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Mental health and Pleasure


wi****

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Posted
What’s a good way to keep the mood going after a mental health issue? (Dysphoria, panic attack, anxiety, etc.)
Posted
You don’t? If you’re partner starts having a panic attack, you stop and make sure they’re ok. Reassure them that they don’t have to continue unless it’s what they want. Not what you want. If you press them to continue then that’s sexual ***
Posted
You. Stop.
Something like that needs time and space. F the mood...
Posted
Whether this is yourself or someone else, you need to stop and take time. Absolutely put mental health and wellbeing first. If someone is making you continue or vice versa, red flag. Especially with extreme panic attacks and anxiety. I know when my own flare I am in no position to continue nor would my partner persist or insist to keep going.
Posted
Engaging in activities which specifically cultivate a sense of good-will. There's a clever and extremely pragmatic reason why.

Spending time with your pet or a loved one, volunteering in your community, offering to help close friends. Any activity which generates an authentic sense of good-will toward other beings is what you're aiming for. Why?

This sense of good-will colors your perspective on things, people, events, and on circumstances. It colors your view of yourself and others.

And good-will is diametrically opposed to ill-will and the two states of mind are mutually incompatible. You cannot simultaneously experience good-will and ill-will at the same time, so in cultivating good-will, you reduce your capacity and tendency toward the negative states of mind you wisely stated you wanted to avoid.

So in summary, if you help nana clean her kitchen, or you're Domming with a focus on pleasing your sub, or even cuddle your favorite pet, you certainly feel a sense of good-will toward nana, or the house whore, or Roover.

Good-will is the fundamental basis of every attitude of love imaginable. Romantic love, Platonic love, family love, all of these are an attitude of good-will.

I hope there's something useful to you in that wall of text



Posted
Think of a time that made you feel invinsible then focus on that feeling repeat this whenever you can remember till the feeling becomes natural.
Posted

This is a brilliant question but there is not enough info in it so I'll try to give a few different situations....

You've not stated who was having the MH issue and there are four possibilities that immediately spring to mind:

  • Yourself.
  • Someone you're playing with.
  • Someone watching your scene.
  • Someone involved in another scene nearby.

The way I would deal will be slightly different in each scenario.It also of course depends on the nature of the issue itself as it's not just the things you've mentioned. It could be something as simple as an emotional response to a text message that has broken the mood. It's also important to recognise that dealing with an HM issue has an emotional affect on everyone, not just the person having the 'incident' and so a period of calm after the incident is needed. 

Issue with myself or someone I'm playing with - I'd stop the scene, deal with the issue at hand/get help if needed. Then I'd explain to whoever I'm playing with that I won't be continuing and that we can rearrange. 

Issue with someone not directly involved in My scene - I'd stop the scene, deal with the issue at hand and get help for the individual to make sure they were moved to a safe place. Then I'd talk to whoever I'm playing with, suggest that we take a break, have a non-alcoholic drink and then start the scene again if we want to or rearrange if we're not feeling it. 

There would be NO immediate return to the scene or "trying to keep the mood going"! As soon as an incident starts, the scene stops, the mood goes and you deal with the incident at hand. Play only resumes when everyone is back 'in the mood'. 

Posted
I’d have to agree on stopping. When something like this happens it completely crashes the mood and it can be very hard to feel that way again. Actually, someone trying stuff when you’re recovering or in a mental health moment can feel really horrible - just very much a complete disregard of your condition.

I wonder if you mean from the perspective of the person having the panic attack etc though? I think possibly the only thing is to get the reassurance and care, regain your equilibrium… and then sometimes you can just get back into it…. I think for me it’s most likely if I can break the moods completely, so by being able to laugh after…. That resets me a bit, if that makes sense? Not everyone’s moods will work this way but yes, for me a mood reset - laughing, maybe a nap… these might mean I could continue.
Posted

Workout.
Also generally treat yourself the same way you'd treat someone who was feeling scared and unsafe - comfort yourself in all ways that calm down your body. Bath. Good sleep. Soft clothes. Make yourself a nice hot drink. Give yourselves a cute carefully prepared healthy snack and meal. Show yourself that you care about yourself while doing things that scream calmness and safety.

Posted
Yeah, you want to stop ASAP. Trying to continue won't work until the issue is resolved. If you try to push, you could very easily make the affected person gain a negative impact on the scene and never wish to do it again. I myself had issues for many years as a result of trying to push through any sexual encounter I had. I didn't believe that it was ok for me to say anything during while I was on the verge of an anxiety attack the whole time. I had started developing ED issues and spiraling further into depression thinking I was defective or something. It took me a long time to snap out of it and realize the damage I was causing myself. Your mental state is absolutely crucial, especially with certain scene's. You may not see these effects right away, which is why it SHOULD ALWAYS be important for everyone.
Posted
When I used to have my mental health issues . My Dom at the time knew what I needed affection. Sensual touching then flogging and Self care. Now Ive lived a vanilla life for 7 yrs and I don't feel complete with out that longing feeling of needing flogged.
Posted
Trust, and knowing the person well helps massively, I use to have a sub who has terrible anxiety, and I’m observant if I noticed changes I’d call a break to the play, even before he said a safe word
Posted
Anxiety can be a issue and I agree with green123 knowing the person helps massively and having safe words
Posted

hmmmm...although there is a thought that good intimate relationship can somewhat fix mental health problems, but it's kinda crude since it requires your partner bearing those stressful with you, which means they need to be tough enough to handle your problems(No owes to anybody for that, they are not obliged to fix your problems). Might be too hard/demanding for them. About sex/masturabtion, it just temporarily relieve you to some extent, still not a way out. 

Maybe visiting therapist or psychiatrist is an option for ya?

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