Wall flies

[VK****]

To be able to post on a ladies wall, you need to be a Premium or VIP member. That means they already have 300-500 icebreakers per month. Yet I see certain people posting the usual inane "Message me" on pretty every woman's Wall. It's exceedingly desperate, yet I suppose some women who are new arrivals may be tempted to reply. Suggest the Icebreakers limit should apply to Wall postings too. Thoughts?

[Lord_Talion]

Posting on a wall to be messaged is the way of an ubber-dom. They got no balls

[VK****]

15 minutes ago, Lord_Talion said:

Posting on a wall to be messaged is the way of an ubber-dom. They got no balls

Unter Dom. Desperate.

[CopperKnob]

I think that there's a misunderstanding that those paying are better behaved. It's not necessarily true
But, to be honest, if those individuals want to make those comments they'll do it anywhere, walls, DM's, photo comments, on forum posts and I'm assuming chat.restricting access to wall comments won't change the situation
Education will

[VK****]

37 minutes ago, CopperKnob said:

I think that there's a misunderstanding that those paying are better behaved. It's not necessarily true
But, to be honest, if those individuals want to make those comments they'll do it anywhere, walls, DM's, photo comments, on forum posts and I'm assuming chat.restricting access to wall comments won't change the situation
Education will

How about an option to clear fly shit off your Wall then CK? I appreciate it's probably not something you come across too often on your journey through the male options here, but my am I fed up of G*82, E*bs, P*g and others with their asinine graffiti everywhere. 

[CopperKnob]

20 minutes ago, VKD said:

How about an option to clear fly shit off your Wall then CK? I appreciate it's probably not something you come across too often on your journey through the male options here, but my am I fed up of G*82, E*bs, P*g and others with their asinine graffiti everywhere. 

Does Fet have a spotting rule in their TOU's? You may want to edit your comment if so
A delete button if not already present on walls would be useful (I think it may exist) though, I prefer to keep those just so others can see them

[ge****]

Thing is if they're able to post on walls/pics they're already Premium or VIP members and have the "privilege" as a result of increased icebreakers and being able to post there etc - so limiting wall postings in the same way as icebreakers won't change a great deal as they'll still use up their limit and just wait for it to reset - sure it might be less but it'll still happen.
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Plus by doing so you penalise those who don't use it badly.
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I'm with CK in that education is the way - would also question how much credit you are giving to those targeted not to see it's just a lame attempt at getting attention. Would think the vast majority of ladies and indeed users would be able to see it for exactly what it is.

[VK****]

Gem!! Good to see you again. Thanks for pitching in. The problem is that that "the vast majority of ladies" are being shat on. I kid you not. So they've blown their 300/500 icebreakers...per month..and then defacte onwards. I'm sure there is a word for it. Thing is, having 'smeared' yourself to that level and still not scored, in a month, why do you carry on, for years. I know they are not scammers, but the pitch is pitiful. The ballon/fart/hypnosis lads seem to have backed off, the professor is still around. We're talking thousands, a month, I suspect, after 100s of Icebreakers. I get that this is a Fetish site, but maybe it should not indulge folks with "insanemessaginginphilia" to put a name on it. 

[CopperKnob]

8 minutes ago, VKD said:

Gem!! Good to see you again. Thanks for pitching in. The problem is that that "the vast majority of ladies" are being shat on. I kid you not. So they've blown their 300/500 icebreakers...per month..and then defacte onwards. I'm sure there is a word for it. Thing is, having 'smeared' yourself to that level and still not scored, in a month, why do you carry on, for years. I know they are not scammers, but the pitch is pitiful. The ballon/fart/hypnosis lads seem to have backed off, the professor is still around. We're talking thousands, a month, I suspect, after 100s of Icebreakers. I get that this is a Fetish site, but maybe it should not indulge folks with "insanemessaginginphilia" to put a name on it. 

