Why not anal?

March 1

Don't knock it until you've tried it and as they say you'll never know until you do but I do think it's a good thing to never expect anyone to do anything they wouldn't try themselves

March 1

27 minutes ago, Lsmart938 said:

Good question !

No I have not.
I previously mentioned the other pegging post and I did add a couple of replies on that.

In short I do enjoy anal self pleasure now and then ( I have to be in the mood). But it does disable my ability to get an erection, so it’s a give and take thing for me.
I would consider letting the right lady to give me a pegging!

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Thank you for answering!

March 1

24 minutes ago, Fetishmanc said:

Don't knock it until you've tried it and as they say you'll never know until you do but I do think it's a good thing to never expect anyone to do anything they wouldn't try themselves

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I think that’s sound advice @Fetishmanc
As in my reply to @NexumSange I have self experience of anal play and would consider being pegged - by the right woman.

I wonder if all dominant men are open minded in the same way ?
Let’s open up the debate !

March 1

1 hour ago, freyainthenorth said:

For me, it’s medical reasons.
IBS, haemorrhoids, (even had surgery for it) and the uncleanliness. As a person with autoimmune disorders, that along with watersports, rimming or any other bathroom related kinks, can lead to an early grave and I am a Kinkster who want to continue my kinky life for as long as I can. I have tried it nonetheless, when younger. Didn’t enjoy it at all.
It didn’t end well!

Butt plugs though, those are perfectly safe taking the right precautions.
(unless the haemorrhoids are acting up)

Thing is, those are my only hard limits. But people think that just because those are hard limits, they automatically think I’m “not kinky enough” for this lifestyle. Which is how I know they’re not experienced enough to handle me. It’s rather boring to talk to people who thinks in this way for me, they always try to bypass it, negotiate, demand or sometimes even take without consent. As if their pleasure is worth more then my life. They are simply not respecting my health at all and think I’m joking. Laughing at me for even having any hard limits.

I do like watching porn with anal scenes in them though, so living vicariously through them I guess. I wish I did enjoy it, and was in a better place health wise to perform rimming and watersports as an act of service.

Just giving you some real reasons why some people have it as an actual hard limits. Ie Life

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@freyainthenorth - thanks for sharing personal details and experiences.

This is certainly an eye opener and deserves the respect that is due. I’m sorry to hear of your issues and the insensitivity that you have received. It’s a shame that the people you want to take you seriously actually do not - maybe understanding why that is could help you in future ?

I’ve gained more through this post than I expected and the personal replies are very much appreciated.

I hope you benefit somehow from your open and honest response.

Take care, have fun but play safe.

Luke x

March 2

13 hours ago, freyainthenorth said:

For me, it’s medical reasons.
IBS, haemorrhoids, (even had surgery for it) and the uncleanliness. As a person with autoimmune disorders, that along with watersports, rimming or any other bathroom related kinks, can lead to an early grave and I am a Kinkster who want to continue my kinky life for as long as I can. I have tried it nonetheless, when younger. Didn’t enjoy it at all.
It didn’t end well!

Butt plugs though, those are perfectly safe taking the right precautions.
(unless the haemorrhoids are acting up)

Thing is, those are my only hard limits. But people think that just because those are hard limits, they automatically think I’m “not kinky enough” for this lifestyle. Which is how I know they’re not experienced enough to handle me. It’s rather boring to talk to people who thinks in this way for me, they always try to bypass it, negotiate, demand or sometimes even take without consent. As if their pleasure is worth more then my life. They are simply not respecting my health at all and think I’m joking. Laughing at me for even having any hard limits.

I do like watching porn with anal scenes in them though, so living vicariously through them I guess. I wish I did enjoy it, and was in a better place health wise to perform rimming and watersports as an act of service.

Just giving you some real reasons why some people have it as an actual hard limits. Ie Life

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I too find that others are quick to put ANYone down (or try and coerce etc) who aren’t into much/anything anal. The only fact I need to know is YES or NO in a given moment and that’s amazingly enough for me to RESPECT OTHERS’ boundary/choice/decision/desire at the time and move away from it.
Cannot believe all the people (but yes, mostly penis-holders) who miss + disregard the whole RESPECT aspect in any matter and especially regarding this in particular… Trust and comfortability aren’t the same across the board for me and also, why would YOU want to engage in an activity that your partner isn’t into or wanting? That brings up a whole other troubling aspect.

March 2

I love anal.
However… u have to work up to it because it hurts and makes me feel gross like u dont know if dude is gettinh grossness on him. Like i dony think so but do i know?

