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Reasons for being dominant


hiddenvixen

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Posted
This is mostly for the men but open to all doms. Why are you/or like being dominant. I’m curious as to what personal reasons you have for identifying as being a dom and what kind of dominant. Especially people who say they are strictly only dominant all the time, why?
Posted
I’m a pleasure Dom and I love making a woman cum, orgasm and completely unravel. It’s so hot when I’m dominating a woman and she’s trying to push me out because I’m hitting so deep or clawing me because I’m fucking her so intensely! Just something about watching a woman arch her back and toes because she’s experiencing so much pleasure from what you’re doing to her and I think that is the hottest and most amazing thing to see. Nothing else compares to it especially when she willingly looses all control to you!
Posted
For some, it is who we truly are. It's like love, no reason, it just happens to be so. We don't choose the person we fall in love with from the person we are.
Declan-Delain
Posted
I like the sort of women that would prefer I be dominant than submissive.
Corporates and go getters seem to enjoy handing over control, I happen to enjoy their company.

Win win
Posted
the answer to your question is.

i believe a masterful master is a loving gentleman who express his love and care in a passionate possessive way
the way i understand the dynamic is.
unconditional support and love and leadership against complete submission.
a true master understand submission must be earned
the goal is to build a passionate connections in every way. emotionally intellectually and physically.
power and autority must be given willingly by the sub as an act of trust
love in possessive way angainst complete trust .
this is the opposit of vanilla type of relationship
it is a journey. an exciting journey where both partenar grow and celebrate their darkest tendencies.
a true master support his sub to explore her inner desires and dark tendencies .
let us say. a gentleman in public and a naughty kinky loving master in private who try gently to strech the boundaries
personally i hold a degree in french litterture
very interested in psychology .
i love DIY
to be completely honest i find you fabulous. i believe you are emotionally intelligent .
kind regards Blossom
Posted
5 minutes ago, Johnoxford said:
the answer to your question is.

i believe a masterful master is a loving gentleman who express his love and care in a passionate possessive way
the way i understand the dynamic is.
unconditional support and love and leadership against complete submission.
a true master understand submission must be earned
the goal is to build a passionate connections in every way. emotionally intellectually and physically.
power and autority must be given willingly by the sub as an act of trust
love in possessive way angainst complete trust .
this is the opposit of vanilla type of relationship
it is a journey. an exciting journey where both partenar grow and celebrate their darkest tendencies.
a true master support his sub to explore her inner desires and dark tendencies .
let us say. a gentleman in public and a naughty kinky loving master in private who try gently to strech the boundaries
personally i hold a degree in french litterture
very interested in psychology .
i love DIY
to be completely honest i find you fabulous. i believe you are emotionally intelligent .
kind regards Blossom

Good answer

Posted (edited)

I used to think I liked more dominant, aggressive women that made the first move and took control of me and the sexual experience. 

Then as I became a little older and after my divorce, I realized (with a little soul searching and fun sex) I can be me by being dominant. 

It felt natural. 

I look back and now see it's not that I liked aggressive and dominant women, it's that I didn't have the confidence nor did I know myself. 

It's interesting that it took some experimenting with sex and realizing I'm dominant, that lead to me realizing that I do myself. 

I'm at a place with my dominance where Brats are no longer needed. As a matter of fact, they now turn me off. They used to help get me to a place of confidence and feeling like I'm in control but now I'd prefer a woman completely submissive. The dynamic just feels natural. 

I'm not sure if others can relate or if any of this makes sense but here I am. 

Edited by Deleted Member
I needed to add a few words to help this make sense
Posted
For me it's far too many things to put in a single comment but I will try to summarize. From early on I had a partner that loved experimenting and was more experienced then me. I loved tying her up and making her orgasm. It was such a wonderful feeling especially knowing that no other partners had made her cum before. We experimented with her tying me up but I hated it. Being very ticklish didn't help! I think with the partners I have had, it just worked. The idea that I'm in control takes pressure off the submissive partner, who can be shy or embarrassed to say what they want it enjoy. As a Dom you can let them to try new things and there is potentially no limit to where you can go with a willing partner.
Posted
Hiding my ***, I had heart wrenching experiences and being dominant/sadistic (only online/text) covers the ***. So it’s kinda the***utic.
Posted
Dominance isn’t all barking orders, imposing your will onto someone and being good at rough sex. There is way more that goes into it than that. True dominance comes from when your person knows and trusts that you have their best interests at heart even in the roughest of scenes. When you are able to take care of most of their wants and needs in and out of the bedroom. When your submissive wants to do whatever you want because they crave your creativity, imagination and ability to read them and give them exactly what fulfills them. Always giving them an atmosphere and environment to thrive in, let loose and be their truest self. You won’t have to take it… they will give you everything they have and then dig deeper and find some more.

