In the changing cubicle of a busy swimming pool. Also in the middle of an urban park.

Absolutely it is the Dom's role to respect and protect the sub. While disrespect/degrading might be ok within a role play scene even then limits should be respected and the sub should be looked after.

For me it comes naturally depending on the gender of my partner. I am just instinctively more dominant with a female partner and equally submissive with a male partner.
Just to be clear this has nothing to do with how I view men or women generally, if anything the reverse since (as a general rule) Read more… I hold respect women and hold them in higher esteem.
I think it has more to do with creativity. With a woman I can instantly think of 100 ways to tease, *** or pleasure... But when presented with a man it's a case of "and what am I supposed to do with this?" As a result I need direction.

Plenty on the litrotica website

I can't help with suggestions I'm afraid. But it is worth reminding yourself that most people are more critical of themselves and that beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

I would ask if they needed a hand