Advice Regarding Switching

[Deleted Member]

So I've always thought of myself as a complete sub but recently I've had a few dominant moments. My partner is a switch but so far his been 100% dominant. A few times I've attempted to be dominant but unsure if this is just my Bratty side wanting to get more punishments/acting out or if I'm in fact a switch. I'd like to explore this further to see if I am a switch or not but I'm not sure where to start and how to do things safely. Any pointers or advice would be great? 

 

Thanks in advance guys 😘

[ey****]

Soooo

firstly, it doesn't matter if you're switch or not - or if there is sometimes of perceived Dominant activities you enjoy.

But, certainly - if there's stuff you enjoy and want to do more of - DO IT!

In terms of doing things safely, it depends really which activities we're talking about?

[Deleted Member]

  5 hours ago, eyemblacksheep said:

Soooo

firstly, it doesn't matter if you're switch or not - or if there is sometimes of perceived Dominant activities you enjoy.

But, certainly - if there's stuff you enjoy and want to do more of - DO IT!

In terms of doing things safely, it depends really which activities we're talking about?

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Thank you for your response @eyemblacksheep

I have playfully put my hand about my partners throat during play but not ***d him, just abit worried about doing it wrong and hurting him? 

Just in general I'm a little worried about maybe being a little heavy handed when it coming to pinning him, tieing him, choking ect and I'm just worried of hurting him as that's something I never want to do. 

[ey****]

At least at first perhaps talk through with him what you'd like to do and get him to feedback if anything is too much.   Obviously anything *** related you have to be careful on - but you can stop the air without being too savage (I usually count in my head when I've restricted someone's air - how far I count depends on how well I know them, but 10 is a good starting point before letting go) get him to tap your arm if it's too much.

From there you can kinda gauge what he can and can't take.

The other week I did a scene where someone was pinning me down and smothering me and it was supposed to be an assassination attempt - because she was so tiny I was worried about fighting back and sending her flying - so there's that to consider also  

[MrMysterMannn]

  8 hours ago, Brattyb94 said:

Thank you for your response @eyemblacksheep

I have playfully put my hand about my partners throat during play but not ***d him, just abit worried about doing it wrong and hurting him? 

Just in general I'm a little worried about maybe being a little heavy handed when it coming to pinning him, tieing him, choking ect and I'm just worried of hurting him as that's something I never want to do. 

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You can also press on the sides of the throat, where and not around the windpipe because that's the most dangerous part, the windpipe.  You can damage that pretty easily.  Gradual chocking, like enclosing your hand around slowly and gradually tighter, until maybe he taps you on the arm to signal he's at the limit he's comfortable with.  But then maybe start off from 5, since you can damage the brain from lack of oxygen rather quickly.  Or if he does it to you, get an idea of how it feels for you and then control your way around that sense of how it feels to you.

A lot of things I do to my sub or as a Top, I see how it feels on me first, so then I can have a better understanding of how it's going to possibly feel on them.  But above all, communication before, during and after you try things and play is the most important tool Dom's have.  As well as observations and just understanding their reactions.

 

[Deleted Member]

  11 hours ago, eyemblacksheep said:

At least at first perhaps talk through with him what you'd like to do and get him to feedback if anything is too much.   Obviously anything *** related you have to be careful on - but you can stop the air without being too savage (I usually count in my head when I've restricted someone's air - how far I count depends on how well I know them, but 10 is a good starting point before letting go) get him to tap your arm if it's too much.

From there you can kinda gauge what he can and can't take.

The other week I did a scene where someone was pinning me down and smothering me and it was supposed to be an assassination attempt - because she was so tiny I was worried about fighting back and sending her flying - so there's that to consider also  

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Yeah communication is key! I will have a chat with him! 

Yeah movements and safe words are important! 

 

Yeah that's fair... Sounds like you had fun! 

[Deleted Member]

  5 hours ago, MrMysterMannn said:

You can also press on the sides of the throat, where and not around the windpipe because that's the most dangerous part, the windpipe.  You can damage that pretty easily.  Gradual chocking, like enclosing your hand around slowly and gradually tighter, until maybe he taps you on the arm to signal he's at the limit he's comfortable with.  But then maybe start off from 5, since you can damage the brain from lack of oxygen rather quickly.  Or if he does it to you, get an idea of how it feels for you and then control your way around that sense of how it feels to you.

A lot of things I do to my sub or as a Top, I see how it feels on me first, so then I can have a better understanding of how it's going to possibly feel on them.  But above all, communication before, during and after you try things and play is the most important tool Dom's have.  As well as observations and just understanding their reactions.

 

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Yeah I've seen that before about the side of the neck. Thank you for the advice! Sounds like a good way to go about it! 

 

Yus ofcourse communication is key. We are lucky as we have known each other 6 years and know each other inside out. We have recently got in a relationship but we can read each other like a book! 

[Deleted Member]

Had my first play as a dom.. Was fun and empowering 😈

[ey****]

  14 minutes ago, Brattyb94 said:

Had my first play as a dom.. Was fun and empowering 😈

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yasssssss

[Deleted Member]

  25 minutes ago, eyemblacksheep said:

yasssssss

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Indeed yassssss! Can't wait to explore this side of me more! 

[Deleted Member]

Well second time you lost your virginity 😈😂

[Deleted Member]

  Just now, FabSeverus said:

Well second time you lost your virginity 😈😂

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Haha indeed... Definitely better than the first time I lost my virginity 😂