Length of time from initial massage until you message back?

[Deleted Member]

Lots of spam too. My other question is when you can swipe through people left or right the distance is always 100+ miles away. But no way to filter it?

[Deleted Member]

19 minutes ago, buckley887 said:

I don't respond to boring messages or people way to far away from me. 

I have sent messages. It usually because I like something on their bio and I will say so. 

I have met with 6 people off this app in real life in the past 4 months I've been on it. Some encounters better than others. I make it clear in my profile I'm not interested in online or long distance relationships. So if I'm interested in meeting someone irl, I will tell them. If they beat around the bush or make excuses, I walk. I don't want pen pals. 

Thanks for the reply. I skimmed your profile and can say I appreciate the amount of information you provide. You certainly know what you want and I for one can appreciate some abrasiveness.

In all honestly if you don't message them back it's most likely due to them not reading your profile so I don't fault you really for ignoring people.

I appreciate your input.

[un****]

31 minutes ago, michellemagnolia said:

Lots of spam too. My other question is when you can swipe through people left or right the distance is always 100+ miles away. But no way to filter it?

there is no way to filter it however that being said on occasion usually every few days for me they’ll start at like a mile away from you and get progressively farther from you personally i think that makes the feature redundant but not like they’ll do anything about it

[Deleted Member]

32 minutes ago, michellemagnolia said:

Lots of spam too. My other question is when you can swipe through people left or right the distance is always 100+ miles away. But no way to filter it?

I believe the distance slider on the home screen works for the search tab or whatever it's called.

You change the distance there and it adjusts the other tabs as well I think.

[Deleted Member]

35 minutes ago, michellemagnolia said:

Lots of spam too. My other question is when you can swipe through people left or right the distance is always 100+ miles away. But no way to filter it?

Under Browse > Browse > filter button is distance. I believe that one changes things for the search screen and tabs.

I believe what I said before may be incorrect. I could be wrong on this as well. lol

[Th****]

2 hours ago, MN_Travel4Fun said:

Thank you for responding. Another woman brought up the point that she only messages people within a certain distance of her. I wonder if you are running head first into the other side of that with people you message?

Yeah unfortunately the people in my area either haven't been on in months, or 10 years older than me or not interested in poly so my messages don't even fit their criteria.

[re****]

Filter is off on search

[bu****]

4 hours ago, Tremaine_XLX said:

It doesn’t hurt anyone to be social with people ur not romantically interested in or not near you that’s the whole point of the app and social media in general 

I'm not here for networking or to make friends. My profile is very detailed in what I'm looking for.  I don't owe anyone sh**. Not my problem people don't read profiles. I even tell people how to message me to get a response. 

[Do****]

Depends when I get chance to respond

[ey****]

depends on context

I mean, *if* I'm going to reply I tend to do so shortly after reading - but, I might read more of the forum first

if it's someone who needs a longer reply than I have time for, then I reply when I have the time.   

[Deleted Member]

Depends if I want to reply, sometimes a message will persuade me to not. But usually as soon as I see it 🤷‍♀️

[TheDeathRictus]

I work on the rule that if I need shock tactics to gain interest, it won't be worthwhile interest. Likewise, any worthwhile interest will be disgusted by the more forward attempts. That's been my experience and observations of what people tend to expect/think here

[Deleted Member]

8 hours ago, buckley887 said:

I'm not here for networking or to make friends. My profile is very detailed in what I'm looking for.  I don't owe anyone sh**. Not my problem people don't read profiles. I even tell people how to message me to get a response. 

With an attitude like that you’ll be alone a miserable forever… apart of being on social apps or social media is to be social with people you don’t even live near. Plus you could easily go out and find a man at whatever city attractions you have around you but clearly that’s not something you’re interested in doing.

[th****]

For me it often depends on timing. If I'm on my way somewhere I may just have to wait to reply, if I'm free I'll just reply then. But that's pretty much the same for all apps.

It would, of course, help if this app have me notifications of a message received here.

[Deleted Member]

I have my distance set for a reasonable mount of mileage and also age preference. Many times I will respond and let them know I'm not interested because of those things are way off.If somehas messaged and I come on the app, i will respond.