The thing is, us ladies are not unaccustomed to online misogyny. Does that make it right, absolutely not. But, until there are global definitions of what that looks like, until there is global legislation to prevent it and until there is the education and support systems in place to reframe the thinking of these individuals, regardless as to what any social media platform does to make its site safer for all genders these individuals will find a way to circumvent the protective factors
You've said it yourself, they use the icebreakers and then move to wall/photo comments whilst waiting for their limits to reset.
And, let's be honest, it's not just males who do this, I see inappropriate comments by women on the photo's of male profiles
We don't need change on a micro level. If we're to feel safe, we need it on a macro level and that only comes from agencies/govts. Lobbying Fet for change will only get us so far, this needs to be in the political arena

[ge****]

I don't disagree that there are users out there that do such things, always have been and always will sadly but do think they're a minority that go to the extremes you suggest, and would disagree that it's a case of the good ladies of Fet being "shat on" - ultimately that minority that go to those extremes are actually "shitting on" themselves by what they do, as it is noticed not only by you but their targets I am sure.
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As such I think you're taking a sledgehammer to crack a nut being honest, and in doing so penalising the majority of well behaved paying members.
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I understand what you're saying and agree their behaviours are unnecessary, and unwanted, but is a momentary fly in the ointment, that is easily ignored and causes only minor irritation I would expect.

[VK****]

2 minutes ago, gemini_man said:

I don't disagree that there are users out there that do such things, always have been and always will sadly but do think they're a minority that go to the extremes you suggest, and would disagree that it's a case of the good ladies of Fet being "shat on" - ultimately that minority that go to those extremes are actually "shitting on" themselves by what they do, as it is noticed not only by you but their targets I am sure.
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As such I think you're taking a sledgehammer to crack a nut being honest, and in doing so penalising the majority of well behaved paying members.
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I understand what you're saying and agree their behaviours are unnecessary, and unwanted, but is a momentary fly in the ointment, that is easily ignored and causes only minor irritation I would expect.

But.. how does "penalising the majority of well behaved paying members." equate to stopping a few imbeciles with a gattling gun posting inanities everywhere? 300-500 Icebreakers..per month then the 1000s of "Message me", per month, on top. Everyone else is extremely comfortable I expect.

[VK****]

14 minutes ago, CopperKnob said:

The thing is, us ladies are not unaccustomed to online misogyny. Does that make it right, absolutely not. But, until there are global definitions of what that looks like, until there is global legislation to prevent it and until there is the education and support systems in place to reframe the thinking of these individuals, regardless as to what any social media platform does to make its site safer for all genders these individuals will find a way to circumvent the protective factors
You've said it yourself, they use the icebreakers and then move to wall/photo comments whilst waiting for their limits to reset.
And, let's be honest, it's not just males who do this, I see inappropriate comments by women on the photo's of male profiles
We don't need change on a micro level. If we're to feel safe, we need it on a macro level and that only comes from agencies/govts. Lobbying Fet for change will only get us so far, this needs to be in the political arena

Society tends to shift incremetally CK. You have to chip away at the shittiness, unfortunately. I totally agree with your long term aim, but it won't be one big leap, ever. A difficult journey. Like my pathetic whine about deleted members! 

[CopperKnob]

16 minutes ago, gemini_man said:

I don't disagree that there are users out there that do such things, always have been and always will sadly but do think they're a minority that go to the extremes you suggest, and would disagree that it's a case of the good ladies of Fet being "shat on" - ultimately that minority that go to those extremes are actually "shitting on" themselves by what they do, as it is noticed not only by you but their targets I am sure.
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As such I think you're taking a sledgehammer to crack a nut being honest, and in doing so penalising the majority of well behaved paying members.
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I understand what you're saying and agree their behaviours are unnecessary, and unwanted, but is a momentary fly in the ointment, that is easily ignored and causes only minor irritation I would expect.

