Fghjk Posted September 29 Posted September 29 I dont think so, ive had some dates recently and it is helping me find out specifically what I'd like. A lot of people date out of boredom though and no objective. So i see what you mean
ma**** Posted September 29 Posted September 29 So, as someone in an open and ethical relationship, I would love to date to find out if we are compatible for someone safe, kind, inspiring, and regularly going to care about me. I think the dates stop and shopping start because there are a lot of folks who are not brave enough to be *** and stand up for who they are and what they want. I have fallen for that too. I specifically prefer married, divorced, and open male presenting people over 40, usually in IT, because I am not changing my preference or desire for a D/s secondary relationship where I am submissive and cared for. I want someone dorky, and nerdy, and dominant. I want someone who has it together a bit. I want chemistry. I want what I do to last for many years or as long as we want.
al**** Posted September 29 Posted September 29 I feel you 😞 I’m in the exact situation you described.. it feels hopeless
Jo**** Posted September 29 Posted September 29 i’m not saying you’re wrong… I just don’t know if fetlife is the place to find the love of my life, etc
Pi**** Posted September 29 Posted September 29 Being over 50 it's difficult. I want to date, talk to people, do things. Everyone else just wants to f**k. That's not a high priority for me. If someone is right, then yes, but not right away.
ea**** Posted September 29 Posted September 29 I think porn is what messed up most people. Showing these awesome people ether in some smutty book or vid that just doesn't exist normally. I'm definitely one of the ones who searching constantly with no luck.
kb**** Posted September 29 Posted September 29 Yeah...I have been on one date in over 2.5 years, and that was only intended as a friendship. Online dating can be summed up as women dying of thirst at sea and men dying of thirst in the desert.
Deleted Member Posted September 29 Posted September 29 4 hours ago, HotMommy666 said: I don’t think it’s dead, but now the women started to know their value and the chivalry is indeed half dead and for me its a very important point. Personally me from my past relationships/ marriage know the high standards and I will never jump for less. The men my age are immature, never ready for any commitment, want whatever but not a monogamous healthy relationship. No thanks. I want to fall in love and not persuade myself to be with someone I don’t really like. I’d rather be alone, than with whomever. And for sex there are plenty 20 years old guys. This has been my experience as well.
Ch**** Posted September 29 Posted September 29 It’s for sure rough especially as an older professional. Hard to meet and make friends locally, Apps are full of bots and unbalanced ratio. I believe people have a hard time focusing on one person.
Go**** Posted September 29 Posted September 29 Short answer; Basically yes. Hook up culture has decimated dating. But what has really destroyed it is the mounting distrust between the sexes. 20 years ago you could actually walk up to a woman and ask her out, now that’s seen as creepy and inappropriate unless you’re at least and 8 on the 1 - 10 scale. Nobody wants to interact IRL anymore. Everyone wants this digital shield/filter to keep everyone from judging them I guess. Lots of people are fake AF. They put on this persona for Social Media but that’s not who they are IRL at all. Meeting someone organically is all but impossible now. Everyone has their guard up and it’s nearly impossible to break through unless you’re just one charming motherf *cker. I’ve just about given up and accepted that I’ll probably just be single for the rest of my life.
Ko**** Posted September 29 Posted September 29 It's one thing to find someone for the "right now" and nothing wrong with that. I know what I need in anything long term. And there are areas I can compromise on and areas I can't. If I can't get what I need, I will part company. Apps help me find the ones with similar interests because some of the kinks I have end up being something that they are not interested in. And putting that out there is scary when you might be with someone who may be in closer proximity to your social groups.
bu**** Posted September 29 Posted September 29 I feel you because recently everyone is just wanting and bang and dump situation where as some of us fall fast and they don’t like that commitment. 🥺 I wish there were more opened about starting something so fantastic that even the kinky side of things are amazing but again there’s fakes with doms and things and it’s just scary.
Deleted Member Posted September 29 Posted September 29 It certainly seems that way, but you also have to be cautious of falling into an echo chamber
ha**** Posted September 29 Posted September 29 Dating is dead because these type of aps it to easy for women to move onto the next one u dont have to put effort into staying so then men stop trying with with that women wait til u break our heart and turn to sites like this to just use women to get laid so ye dating is dead I've found the women I'll love til the day I die which is hopefully soon because I wont find another love like the live i gave her thanks jordyn mcellroy
ey**** Posted September 29 Posted September 29 in a way, mind, ahem this is one of the worst places for a balanced ask of the question -- because for most folk, if they were finding dates no problem*, they wouldn't be here. (*which I don't mean as any slight against any individuals)
Deleted Member Posted September 29 Posted September 29 I don't know if dating is dead but it sure does feel like it is at this point.
He**** Posted September 29 Posted September 29 People are to into their phones I left my phone in car on a date the girl got mad at me cause she was on her phone while I was asking her questions is dating dead YES in this new age way but there are us younger guys that are old school
Lsmart938 Posted September 29 Posted September 29 @MayBull … if only you were closer I would definitely date you !! 😍
Sw**** Posted September 29 Posted September 29 8 hours ago, GoldenOral420 said: Short answer; Basically yes. Hook up culture has decimated dating. But what has really destroyed it is the mounting distrust between the sexes. 20 years ago you could actually walk up to a woman and ask her out, now that’s seen as creepy and inappropriate unless you’re at least and 8 on the 1 - 10 scale. Nobody wants to interact IRL anymore. Everyone wants this digital shield/filter to keep everyone from judging them I guess. Lots of people are fake AF. They put on this persona for Social Media but that’s not who they are IRL at all. Meeting someone organically is all but impossible now. Everyone has their guard up and it’s nearly impossible to break through unless you’re just one charming motherf *cker. I’ve just about given up and accepted that I’ll probably just be single for the rest of my life. Same. Sux especially trying to date IRL when the person u r interested in is also looking around the room for something cuter or more interesting... ugh
Ki**** Posted September 30 Posted September 30 Actually for us older caterers it is over, I feel the courting is a young person's game. For us it's let's be honest with what we want from each other without being shy. Us older people want to say what we like and what we want. Why bs the other side on the " date".
Co**** Posted September 30 Posted September 30 I’m not sure how to define “dating as we once knew it.” What did you once know? Dating in your 40s has ALWAYS been different - and harder - than dating in your 20s. Adding to this is the explosion of online scammers and the development of unrealistic expectations. It may be extra difficult now, but things are always going to change as time goes by.
Ka**** Posted September 30 Posted September 30 I feel like dating is dead. I'm on a few different apps, and I tell anyone I talk to that I'm looking for a monogamous, long-term boyfriend. IF we get to the point that we meet, they get sex, which is on me for putting out, and then they are never heard from again! It's so frustrating!!
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