[bu****]

5 hours ago, Tremaine_XLX said:

With an attitude like that you’ll be alone a miserable forever… apart of being on social apps or social media is to be social with people you don’t even live near. Plus you could easily go out and find a man at whatever city attractions you have around you but clearly that’s not something you’re interested in doing.

My guy, I was married to the love of my life for 13 years before him had no problems finding love. I know what I want. Just because we have different goals doesn't make mine less valid than yours. If you wanna network and meet friends, do you. I have a large friend group, I'm a mom of 3 kids, I don't have a ton of time to spread around. 

Like I said, I know what I want. I know what I need. Random men at the state fair will not be into my level of *** or understand my need to submit.

Don't **** in my cereal because you're having a hard time. I did nothing to you. 

[ca****]

3 hours ago, thecruelmaster82 said:

For me it often depends on timing. If I'm on my way somewhere I may just have to wait to reply, if I'm free I'll just reply then. But that's pretty much the same for all apps.

It would, of course, help if this app have me notifications of a message received here.

It does you just have to turn them on Cruel and I feel the same way 🛎️ Correct Answer!!!

[ca****]

3 hours ago, Wickedlust102 said:

I have my distance set for a reasonable mount of mileage and also age preference. Many times I will respond and let them know I'm not interested because of those things are way off.If somehas messaged and I come on the app, i will respond.

I also agree with all of that Wicked lust!!!

[CopperKnob]

6 hours ago, Tremaine_XLX said:

With an attitude like that you’ll be alone a miserable forever… apart of being on social apps or social media is to be social with people you don’t even live near. Plus you could easily go out and find a man at whatever city attractions you have around you but clearly that’s not something you’re interested in doing.

You seem to be telling people how they should use this app. We're all here for our own reasons. Just because your agenda differs to someone else's doesn't mean they're wrong.

[Deleted Member]

Well this was interesting.
This app in itself differs from other dating apps as it's tailored towards more, selective, tastes so shouldn't be compared in my opinion.
As for the when to reply part, that again differs person to person there's no set time line, patience is a virtue after all.
As for, the first message topic, read the bio and stem a conversation starter from that?, show the interest and engage, if you get a reply then keep it going, if not, then move on.

[Deleted Member]

6 hours ago, CopperKnob said:

You seem to be telling people how they should use this app. We're all here for our own reasons. Just because your agenda differs to someone else's doesn't mean they're wrong.

Nope never said that

[de****]

It depends on the vibes I'm getting. First step is to browse the profile to see interests. Sadly most of the people I get messages from are either not looking for what I want, or way too far away

[Pi****]

Messages I ignore range from ones that go straight to their kink list or the ever popular “hey” - if you come at me respectfully as a human person interested in who I am I’m more apt to answer you. The second thing I’m looking at is your distance. If you are further than 300 miles away I’m not going to waste my time. If you are under 300 miles away I will then check your profile. If I don’t think we have very strong common interests and you’re more than 100 miles away. I won’t waste my time. If you are less than 100 miles away and we have common interests I’ll answer but I will suggest to you that this is not likely to go far. If you have not answered significant portions of your profile and and you’re more than 30 miles away I won’t waste my time. If you are less than 30 miles away I am more inclined to overlook your lack of profile effort and talk to you to see if you have any redeeming qualities that suggest you might be a fair match. But if you can’t muster any conversation skills, go straight to your kink list or your di*k size than I’m out.

[MasterDarcy1979]

When I receive a PM I tend to reply straight away, unless I'm busy.

For me to be even remotely interested, my brain must be stimulated. I'm attracted to intelligence, so the initial message must be well written, respectful and they must convey information about themselves.

I don't react too kindly to Women talking to me like I own them. You have to earn my Dominance and you have to earn the right to address me by a formal name.

My ad specifically states that I don't initiate contact. The reason behind that Is that women receive dozens and dozens of messages per day.

I don't want my message to be stuck under a PM avalanche.

[Da****]

I never get messaged backed on this app, and very rarely on Tinder, fet, kinkd, or feeld. Majority of my messages go as...

"Greating of the day" (good morning, good acternoon, good evening). Then I discuss a few points of what I liked in their profile, and how it matches me. Then ask if they would like to chat and see how things go.

Now if I do get a response or that super rare initial message from someone. I try to respond as soon as I can. They took the time to message me. It is only courtesy to respond. I don't draw things out to play b.s. games. There is no time for that. Time is the one guft we can never get back!