What should I do?

[Deleted Member]

You got what you wanted. You men who think women are just kink dispensers and you don’t have to invest your time and yourself into a real relationship prefer to pay for a fake relationship. What do you expect? You think she should be your kink dispenser for free?? If you gave her more than you should have then that’s on you. Perhaps you have an addiction? Perhaps you need to learn *** management? Either way you shouldn’t be blaming her for the transactional relationship you wanted.

[Fartlover-8278]

Exactly

[Deleted Member]

If you take away the kink eliment & look at this situation from a normal dating point of view, if someone you met online said if you give me *** I may give you my contact details & then you chat & they said well if you want to keep talking to me I want more ***, if you want me to even consider going on a date then I want a steady flow of *** from you while I consider if I want to go for a date but it might take me 6,12,18 months to make my decision & if you say anything I don't like at any time then I want more ***...

You'd be telling them to phook right off & people need to keep that logic in mind when it comes to kink relationships, unless your kink is being a paypig, that you want to be to be used & humiliated financially, then you should be telling them to phook right off too

[Bo****]

I’m sorry but no one has been scammed here. You paid for what you wanted, got what you wanted and now that you can’t pay you can’t get. This is not complicated this is just trade.

[Deleted Member]

Don’t pay people tribute it not a kink it’s a scam

[do****]

🤣😂🤣 @rugby753

[d3****]

Easy stop sending *** to people over the internet ….. unless you plan on being broke

[ge****]

11 minutes ago, Bostonbrand said:

I’m sorry but no one has been scammed here. You paid for what you wanted, got what you wanted and now that you can’t pay you can’t get. This is not complicated this is just trade.

Whilst I agree the OP has a fair degree of responsibility for the situation he found/finds himself in, I also think he was being very cleverly played by this "Mistress" with what were obviously false promises and dangled carrots offered for no other purpose than to persuade him to hand over more ***.
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Now whilst you might say "more the fool him", (and being very blunt I'd not disagree with you) it is undeniably also a scam to play someone like that.

[ge****]

53 minutes ago, zerothewerid said:

Don’t pay people tribute it not a kink it’s a scam

For some it is actually a kink - that's pretty much how the whole FinDom/pay pig thing works - some guys get a kick out of purely spending *** on Dommes and it's definitely not a scam when both parties have their eyes open and are fully aware of what they are doing.
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However there is a very fine line between that and people taking advantage of others for financial gain in a duplicitous way which appears to have been the case here to a greater or lesser degree, although the OP has been somewhat naive at the same time.

[Deleted Member]

You could go to the police, although it was willingly done I doubt they will be able to do anything…could be wrong. Speak to the bank and see what they say? Although could being you a lot of personal embarrassment.

[ge****]

6 minutes ago, green11play said:

You could go to the police, although it was willingly done I doubt they will be able to do anything…could be wrong. Speak to the bank and see what they say? Although could being you a lot of personal embarrassment.

Agree it may be difficult to prove anything as I said further up, and a lot may depend on how it was done - if the payments truly were gifts with no promises of anything in return then likelihood is nothing can be done unless the OP can prove the other person isn't who they said they were, and even then it will be difficult.
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It is however worth reporting a potential scam if there is sufficient evidence/thought that it is indeed a scam.

[QXX666]

Find a hobby that involve adrenaline kick and make it a passion. Something like sky diving or racing car… stay away from kink fir a while

[pa****]

Sadly you're ripped off.. A lot of people are just looking for *** and not anything else. I've tried sugar daddy sites.. They ask for £500-700 for sex. Some ask for it up front. Lol. It's a sad state of affairs that people want to rip you off these days. This site is shocking. No one talks or actually wants to meet. It's all a conspiracy from the app developer to extort ***.

[Deleted Member]

OP, two personal questions... did you actually talk over the phone, or even video chatted? Did you love her?? Thank you.

Edited March 27, 2023 by Deleted Member
Wrote it wrong.

[Deleted Member]

Well here is a simple rule I would recommend to follow if the only way to make your dom/sub happy is to spend *** than you are better of without them as they only see you as *** 💰.

[Deleted Member]

Eeek! I would block her all together and just move on from it. It doesn't sound to me that it was written in the fine print on what your realionship was with her or what you guy's dicussed. No more sending woman ***. PERIOD. Unless, you guy's are both on the same page. Good luck happy saving's!

[do****]

It's a sad day in humanity when you need NDAs, written contracts, and lawyers for an exchange of pleasure. What is the world coming to 🤷🏾‍♂️🤦🏾‍♂️

[Deleted Member]

Honestly the best you can do is take it on the chin and learn from what happened.

[OldJeakel]

Never ever give *** to someone you haven't met in person and thoroughly vetted

[Go****]

If ur a dominatrix like meh and young /hot … it’s a career path .. unless ur way out of her league.. or ur partners then I think it’s just not realistic and also really rude not to pay someone for such an intimate service

[Deleted Member]

Ladies, what am I missing here?
I keep seeing things like, "you got what you paid for," but it seems pretty clear that wasn't the case at all. It would be one thing if an agreement had been made between them that stated she was only providing a service, but it sure sounds like he was led to believe he was investing in what he thought was a real relationship with a future together.
So, I ask: How could he have possibly gotten what he paid for when everything points to the opposite being true?

[An****]

I kind of agree with the ladies here, you paid her of your own free will. Was she supposed to say no? It's rough out here. Eggs ain't cheap yo.

[ge****]

1 hour ago, Anakin501 said:

I kind of agree with the ladies here, you paid her of your own free will. Was she supposed to say no? It's rough out here. Eggs ain't cheap yo.

Yes he did pay her of his own free will, and has to learn from that, *but* he was being led to believe it was on the promise of more to come, and *that* is how he was effectively being scammed - it's how scams work, regardless of whether it's kink related, or otherwise.
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Yes, he should have been wiser to it, but it's still a scam and many of them are incredibly sophisticated and easy to be taken in by.

[Nacho-2589]

16 hours ago, seonny said:

OP, two personal questions... did you actually talk over the phone, or even video chatted? Did you love her?? Thank you.

That is the crux of the issue. There are a few assumptions here. One that OP may have had some sort of live contact. Not stated so not known other than messages. There is an assumption that the woman was providing a service. Without wishing to rake over OP’s experience how do we know it was a woman? If there’s no live contact zoom, FaceTime etc there’s no way to know. I think the issue is far more nuanced than appears at first glance. Which is why stuff like this catches people out. 

[He****]

Okay and what everyone seems to be missing here is he was 19/20 at the time, because he's only 22 now and it was 2020 when he met her. What were you like at 19? The majority of us were young and dumb about sexual matters at that age. I don't know anyone at all that is an experienced kinkster at age 19, sure you can be getting there but there's still a lot of things you wouldn't know. People who have been in kink for 20 years are still learning. I'm talking majority okay. He was still a very young adult at the time, and she fleeced him. He will now learn from that and not do it again. If he doesn't then that's another story.