angrier. Because being nice without having sex with them is "leading them on" and there is not a single greater sin a woman can commit than leading a man on. They see us as a waste of resources unless we are attached to them by the dick. By "leading them on" we've wasted their precious time and resources.
In response to this, some will throw a pity party and cry about how "women are so mean!" But it's ridiculous to expect women to disregard their own safety and boundaries because some manbaby, who has already decided any woman not having sex with him is evil, might have hurt feelings.
And if some of you don't believe this happens in inboxes, all you need to do is check out every thread ever started by an individual asking questions such as this OP

[Deleted Member]

7 minutes ago, gemini_man said:

Whilst I take your point about someone being shy or lacking confidence etc, and also that a lack of response might be frustrating for some, I'd also suggest that expecting a response shows a degree of entitlement and incorrectly set expectations on sites such as this.
.
Either way getting frustrated and throwing toys out of the pram, or worse still, sending *** is not going to help either.
.
In fact I often question why people continue to repeat sending messages if they find it frustrating to not get a response.
.
As to why people lash out and get abusive - because the anonymity of sitting behind a keyboard allows them to, but it's still not excused by their frustration and ultimately speaks volumes about them as a person really.

Yeah, I agree... why send out messages if they find it frustrating not to get a response aka Entitlement!👏👏👏👏👏

[Deleted Member]

For some people, it’s not about entitlement. Shy, sensitive people are mostly genuine. I can only speak for myself, but if someone messages me, I will always respond at first. What happens after that depends, but an introductory message is just that. Basic human interaction. Is no response not a form of entitlement? 

[De****]

2 hours ago, gemini_man said:

Whilst I take your point about someone being shy or lacking confidence etc, and also that a lack of response might be frustrating for some, I'd also suggest that expecting a response shows a degree of entitlement and incorrectly set expectations on sites such as this.
.
Either way getting frustrated and throwing toys out of the pram, or worse still, sending *** is not going to help either.
.
In fact I often question why people continue to repeat sending messages if they find it frustrating to not get a response.
.
As to why people lash out and get abusive - because the anonymity of sitting behind a keyboard allows them to, but it's still not excused by their frustration and ultimately speaks volumes about them as a person really.

I don't think expecting a response to a message shows a sense of entitlement nesessarily but I think you hit the nail on the head with it being an incorrect set of expectations....or maybe yuor right, in some cases I'm sure you are and it is entitlement, for me it took a bit to realise the dichotic nature of how people behave online versus irl.......and I've very lucky that I've never had to deal with the *** and harassment some people have to deal with......and I'd go further to say 'throwing toys out the pram' is activily harmful, I feel you'd agree.

As to the people lashing out I think as with most things it's more complicated than that, the anonymity makes them feel safe lashing out for sure, but it's not the why !

 

[De****]

2 hours ago, CopperKnob said:

"Taking in whatever crumbs of info they can from sometimes a very scant profile" isn't "being selective about who they message"
.
To answer your question - because they have and underlying sense of entitlement "I've scoured your profile, taken the time to put together a message to you when you've offered nothing but crumbs, do you not know the amount of enotional labour involved in doing so and now you've blocked me!"
Some people, having written such a message don't want polite conversation or interactions. They meet compliments with deprecation, advice is perceived as a personal slight. Trying to be nice to these individuals simply makes them angrier. Because being nice without having sex with them is "leading them on" and there is not a single greater sin a woman can commit than leading a man on. They see us as a waste of resources unless we are attached to them by the dick. By "leading them on" we've wasted their precious time and resources.
In response to this, some will throw a pity party and cry about how "women are so mean!" But it's ridiculous to expect women to disregard their own safety and boundaries because some manbaby, who has already decided any woman not having sex with him is evil, might have hurt feelings.
And if some of you don't believe this happens in inboxes, all you need to do is check out every thread ever started by an individual asking questions such as this OP

maybe 'scant crumbs of info.....' was a poor choice of words but I feel it's a bit harsh to dismiss my whole answer for that.

I seem to have struck a nerve with you though and for that I apologise. It was not my intention to give the impression I was defending any abusive or unwanted attention people send to others. I was trying to answer a 'genuine question'

[De****]

2 hours ago, seonny said:

Yeah, I agree... why send out messages if they find it frustrating not to get a response aka Entitlement!👏👏👏👏👏

I agree that sometimes it is, but to assume that it always is, is to drastically underestimate the variety of possible human responses to any given situation

[ge****]

45 minutes ago, eoinexploring said:

I don't think expecting a response to a message shows a sense of entitlement nesessarily but I think you hit the nail on the head with it being an incorrect set of expectations....or maybe yuor right, in some cases I'm sure you are and it is entitlement, for me it took a bit to realise the dichotic nature of how people behave online versus irl.......and I've very lucky that I've never had to deal with the *** and harassment some people have to deal with......and I'd go further to say 'throwing toys out the pram' is activily harmful, I feel you'd agree.

As to the people lashing out I think as with most things it's more complicated than that, the anonymity makes them feel safe lashing out for sure, but it's not the why !

 

Oh for sure the anonymity is an enabler rather than a reason as such but is also a "why" in the sense that it allows people to behave in a way they wouldn't in person.
.
Why people do so, again comes back to entitlement and expectations - they feel they're owed a response and when they don't get one, or in some cases when they do get one but it's not the response they wanted, lash out almost as a means of blaming anything but themselves for their lack of "success"

[ge****]

53 minutes ago, SeekerJ said:

For some people, it’s not about entitlement. Shy, sensitive people are mostly genuine. I can only speak for myself, but if someone messages me, I will always respond at first. What happens after that depends, but an introductory message is just that. Basic human interaction. Is no response not a form of entitlement? 

