ge**** Posted March 27, 2023 Posted March 27, 2023 55 minutes ago, tinybaby said: Yes I am only looking for advice not a new Dom I am not " moaning" about him. Thank you to everyone who has spoken with kind words ☺️ he says that he sometimes forgets what we have discussed as he suffers from ADHD but he will try his best. Perhaps work out a series of signals that will serve as a reminder to him if that's the case, or even little phrases that indicate to him you want him to step it up a little. . Now with that comes a danger of "topping from the bottom" but if you're both agreeable to it, that shouldn't matter. . You've not defined what specifically you mean by craving more "rules", "discipline" and "sternness" so it may depend on that - but a simple phrase like "Oh Sir I've been very bad and need to be disciplined" might do the trick, I know it sounds clichéd, but in your instance may actually work. . Or if for instance during impact play you want it a little harder, perhaps a simple colour coded signal would work - you saying green meaning you want more or harder, amber for it's about right and red for stop it's gone too hard
Deleted Member Posted March 27, 2023 Posted March 27, 2023 Just sharing empathy here. I 100% feel you on this. I feel like I’m begging. I think my Dom likes it. 🤭 But nonetheless, I would appreciate more physical touch.
Deleted Member Posted March 27, 2023 Posted March 27, 2023 1 hour ago, tinybaby said: Yes I am only looking for advice not a new Dom I am not " moaning" about him. Thank you to everyone who has spoken with kind words ☺️ he says that he sometimes forgets what we have discussed as he suffers from ADHD but he will try his best. I have Autism & sometimes I can struggle to recall finer/specific details of things I've discussed, so I make regular notes & lists to help remind myself & to aid in the planning of future sessions, so I can deliver what is wanted/needed by a sub & prevent my poor memory from interfering with ensuring my subs fulfillment. I use the notes app on my phone &/or write them down on a notepad, so I have different sources to refer to.
Deleted Member Posted March 27, 2023 Posted March 27, 2023 If he’s not being attentive, excuses or not, when they care, they care to care. That simple. Hopefully he tries harder
CopperKnob Posted March 27, 2023 Posted March 27, 2023 2 hours ago, tys10304 said: If he’s not being attentive, excuses or not, when they care, they care to care. That simple. Hopefully he tries harder That's simply not true if someone's neurodiverse
Deleted Member Posted March 27, 2023 Posted March 27, 2023 After you explain to him what you want ask him to show his understanding by explaining what he understands what you are asking of him. When the two match - he might have understood. Take it easy and pull him up - stop- then explain where he doesn’t seem to have understood. Start again.
Deleted Member Posted March 27, 2023 Posted March 27, 2023 Then think if he can cut it or not, and rethink your duty to yourself!
Deleted Member Posted March 28, 2023 Posted March 28, 2023 You said you talked about it, but you still want more.....did he increase the attention he gave you after that first discussion? If so, then just revisit the conversation. If he did change what he was doing, he'll care enough to listen again. If he didn't, to be honest, it's not a good sign. But there is one thing I like to do that can provide a little incentive. I like to incorporate a few rules for myself, usually focused on my little one's needs, and they'll correspond/mirror her rules in some way. The best way to think about it is, if I make her happy, then she makes me happy. It's not a guarantee, but I can say that I've never lacked motivation to make sure my baby's satisfied. Good luck sweetie. I hope you get what you need soon.
Deleted Member Posted March 28, 2023 Posted March 28, 2023 4 hours ago, CopperKnob said: That's simply not true if someone's neurodiverse I didn’t read about that one off situation here.
Ja**** Posted March 29, 2023 Posted March 29, 2023 Only you and your dom know if he is giving you the attention that you discussed and agreed to. Is your desire for more attention, sternness, etc., in balance with what he agreed to provide? You said you have spoken to him a lot and still feel like you need more. Can his schedule support it? Or are there other reasonable limits or boundaries at play here? I recommend you talk to him outside of play and make it clear that you need more and be specific about it. If he doesn’t respond to your requests then maybe it’s time to break it off and find a new dom. Good luck!
