Not knowing what is fantasy and what you enjoy in reality is totally normal.
You're best bet is probably to go to a club. Most Dommes I know including myself would be unlikely to meet you for a session if you're not looking for something more long term. For me this because it's a lot of effort to Read more… go to - chatting, safety checking etc - when you might decide it's not for you 5 minutes in.
However I would play with new subs in a group setting. So if you're not willing to try it with a pro I'd say a club setting is your best option. You can try play with different people, talk to people with different tastes and it's a safer environment for a new kinkster to explore.
There are advantages to seeing a good pro. You know you're getting experienced advice, you can make the session all about exploring your fantasies without having to consider a play partners desires. You will be waiting much less time.
However a word to the wise. DO YOUR RESEARCH. Don't just give your *** to the first pretty woman in rubber who says she's a pro Domme. Anyone can say that. There are lots of women who are essentially escorts with little to no BDSM experience claiming to be Dommes. This is fine if you want a short woman in latex. If you want a quality session that is more than just being hit a bit look for a Domme that sees her work as an art.

You can use the cane you have but you'll have to be extra careful you're not hitting too hard. Ideally you want a flexible whippy cane because you're aiming to create stinging *** on the skin rather than a thuddy hard impact *** as you might on the buttocks.
You can hit the instep but be mindful Read more… of how sensitive it is on the soft inner arch. The skin is generally much thinner and softer here.

Loved it! I pro Domme and was roaring laughing. Some of its so accurate. Obviously some of its not.. it's a TV comedy. It's definitely worth a watch

Oh dear lord I'm flustered. I love a good inspection it really sets the dynamic and tone of a session. I often use them both as a pro and personally for Clothed Male Naked Female scenes and more.

It depends entirely on the club you're going to but all the clubs I've been to have been especially caring towards new members. If you're a lone female tell the organised that before you go and in my experience they'll keep an eye out for you if you're nervous.

Bastinado can be great fun but you do need to be mindful of safety.
If you think of the bottom of the foot in 4 sections. The toes, the ball, the instep and the heel.
The toes shouldn't be hit at all. They're too prone to breakage.
The ball of the foot can be hit but only lightly with a flexible Read more… cane. There is little tissue between the bones and skin so hitting hard or with inflexible implements could cause a fracture.
The instep is a very sensitive spot on most people's feet. It is a good spot to cane with a flexible bamboo cane. Even very light strokes here will pack a punch. Your main concern here is not causing swelling or damaging the tendons in this part of the foot. Moving the position of the cane slightly with each stroke will help avoid bruising or swelling that might impede mobility.
Finally the heel. The heel feels similar to the ball when hit and while the heel can be prone to damage most people's heels have more tissue than the ball. The same rules apply but you can probably afford to be a little less cautious.
The most important thing to remember with feet is less is more. This was a *** method for a reason - maximum *** for minimum effort. You don't need to use much *** to cause your sub a substantial amount of ***. Start out very light and increase slowly.
A nice way to safely develop bastinado is using different sensations. Ice, pin wheels, wax and needles can all be used on the feet to great effect. The feet are an area where you want to be focussing on sensation not ***.

Big red flags here. The fact that she was pushing to get someone else involved so soon when that wasn't how you matched is not a good sign that there's honesty there. She might not be who she says she is. Secondly to not appreciate your boundaries or privacy in several ways is a big red flag Read more… especially in a BDSM context. Giving away your details without consent is not ok. Also after you've said that's not what you want, to continue hounding you is unacceptable. If this early on this person is behaving this way I'd say they're not a good person to start exploring BDSM with. You need someone that will allow you to explore within your boundaries and make sure excitement isn't making you get into things you might regret.

It's all about her! Listen to what she says. I'd say try to anticipate her needs. There's nothing more tiring than a sub who needs to be told every little thing to do. She might be in charge but that doesn't mean she wants to manage every minute task in your life. Don't wait for her to ask. If she Read more… always wants a cup of tea when she comes in. Have it ready. If she wants you to do the cleaning, keep on top of it and go the extra mile. Don't wait to be told each chore. Be her servant not her robot... Unless that's what she wants