Not responding to a message that wasn't specifically requested in the first place is not in the slightest bit entitled - in most cases it's self-protection to avoid the potential *** that may follow from a polite rejection

[ey****]

6 hours ago, eoinexploring said:

A genuine question to all
Why do you think some people lash out and get abusive in the first place?

if someone is going to lash out and get abusive when they don't get their own way then you see why no one would want a relationship with them?

[De****]

1 hour ago, eyemblacksheep said:

if someone is going to lash out and get abusive when they don't get their own way then you see why no one would want a relationship with them?

Of course I do, I believe the only relationship they should be in is with a therapist

[Deleted Member]

3 hours ago, gemini_man said:

Not responding to a message that wasn't specifically requested in the first place is not in the slightest bit entitled - in most cases it's self-protection to avoid the potential *** that may follow from a polite rejection

Not everyone is abusive. 

[De****]

3 hours ago, gemini_man said:

Oh for sure the anonymity is an enabler rather than a reason as such but is also a "why" in the sense that it allows people to behave in a way they wouldn't in person.
.
Why people do so, again comes back to entitlement and expectations - they feel they're owed a response and when they don't get one, or in some cases when they do get one but it's not the response they wanted, lash out almost as a means of blaming anything but themselves for their lack of "success"

In a way I envy your certainty, it's entitlement and expectations, tie that off, nice and neat..... But I can't help feel that's a characterisation of behavior rather than an explanation for, if you get what I mean. There's underlying mental health issues there I think...... but anyway I'm not here to change anyone's opinions and I'm tired....
Oh, just to clarify ( to anybody caring to read ) if I've been unclear I want to state that I f**king hate that anyone has to put up with any kind of *** or unwanted attention in the pursuit of a relationship and I hate the people responsible for said *** and harassment for the effect they have on their direct victims and the *** and inhibitions they illicit in their secondary victims

[ge****]

6 minutes ago, SeekerJ said:

Not everyone is abusive. 

Not at all, and no-one is suggesting they are - however it happens often enough for people to feel they have to protect themselves from the potential for *** by not responding to any messages they choose not to.
.
It's impossible to know if someone will accept a rejection gracefully or turn abusive so not responding is often the best way to avoid the potential for the latter.

[ge****]

18 minutes ago, eoinexploring said:

In a way I envy your certainty, it's entitlement and expectations, tie that off, nice and neat..... But I can't help feel that's a characterisation of behavior rather than an explanation for, if you get what I mean. There's underlying mental health issues there I think...... but anyway I'm not here to change anyone's opinions and I'm tired....
Oh, just to clarify ( to anybody caring to read ) if I've been unclear I want to state that I f**king hate that anyone has to put up with any kind of *** or unwanted attention in the pursuit of a relationship and I hate the people responsible for said *** and harassment for the effect they have on their direct victims and the *** and inhibitions they illicit in their secondary victims

Oh I get what you mean for sure and it's an interesting topic and not one I was trying to close down by making it seem nice and neat - though I do think a lot of the time it does simply come down to those two things but acknowledge there may be "deeper" reasons that have led them to feel entitled or have incorrect expectations.
.
I'm not sure it's mental health issues either - not in the majority of cases anyway. It actually shocked me when I first started using sites like this in a so called "enlightened" age, how much misogyny still exists for example.

Then I think there's also the thing that porn is so freely available on the net these days, that many see sites like this as a "porn" site and therefore equate other users, either consciously or sub-conciously, to those they see in porn who are seemingly always "up for it" and therefore must be available, and lose sight of the fact that porn is so far removed from reality, along with losing sight of the values of respect and consideration along the way.
.
Either way it all feeds into a sense of entitlement and false expectations amongst many men on sites like this, not all of whom are abusive etc, but there are enough who are for it to be an issue and a reason many women don't respond to every message or who do block for seemingly no reason etc

[Da****]

The only time I use the BLOCK button is with dangerous or very rude posters. Some members use it a little more liberally.

You absolutely have to have a thick skin when on the internet. Especially when chatting, dating or having any type of personal relations.

When you are first interested in someone its good and cool to get excited. However, its best to stay calm and measured so you can see how a person acts when chatting and/or meeting in person. You want to see a potential partner with as much clarity as you can.

 

[Da****]

Quote

some will throw a pity party and cry about how "women are so mean!" But it's ridiculous to expect women to disregard their own safety and boundaries because some manbaby, who has already decided any woman not having sex with him is evil, might have hurt feelings.
And if some of you don't believe this happens in inboxes, all you need to do is check out every thread ever started by an individual asking questions such as this OP

I agree completely with what CopperKnob is saying here.

Women have to take safety precautions, we don't know if you are a safe male from the beginning of knowing you. I'm not willing to risk my personal boundaries or safety because a male expressed interest, then got all butthurt because I wouldn't come over to his house on the first meeting. I've had a man judge me for doing this and then say he wouldn't respect a woman who had sex with him on their first meeting. I believe he called women who do this sluts. So we can't win with some men either way.

If you saw my inbox on how many men text me and say "Hey baby, let's party & have sex" or something even more derogatory in nature, you might just understand why I have deleted messages and blocked certain men. Certain men feel *** is the answer for their frustration with women. They rarely look inward in why women refuse to engage with them. A little self reflection would help. I don't want to bother with the misogyny, rudeness and downright crude language & nasty attitude. Life is short & I don't have to deal with certain men's crap, period!!!!

So yeah, BLOCK is a friend to many members. It's why I don't post a face picture either. I don't know if a visitor to Vegas or a native may decide to exact his vengeance on me, for the wrongs life has imposed upon him.