Never had sex 🙈

[CopperKnob]

  6 minutes ago, basingstoke671024 said:

AnnieBlonde, I have actually asked the women after the dates and they just tell me that there was no romantic connection or chemistry. Then again I have to ask myself the question- why would a woman want me when she has all the men in the world to choose from?

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That's not the right question, though, is it. There's no need to be all woe is me, no one dies from not uaving sex. No one has the choice of "all the men in the world"
The right question is, "Why would someone choose me?""
Or
"What am I bringing to the table that doesn't create an additional burden for her?"
Or
"What is it about me that I believe I'm causing women to feel nervous and uncomfortable around me?"
Or
"What do I need to change so that women I have an interest in and hope to develop an intimate relationship to feel comfortable and safe in my presence?"

[ba****]

arnhem961, ive never heard of ecstatic dance or Tantric dating, I'm an awful dancer btw

[Ri****]

By don’t worry!! I was the same age when I was a virgin .. I was working a lot , no time for that..

[Au****]

  16 minutes ago, basingstoke671024 said:

I can't understand why people are so surprised when I told them at I've never been physical with a woman, I mean why would a woman want me anyway?

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Man I understand that your entire life of sexlessness and rejection must make you feel frustrated and widely insicure but this attitude surely won’t help you..
You may start valuing yourself a bit more. Therapy might be a good option too as a start..

[CopperKnob]

  16 minutes ago, basingstoke671024 said:

I can't understand why people are so surprised when I told them at I've never been physical with a woman, I mean why would a woman want me anyway?

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I'm calling it.
You've either landed here from the manosphere by mistake or looking for the Pick Me's.
I've no interest in conversing with either mindset.

[ge****]

  7 hours ago, basingstoke671024 said:

gemini_man, I've had a lot of connections and interactions with women in my life but they have never showed an interest in me. Ive been online dating for years. If you read my other comments on here then it will explain more. I'm more using this app as an experiment to see if any women are actually even interested in meeting me based on my profile photo and then going on from there because i dont think women are physically attracted to me based on my physical appearance.

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To be honest if you're using this site as some kind of "experiment" I can guarantee you're setting yourself up for failure - as it just doesn't work like that.
.
As this thread has evolved I can't quite work out how genuine you are either - being brutally honest it's coming across more and more as either attention seeking or, as I suggested in an earlier post, a weak attempt at getting a sympathy shag - and the pity poor me act is definitely wearing thin.
.
If you're genuinely looking to meet people then be genuinely and authentic you - you've more than hinted at having a lot of positive attributes - quit with the woe is me, put yourself out there into social situations and take any pressure off yourself for anything to happen other than meeting and interacting with others and you'll be surprised how things may change.

[Acanthrite]

Throwing my two cents in on this one...

The post comes across initially as an attempt to garner sympathy, with the hope someone will offer you sympathy sex. The more you speak about your situation though, the more it becomes obvious that it's not your looks which are holding you back, but it's your attitude and most likely your personality as well. 

You are far better looking than me, but yet I've had many successful sexual partners in my life. I believe that's because I have a great personality and I'm confident in what I can offer woman, in and out of the bedroom.

While looks do matter a lot, personality and attitude will always make up for any physical short comings, IMO. 

[ar****]

  2 hours ago, basingstoke671024 said:

arnhem961, ive never heard of ecstatic dance or Tantric dating, I'm an awful dancer btw

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You say you're an awful dancer. You say women may be turned off by you. You say your body language and demeanor are poor and that you must give off bad vibes.
.
To me, that comes across like you aren't really comfortable in the moment, and like you may be too self-conscious to be fully present and provide a safe space for her. I believe that personal development in this matter may be something to seek out.
.
In ecstatic dance, there's no right or wrong. You're channeling the music, aim to "go out of your head". When you are able to fully embody your impulses, without shame or self-consciousness, you'll become authentic in your interactions. That IMO goes a long way to provide a safe space.
.
Likewise, but on a lower threshold, Tantric Dating allows you to connect with women in a more embodied way. Where plain s***ddating is often about cycling tables and the same "WDYD?" questions, tantric interaction is more about the things that aren't said but felt. That's why I would suggest trying a session, it may be confrontational but still give you some pointers to what makes you "uncomfortable" to be around.