I think you're right in that fortunately few will go on to more extreme behaviour however, online *** does equate to real life ***.
The other point is that often, those comments are made because the commenter is angry, generally with life and that anger is often directed at women. The same women that then don't respond or, if they do, it's a 'rejection' of some description and so, for those men it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy. They find likeminded men in online communities and from there it escalates. Theres a reason why incels are now seen as a terrorist group

[ge****]

17 minutes ago, CopperKnob said:

I think you're right in that fortunately few will go on to more extreme behaviour however, online *** does equate to real life ***.
The other point is that often, those comments are made because the commenter is angry, generally with life and that anger is often directed at women. The same women that then don't respond or, if they do, it's a 'rejection' of some description and so, for those men it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy. They find likeminded men in online communities and from there it escalates. Theres a reason why incels are now seen as a terrorist group

Oh trust me CK I'm not suggesting that's not the case or even suggesting "ignore it and it'll go away" - am fully aware of the dangers of not addressing some of these behaviours - am just not sure that the way being suggested in this thread is the right way to go about it.

[CopperKnob]

5 minutes ago, gemini_man said:

Oh trust me CK I'm not suggesting that's not the case or even suggesting "ignore it and it'll go away" - am fully aware of the dangers of not addressing some of these behaviours - am just not sure that the way being suggested in this thread is the right way to go about it.

Yep, ignoring it, isn't the answer which is all the suggestion here will achieve. By the time we'd use a delete button, we've already read and processed the comment. It's just another way of sweeping it under the carpet

[ge****]

30 minutes ago, VKD said:

But.. how does "penalising the majority of well behaved paying members." equate to stopping a few imbeciles with a gattling gun posting inanities everywhere? 300-500 Icebreakers..per month then the 1000s of "Message me", per month, on top. Everyone else is extremely comfortable I expect.

Because you're effectively taking away the privilege afforded to all paying members by taking it away for the few imbeciles - and in doing so won't actually address their behaviour as they'll still find other avenues to exhibit it.
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Sure the majority of members, paying or not, probably don't come close to their icebreaker limits or post heaps of comments on others' walls - but just as there are a minority that do exceed those limits for the bad, it's possible there are those who genuinely use them in a positive way.
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In fact wasn't it yourself who not that long ago said you use your message limit every month as a means of sending "educational" messages to new members?

[VK****]

1 minute ago, gemini_man said:

Because you're effectively taking away the privilege afforded to all paying members by taking it away for the few imbeciles - and in doing so won't actually address their behaviour as they'll still find other avenues to exhibit it.
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Sure the majority of members, paying or not, probably don't come close to their icebreaker limits or post heaps of comments on others' walls - but just as there are a minority that do exceed those limits for the bad, it's possible there are those who genuinely use them in a positive way.
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In fact wasn't it yourself who not that long ago said you use your message limit every month as a means of sending "educational" messages to new members?

Oooh! Low blow. That was as a freebie. 100 icebreakers per month, 3 per day..ish. Thing is, as a crowned overlord I can now see UK newcomers so don't even need the 100, but don't make so many friends in the US as I did. 

"it's possible there are those who genuinely use them in a positive way."

I have seen no examples of that other than maybe AmstelDom (vague guess, because his message is 'positive and virtuous') 

This thread may well wither on the vine, or other folks will pile in saying how tedious it is to see the same dross everywhere. 

[ge****]

20 minutes ago, VKD said:

Oooh! Low blow. That was as a freebie. 100 icebreakers per month, 3 per day..ish. Thing is, as a crowned overlord I can now see UK newcomers so don't even need the 100, but don't make so many friends in the US as I did. 

"it's possible there are those who genuinely use them in a positive way."

I have seen no examples of that other than maybe AmstelDom (vague guess, because his message is 'positive and virtuous') 

This thread may well wither on the vine, or other folks will pile in saying how tedious it is to see the same dross everywhere. 

Not a low blow at all - wasn't a dig, but an example of how people may seek to use the likes of icebreakers in a positive way - and limiting those regardless of whether to paid or free members as a by product of limiting those who use them negatively would not be fair.
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And don't get me wrong, I don't disagree that we'd all rather nor see the dross - I just don't think your suggestion would actually stop it, or even limit it.

[VK****]

Well with the help of a Sub friend, I've posted an anodyne comment on her Pic. I didn't have to on her Wall because another infamous imbecile with "three chubby Subs" had already left his mark. Thing is, like too many folks here, she wasn't even aware it was there. Thankfully she was able to remove both, so the removal facility is there, the knowledge of the post seemingly less so.