March 2

For me, I initially said no to this simply because I didn’t have enough knowledge...
I wasn’t aware that you could gradually train with plugs to build up or that you could douche and clean internally for a more comfortable and hygienic experience....
Once I learned about these things and took the time to train, I felt more confident and that no changed to a hard yes

March 2

8 hours ago, NexumSange said:

I too find that others are quick to put ANYone down (or try and coerce etc) who aren’t into much/anything anal. The only fact I need to know is YES or NO in a given moment and that’s amazingly enough for me to RESPECT OTHERS’ boundary/choice/decision/desire at the time and move away from it.
Cannot believe all the people (but yes, mostly penis-holders) who miss + disregard the whole RESPECT aspect in any matter and especially regarding this in particular… Trust and comfortability aren’t the same across the board for me and also, why would YOU want to engage in an activity that your partner isn’t into or wanting? That brings up a whole other troubling aspect.

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Respect is a recurring theme in a lot of posts - many people recognise it and many disregard it.

I totally agree with your point though sometimes as people grow, as relationships grow then ideas change and there should be the option to reopen discussions and see.

However - This is a natural and respectful progression - not “badgering” the other person to do something they don’t want to do.

March 2

3 hours ago, Nonnahs said:

I love anal.
However… u have to work up to it because it hurts and makes me feel gross like u dont know if dude is gettinh grossness on him. Like i dony think so but do i know?

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Thanks @Nonnahs - work it up and plenty of lube ! I guess if a guy is willing to partake then he is aware of what may happen.

I guess advice on douching and wearing a condom are relevant here. Sometimes maybe if it’s unplanned then douching won’t be done in advance so more risk of a little mess - but again that risk should not be a surprise so I wouldn’t worry about him - just you clear your mind and enjoy yourself !

March 2

1 hour ago, Submissive_summer said:

For me, I initially said no to this simply because I didn’t have enough knowledge...
I wasn’t aware that you could gradually train with plugs to build up or that you could douche and clean internally for a more comfortable and hygienic experience....
Once I learned about these things and took the time to train, I felt more confident and that no changed to a hard yes

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Great reply - I’m pleased that you found a way ! When I wrote my initial post I was wondering how many said no just because they didn’t have enough “knowledge” and just had a preconceived mindset that it was dirty and ***ful.

If done right, time taken to work it up and plenty of lube it sounds like a lot of people can enjoy something they may have otherwise missed out on.

March 2

My sub was against it (though not a hard limit) because of hygiene and personal embarrassment reasons.
.
We took it really slowly, worked through initial ***, and got her to push into my cock, rather than me push into her
.
She still much prefers vagina and can get into her own head easily, but it’s an option open to me now that we worked up to it slowly at the beginning.
.
When I tell her I’m going to fvck her ass, drag her to the bed by her hair before slamming her face down and roughly using her. I now know her well enough to know she is able to take it.
.
And she knows me well enough to know that I am listening for negative feedback, even while “forcing” her to do whatever I want.
.
It takes time and respect to get to this place. No one should feel they have to.

March 2

4 hours ago, Chesterfield_Dreams said:

My sub was against it (though not a hard limit) because of hygiene and personal embarrassment reasons.
.
We took it really slowly, worked through initial ***, and got her to push into my cock, rather than me push into her
.
She still much prefers vagina and can get into her own head easily, but it’s an option open to me now that we worked up to it slowly at the beginning.
.
When I tell her I’m going to fvck her ass, drag her to the bed by her hair before slamming her face down and roughly using her. I now know her well enough to know she is able to take it.
.
And she knows me well enough to know that I am listening for negative feedback, even while “forcing” her to do whatever I want.
.
It takes time and respect to get to this place. No one should feel they have to.

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2 key points I guess:

1. Consent

2. You’ve taken time to work it up respectfully.

Thanks for your contribution!

Luke

March 2

23 hours ago, Lsmart938 said:

Good question !

No I have not.
I previously mentioned the other pegging post and I did add a couple of replies on that.

In short I do enjoy anal self pleasure now and then ( I have to be in the mood). But it does disable my ability to get an erection, so it’s a give and take thing for me.
I would consider letting the right lady to give me a pegging!

Expand

I have that same issue! I can’t get an erection when I’m involved in anal play! I can still cum but I’m not hard! I am not sure why that happens! I guess like you said it’s a give and take! My wife understands when she does that I will cum but will not be hard! It still feels good! I don’t know if she pegged me if that would give me an erection but fingering and prostate play seems to take it away! Thank you!