[ba****]

gemini_man all my life I have tried to be genuinely and authenticly me and it has not worked. If I try and be myself then I doomed for failure because the genuinely me has too many flaws and will not succeed so I have to try and be someone who I am not to have success

[ba****]

Acanthrite my voice sounds awful and puts women off. I am very confident when it comes to certain things like sports and I'm very competitive. I have been positive and have dated a lot of women so it can't be my attitude

[ba****]

@Handcuffs_1985 Clearly there are lots of things wrong with me otherwise I would have been physical with a woman and had sex by now. I wonder if I'm cursed or there is an hex on me

[ba****]

  6 hours ago, gemini_man said:

To be honest if you're using this site as some kind of "experiment" I can guarantee you're setting yourself up for failure - as it just doesn't work like that.
.
As this thread has evolved I can't quite work out how genuine you are either - being brutally honest it's coming across more and more as either attention seeking or, as I suggested in an earlier post, a weak attempt at getting a sympathy shag - and the pity poor me act is definitely wearing thin.
.
If you're genuinely looking to meet people then be genuinely and authentic you - you've more than hinted at having a lot of positive attributes - quit with the woe is me, put yourself out there into social situations and take any pressure off yourself for anything to happen other than meeting and interacting with others and you'll be surprised how things may change.

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This is the thing being handsome and sexy are completely different. There are many older men in their 80s who are handsome but women would never want sex with them. I'm not saying women don't find me handsome they just don't find me sexy. No sex appeal. I was told by my female supervisor at work that I have 0% sex appeal. Sex appeal is something you ever have or you don't. Women say I look and come across like an immature school boy and that's not sexy to them

[Prettycock99]

  13 hours ago, basingstoke671024 said:

@Prettycock99  if I had been laid plenty of times then I would not be on here trying to gain sympathy. Also if you met me in person then you would know why I've never been laid

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Does that just mean women?

[ba****]

  4 minutes ago, Prettycock99 said:

Does that just mean women?

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I'm Heterosexual. I'm only interested in women.

[Th****]

  1 hour ago, basingstoke671024 said:

This is the thing being handsome and sexy are completely different. There are many older men in their 80s who are handsome but women would never want sex with them. I'm not saying women don't find me handsome they just don't find me sexy. No sex appeal. I was told by my female supervisor at work that I have 0% sex appeal. Sex appeal is something you ever have or you don't. Women say I look and come across like an immature school boy and that's not sexy to them

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Why are you asking your female coworkers? That's grounds for getting reported to HR. 

 

Sounds like you need serious help. And not the online kind were the male "dating coaches" are extremely toxic and have horrible views of women. Stay out of the manosphere. 

 

And if women are telling you are like an immature school boy. You have a lot of work to do growing up.

 

Sounds like therapy would do you a world of good.

Edited Thursday at 03:37 AM by TheMacabreBrat
Add more clarification

[ba****]

  25 minutes ago, TheMacabreBrat said:

Why are you asking your female coworkers? That's grounds for getting reported to HR. 

 

Sounds like you need serious help. And not the online kind were the male "dating coaches" are extremely toxic and have horrible views of women. Stay out of the manosphere. 

 

And if women are telling you are like an immature school boy. You have a lot of work to do growing up.

 

Sounds like therapy would do you a world of good.

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I didn't ask my female coworkers. My line manager at work, ie my supervisor is female and we were having a conversation and she told me that "I had 0% sex appeal"

[Mi****]

  12 hours ago, basingstoke671024 said:

@MisguidedMel Every time I've got "friendly with women" these are women whom I've met in everyday life and not from dating apps, they have always turned me down when I've asked of their interested in going out. I have made the first moves and always been rejected

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Have you tried asking your female friends?

