New Dom more experienced sub

[Hhhhh270]

Hello, 

I am relatively new to the scene; having only tried being a Dom with one previous women. So respectfully I am new. Naturally I am a quiet person but know that I have a dominate personality. After rather vanilla sex with women, my current partner has told me she enjoys being a sub. I want to explore this part of my personality; I am however nervous, as she has had this with previous men before but she is a little shy. It is a difficult situation as asking her about what she wants is met with timid responses in regard to specifics. I believe she  is anxious as to my response, and she wants me to take the initiative. She is not timid in the bedroom and very much on submissive side. 

 

My question is then, how would I approach the conversation to understand how she would like to start and what scene, would you recommend. Also any other tips will be openly received. 

[ey****]

I understand the frustration and it's a common cirlce between sub not really wanting to be forthcoming either for their own shyness or wanting the Dominant to 'guess' or surprise.

So, if you can't get the answers from her "what do you like, what do you want to try" then do some of your own research and find things YOU would be interested in doing.

But, instead of just doing them - talk her through the scenarios - there's ways to do this, even if it's just at first in bed "one day, I'm gonna tie you down and flog you" and if the response to the verbal is positive, then you know that's good to explore.  If it's negative then... change track.

[Deleted Member]

Morning Submission isn't exclusively sexual. Set her some tasks on obedience, servitude, compliance. Either at home or work. Ask her her to check in with you at specific times in the day. Highlight your expectations to her, things that will assist and aid her, there may be things she needs support and encouragement with. Place these things at the centre of your task setting, the motivation being that she will feel she's achieved and attribute the support and guidance to you because you've enabled that in her. In the bedroom, find out what she likes, reward her, deny her, and there consequences?? Use what you find in the day re compliance to tell her what you want from her, how you want her to act/ behave. She'll be very excited by this and her subby self will be putty in your hands. But remember with the gift of submission comes the responsibility of dominance.... do not misuse it.... submission is the most previous gift and will serve you well if managed correctly. You have to demonstrate you're worthy of it through your actions and reactions... praise her verbally, encourage her, support her. Sir always says he isn't telepathic. You need to speak to each other, otherwise you'll never know. Communication has got to develop between you both too build on what you have. Good luck 🔥

[SJ5461]

I really agree with what @firewitch said but also remember to ask what her hard limits are and to make it clear that if you push her too much she only has to say, you wouldn’t be mad at her. Put a safe word in place for the bedroom. Have fun and good luck x

Edited April 29, 2019 by SJ5461
Missed a word out