Pe**** Posted March 29, 2023 Posted March 29, 2023 You seem to have an inexperienced Dom/lover if this is the case. Communication and levels of desires are important too if both are to compliment eachother. Speak again and if you feel your not getting what you desire and need in mind and body, then time to move to explore for experience and deeper understanding of your needs x
ze**** Posted March 30, 2023 Posted March 30, 2023 If you have good communication with your Dom let him know of your feelings and your frustration you should not keep it to yourself. You can add some new activities that might help to bridge the gap
ch**** Posted March 30, 2023 Posted March 30, 2023 Do not fall for a word she is saying coz u don't kno what the truth is. She cud be lying to seek attention or maybe from what u guys are recommending cud even use it as an excuse to dump the dom. A coin always has 2 sides so jus coz she is a woman do not favor her or take sides. I've been a victim of such fake women who do one thing in front of u and act completely different on social media.
CopperKnob Posted March 31, 2023 Posted March 31, 2023 1 hour ago, charlieboicr7 said: Do not fall for a word she is saying coz u don't kno what the truth is. She cud be lying to seek attention or maybe from what u guys are recommending cud even use it as an excuse to dump the dom. A coin always has 2 sides so jus coz she is a woman do not favor her or take sides. I've been a victim of such fake women who do one thing in front of u and act completely different on social media. How does someone fake being a women?
ch**** Posted March 31, 2023 Posted March 31, 2023 @CopperKnob - When did i say anyone is faking being a woman?
4R**** Posted March 31, 2023 Posted March 31, 2023 2 hours ago, charlieboicr7 said: @CopperKnob - When did i say anyone is faking being a woman? You used the phrase "Fake Women" - seems pretty clear to me.
CopperKnob Posted March 31, 2023 Posted March 31, 2023 5 hours ago, CopperKnob said: How does someone fake being a women? In your particularly misogynistic comment you stated "I've been a victim of such fake women"
ge**** Posted March 31, 2023 Posted March 31, 2023 7 hours ago, charlieboicr7 said: Do not fall for a word she is saying coz u don't kno what the truth is. She cud be lying to seek attention or maybe from what u guys are recommending cud even use it as an excuse to dump the dom. A coin always has 2 sides so jus coz she is a woman do not favor her or take sides. I've been a victim of such fake women who do one thing in front of u and act completely different on social media. Whilst it's true there may be two sides to every story - in this instance the OP is providing an insight into how *she* feels and *her* take on *her* experience and looking for advice from that perspective. . Why would we have reason to doubt *her* feelings? . Besides which her OP reads as fairly genuine as does her further input to the thread, none of which have given any reason to doubt her. . You could say the same thing about just about *any* post on an Internet forum where you only have the posters words to go on - so have to take them at face value unless it's obvious it's attention seeking or very one sided, which in this case I don't believe it is
ch**** Posted March 31, 2023 Posted March 31, 2023 3 hours ago, CopperKnob said: In your particularly misogynistic comment you stated "I've been a victim of such fake women" I have absolutely no clue what u are even talking and before you take a swipe at me just stand back. U have no idea what i have been through so like how u have the right to make an opinion so do i. Keep it to that and don't attack someone u don't even know
ch**** Posted March 31, 2023 Posted March 31, 2023 5 hours ago, 4RCH said: You used the phrase "Fake Women" - seems pretty clear to me. Good for u then
CopperKnob Posted March 31, 2023 Posted March 31, 2023 7 hours ago, charlieboicr7 said: I have absolutely no clue what u are even talking and before you take a swipe at me just stand back. U have no idea what i have been through so like how u have the right to make an opinion so do i. Keep it to that and don't attack someone u don't even know That's right I don't but, you may want to think about taking your own advice and not throw stones from glass house's
ch**** Posted April 1, 2023 Posted April 1, 2023 8 hours ago, CopperKnob said: That's right I don't but, you may want to think about taking your own advice and not throw stones from glass house's Again not sure what that meant but whatever keeps u happy
4R**** Posted April 1, 2023 Posted April 1, 2023 20 hours ago, charlieboicr7 said: Good for u then Hey, it was your error, I was just answering your question. No need to be nasty!
ch**** Posted April 1, 2023 Posted April 1, 2023 4 hours ago, 4RCH said: Hey, it was your error, I was just answering your question. No need to be nasty! I wasn't so let's not play the guilt trip here
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