I didn’t just wake up one day and decide “I want to be a dom!” My life experiences have forged me into this person long before I realized there was a lifestyle for it. It’s an unspoken Ora and presence that is felt by those around you. I’ve always been a low key alpha male. It’s in the eyes. Those windows to the soul revealing who we truly are.
Posted
3 minutes ago, SINrzDream said:
Dominance isn’t all barking orders, imposing your will onto someone and being good at rough sex. There is way more that goes into it than that. True dominance comes from when your person knows and trusts that you have their best interests at heart even in the roughest of scenes. When you are able to take care of most of their wants and needs in and out of the bedroom. When your submissive wants to do whatever you want because they crave your creativity, imagination and ability to read them and give them exactly what fulfills them. Always giving them an atmosphere and environment to thrive in, let loose and be their truest self. You won’t have to take it… they will give you everything they have and then dig deeper and find some more.

I didn’t just wake up one day and decide “I want to be a dom!” My life experiences have forged me into this person long before I realized there was a lifestyle for it. It’s an unspoken Ora and presence that is felt by those around you. I’ve always been a low key alpha male. It’s in the eyes. Those windows to the soul revealing who we truly are.

This is it!

Posted
19 minutes ago, Baaz22 said:
Hiding my ***, I had heart wrenching experiences and being dominant/sadistic (only online/text) covers the ***. So it’s kinda the***utic.

I'm sorry you've had bad experiences in your past but kink isn't therapy and shouldn't ever be used as such. This is dangerous behaviour, and should be seen as a massive red flag. The amount of respect needed to partake is paramount, hopefully you never extend these actions beyond text.

Posted
22 minutes ago, DJH_13 said:

I'm sorry you've had bad experiences in your past but kink isn't therapy and shouldn't ever be used as such. This is dangerous behaviour, and should be seen as a massive red flag. The amount of respect needed to partake is paramount, hopefully you never extend these actions beyond text.

Thank you, I ask for consent and if the person is into it, I know myself I wouldn’t do that outside text and I get rejected many times and I just say "have a nice week" so yeah i let it out but only with the consent, I respect the other person, I also have a soft side.

Posted
I’m a switch… I never used to be switch, I was always 100% submissive, but I got drawn into FinDom and the stress of nearly going bankrupt at the hands of someone who made out she cared about me but turned out to only want *** seemed to bring something out in me and I became 100% Dominant for 4 years. Then over a period of about a year my submissive side crept back and I seem to yo-yo between the two quite rapidly now.
Posted
For me in my specific case, it's for the feelings of being wanted, strong, and in control, which I think is lacking in a lot of mens lives in some aspects, including my own. It makes me feel special when done right, like I provide. Like I have some things that a person needs that only I can give them, and the added joy of giving it. You feel power over you life in a way that wants to make you be even more of all the good things that make up being a good person. That is my take anyway. Hope it helps.
Posted
I don't completely understand the psychology of it and I'm not sure I want to. There's something incredibly arousing about depraved hedonism and being the controller of another's *** and pleasure, including the pleasure she gets from the *** and all the physiological aspects that come along with that. Giving herself to you, being in control of another human in a way we otherwise wouldn't and shouldn't, while knowing she's gone into it with both eyes open, knowing what's in store or, at the very least, what kind of things are in store: when I can get that, while knowing I'm helping my partner on her own journey, it's indescribable.
Posted
Great question. I do really enjoy reading about how and why men are dominant.
Mezmerism
Posted
It’s difficult to explain. It’s like the feeling of empowerment, overpowering is a release( my perspective as a female dominant).
Posted
I love the feeling of being superior, being in the pure power situation where I am worshipped to the fullest. It gives me a great joy when I see that my slave is really enjoying watching me deep in pleasure.
Posted
5 hours ago, SINrzDream said:
Dominance isn’t all barking orders, imposing your will onto someone and being good at rough sex. There is way more that goes into it than that. True dominance comes from when your person knows and trusts that you have their best interests at heart even in the roughest of scenes. When you are able to take care of most of their wants and needs in and out of the bedroom. When your submissive wants to do whatever you want because they crave your creativity, imagination and ability to read them and give them exactly what fulfills them. Always giving them an atmosphere and environment to thrive in, let loose and be their truest self. You won’t have to take it… they will give you everything they have and then dig deeper and find some more.

I didn’t just wake up one day and decide “I want to be a dom!” My life experiences have forged me into this person long before I realized there was a lifestyle for it. It’s an unspoken Ora and presence that is felt by those around you. I’ve always been a low key alpha male. It’s in the eyes. Those windows to the soul revealing who we truly are.

Well said!!

Posted
Time is our most precious resource, and when someone trusts someone else to completely surrender to them. And then having that reward of release for both partners, that is truly something special and rare.
Posted
I like feeling trusted and I like being in control! I like being satisfied and if my partner dose a good job of it they get rewarded. I like seeing what then do and deciding if they done a good enough job to be pleased/ satisfied after. I also have a very dominant body as I’m 6’2 290 pounds and big built.
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