You should definitely not push those memories away they will always come through somehow and in the end u *** yourself to do things you aren’t ready to do which causes even more trauma. Yes it is important to be a good Sub but before that you have to be comfortable. Working through trauma can be Read more… really hard you have to remember everything and realize that it’s not your fault what happend. Obvy it’s also not your hubbys fault or the little one you tried to introduce but YOU have to ask yourself what you truly want and what you are comfortable with. If your hubby is a good Dom and loves you he will work through this with you and would never push you to do things you aren’t comfortable with. I would say ask youself what you want in the end only you can help yourself only you can heal from your trauma other people can support you but they can’t do the work. I truly hope you get through this all the best ❤️