March 2

25 minutes ago, Starving said:

I have that same issue! I can’t get an erection when I’m involved in anal play! I can still cum but I’m not hard! I am not sure why that happens! I guess like you said it’s a give and take! My wife understands when she does that I will cum but will not be hard! It still feels good! I don’t know if she pegged me if that would give me an erection but fingering and prostate play seems to take it away! Thank you!

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I did mention in one of my replies that there is a different discussion concerning pegging. I did post a reply concerning my disarmed erection during anal play to myself and it’s not uncommon and can be expected.
I’m not sure of the actual reason why it happens to some guys and not others though it seems more physiological than psychological.

I did wonder if an erection would come either more practise ? What’s your thoughts ?

Luke

March 2

7 minutes ago, Lsmart938 said:

I did mention in one of my replies that there is a different discussion concerning pegging. I did post a reply concerning my disarmed erection during anal play to myself and it’s not uncommon and can be expected.
I’m not sure of the actual reason why it happens to some guys and not others though it seems more physiological than psychological.

I did wonder if an erection would come either more practise ? What’s your thoughts ?

Luke

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I think you might be right about the psychological or physiological side effects! I concentrate so much on that area and what my wife is doing back there and inside that I may not be concentrating on my penis if that makes any sense! I definitely feel charged up and feel sensations in my penis area but I can’t get an erection! I constantly feel the urge to *** and that may keep me from getting an erection! I may be concentrating too much on ***ing! I’m gonna keep trying each time to get one and hopefully it will come! I hope this helps or makes sense!

March 2

8 minutes ago, Starving said:

I think you might be right about the psychological or physiological side effects! I concentrate so much on that area and what my wife is doing back there and inside that I may not be concentrating on my penis if that makes any sense! I definitely feel charged up and feel sensations in my penis area but I can’t get an erection! I constantly feel the urge to *** and that may keep me from getting an erection! I may be concentrating too much on ***ing! I’m gonna keep trying each time to get one and hopefully it will come! I hope this helps or makes sense!

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I’ve also seen videos of guys getting pegged and I noticed most of them had no erection! I did notice that the ones who were getting a blowjob while being pegged seemed to have erections! Thank you!

March 2

31 minutes ago, Starving said:

I think you might be right about the psychological or physiological side effects! I concentrate so much on that area and what my wife is doing back there and inside that I may not be concentrating on my penis if that makes any sense! I definitely feel charged up and feel sensations in my penis area but I can’t get an erection! I constantly feel the urge to *** and that may keep me from getting an erection! I may be concentrating too much on ***ing! I’m gonna keep trying each time to get one and hopefully it will come! I hope this helps or makes sense!

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Your wife sounds fab btw !
Sounds like you can regularly access a good pegging (lucky fella !).

I would suggest the opposite - rather than “try” to get an erection - just totally relax, submerge your headspace and let it flow. In my experience, overthinking sexual acts tends to have the opposite effect so breathe deep and don’t think about it at all !

March 2

4 minutes ago, Lsmart938 said:

Your wife sounds fab btw !
Sounds like you can regularly access a good pegging (lucky fella !).

I would suggest the opposite - rather than “try” to get an erection - just totally relax, submerge your headspace and let it flow. In my experience, overthinking sexual acts tends to have the opposite effect so breathe deep and don’t think about it at all !

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Thank you so much. I will try that!

March 2

33 minutes ago, Starving said:

I’ve also seen videos of guys getting pegged and I noticed most of them had no erection! I did notice that the ones who were getting a blowjob while being pegged seemed to have erections! Thank you!

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I’m definitely willing to try that ! 🥵

March 2

Just now, Lsmart938 said:

I’m definitely willing to try that ! 🥵

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Me too! I would love to be in that scenario 🥵

March 2

1 minute ago, Starving said:

Me too! I would love to be in that scenario 🥵

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A threesome or an orgy is on my bucket list!😀

March 2

40 minutes ago, Starving said:

I’ve also seen videos of guys getting pegged and I noticed most of them had no erection! I did notice that the ones who were getting a blowjob while being pegged seemed to have erections! Thank you!

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I need 2 ladies to help me here … one pegger and one giver …

… all in the name of science of course ! 😉 😜

March 2

7 minutes ago, Lsmart938 said:

I need 2 ladies to help me here … one pegger and one giver …

… all in the name of science of course ! 😉 😜

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Me also! But only in the name of science like you said 😀

March 3

In response where do i find a guy who actually prepares or gives a shit? Like ive never had anyone give more than two second energy al

March 3

3 hours ago, Nonnahs said:

In response where do i find a guy who actually prepares or gives a shit? Like ive never had anyone give more than two second energy al

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I agree preparation is key, other wise there is no point!