[Acanthrite]

  7 hours ago, basingstoke671024 said:

Acanthrite my voice sounds awful and puts women off. I am very confident when it comes to certain things like sports and I'm very competitive. I have been positive and have dated a lot of women so it can't be my attitude

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How is it possible that you have dated a lot of woman, but yet, have never been physical with a woman?
.
This doesn’t make sense.
.
It has to be your personality and attitude which is holding you back. If woman have dates you in the past, but it lead to nothing, then it’s not because you have an “awful voice” it’s because they realise what you are like as a person, and they leave.

[ge****]

  3 hours ago, basingstoke671024 said:

This is the thing being handsome and sexy are completely different. There are many older men in their 80s who are handsome but women would never want sex with them. I'm not saying women don't find me handsome they just don't find me sexy. No sex appeal. I was told by my female supervisor at work that I have 0% sex appeal. Sex appeal is something you ever have or you don't. Women say I look and come across like an immature school boy and that's not sexy to them

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Being brutally honest - based on this thread, I can understand totally why people would say you come across as an immature school boy as that is exactly what your behaviour here reflects - petulant, woe is me, attention seeking and worse.
.
In fact the more I think about it the more I'm convinced this is all just a game to you and by responding we're fuelling that game - so I'm out.

[ba****]

  6 hours ago, Acanthrite said:

How is it possible that you have dated a lot of woman, but yet, have never been physical with a woman?
.
This doesn’t make sense.
.
It has to be your personality and attitude which is holding you back. If woman have dates you in the past, but it lead to nothing, then it’s not because you have an “awful voice” it’s because they realise what you are like as a person, and they leave.

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I have been on a lot of first dates but never a second date. This first date has just been meeting up for a coffee or a walk. Nothing physical has never taken place during this first date. The women have not wanted a second date with me. They have always told me that there was nothing wrong with the date but there was no romantic connection or chemistry

[ba****]

  8 hours ago, MisguidedMel said:

Have you tried asking your female friends?

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Yes I have, they have always given me a negative response or answer. They have not been able to help

[ba****]

  5 hours ago, gemini_man said:

Being brutally honest - based on this thread, I can understand totally why people would say you come across as an immature school boy as that is exactly what your behaviour here reflects - petulant, woe is me, attention seeking and worse.
.
In fact the more I think about it the more I'm convinced this is all just a game to you and by responding we're fuelling that game - so I'm out.

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Fair enough, I see your point. Just trying to be honest with people at the end of the day.

[ba****]

  7 hours ago, Acanthrite said:

How is it possible that you have dated a lot of woman, but yet, have never been physical with a woman?
.
This doesn’t make sense.
.
It has to be your personality and attitude which is holding you back. If woman have dates you in the past, but it lead to nothing, then it’s not because you have an “awful voice” it’s because they realise what you are like as a person, and they leave.

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The only dates, I've ever been on are from women that I've met online. I've never been on a date with someone who I have known or met in everyday life. That must say a lot. I guess that when women meet me in person they are put off by me. Yes I get a lot of compliments from people saying how kind and helpful I am and I've done a lot of voluntary work and charity work in my life, been to Uganda 4 times to help with voluntary work connected to the Church. So it's not all bad.

[ba****]

  7 hours ago, Acanthrite said:

How is it possible that you have dated a lot of woman, but yet, have never been physical with a woman?
.
This doesn’t make sense.
.
It has to be your personality and attitude which is holding you back. If woman have dates you in the past, but it lead to nothing, then it’s not because you have an “awful voice” it’s because they realise what you are like as a person, and they leave.

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I didn't go on my first date until I was 29 years old. I kept getting rejected by women who I met and got to know in everyday life. Plus I'm neurodivergent which has not helped

[ba****]

By the way all my friends, family, colleagues, etc. Don't understand how I've been single all my life and never been physical with a woman. Because they say that there is nothing fundamentally wrong with me. So is it a hex or a curse?