Body image issues

[Pr****]

Hey so I'm a little with major body image issues that sometimes gets in the way of things, I'm not sure how to cope with getting attention that I'm not use to getting and it sometimes makes my anxiety spike. Anyone have any advice on ideas of how to cope?

[ne****]

What are ur issues?

[pa****]

I always remember that I should appreciate everything about myself and that life is too short to let my uncomfortableness get in the way. I don't want to regret doing things that give me joy because I'm in my head. You will always look back at those times wishing you would have… hope that helps ❤️

[Pr****]

  20 minutes ago, neckgriping_gaging said:

What are ur issues?

Expand  

Honestly I'm always been put down by my family and ex's about my weight, looks, etc. And it's been hard on me since I was 7.

[Pr****]

  18 minutes ago, parkland360623 said:

I always remember that I should appreciate everything about myself and that life is too short to let my uncomfortableness get in the way. I don't want to regret doing things that give me joy because I'm in my head. You will always look back at those times wishing you would have… hope that helps ❤️

Expand  

Thank you I'll make sure to give it a try.

[OpenMIndedSasha]

I think @parkland360623 gave you some great advice and if you haven't done so already I think therapy could be extremely beneficial to you. I say this because when you suffer from *** like that we can tend to attract people to us that are not good for us because we're used to experiencing trauma. I wish you the best.

[Tw****]

Look in the mirror in the morning and say that I am beautiful and f*** whatever the else.Thinks because I am me and I love myself

[Ki****]

Such a relatable issue for me. Self talk is a powerful tool. My therapist had me start doing it and it has helped a bit. If you have a D/s dynamic, incorporating praise and affirmation can be negotiated.

[re****]

Body issues is a tough thing but can be over come. Set yourself a task of taking a photograph of yourself each day. They don't always have to be sexy but at least try to take 2 boudoir style photos a week. There will be photos you hate and some that you love but you will learn to appreciate your body, explore it and learn how to take the best pictures of yourself.
Find the bits of your body that you like and focus on them for images you want to share. For instance if you really like your feet then get a pedicure. If you like your butt show them off in nice panties and you will start getting the attention you desire 🥰🥰. A couple of subs I have done this with and it has done wonders for their self image so I hope it helps you.
Also get a decent selfie stick and remote and it will make picture taking far easier.
But don't rush it's not a race it takes time to build up your body image 🫶🥰

[Qu****]

I once heard a friend say
“for all those things you see in the mirror, and hate about yourself. There are people out there that absolutely love that about you”.
That always made since to me.

[Pi****]

  34 minutes ago, PrincessMidnight0101 said:

Honestly I'm always been put down by my family and ex's about my weight, looks, etc. And it's been hard on me since I was 7.

Expand  

It’s very common for people who grew up with being treated a specific way to them have anxiety when they aren’t treated that way. It almost feels like the other shoe is gonna drop. I feel for you, and hope you know you are a radiant and loved individual.

[Pi****]

To then* have, apologies for the typo.

[No****]

First of all, we all have insecurities and body issues whether we talk about them or not so congratulations on being brave and seeking advice. That’s not something everyone is comfortable enough to do.

I also understand 100%.
I have insecurities and anxiety about my body and it has stopped me from a majority of the opportunities and experiences I’ve had access to throughout my life. I have passed on so many things and people alike because I was too afraid of what I’d look like doing it, what would someone think, would I fail because of it, and every other worry you can imagine.

I regret almost every opportunity I passed on because of my anxiety over my body. I’ve never regretted anything I’ve done when I followed my heart because I know that when I did it, it was what I wanted. Honestly, when it comes to your body, we’re all adults, there’s likely nothing on your body that wasn’t expected or hasn’t been seen before.

All the sudden and extra attention can be overwhelming. You do NOT have to answer everyone. You do NOT need to rush. People with good intentions will still be there. Read profiles and just a simple “no thanks” or “not at this time” with someone who doesn’t seem to align with you is acceptable. Most people will be totally chill about it. The more you pay attention to what you want, the more your confidence will grow as well.

Do what makes you feel good. Dress how you feel good. Most importantly, only entertain people who make you feel good. Who align with how you feel about yourself. If someone isn’t gassing you up and making you feel amazing about yourself, move on. There are people out there who can’t wait to.

I am a plus size woman, new to this as of a year ago (the site, not kink) and it was incredibly difficult to manage at first. Anxiety was insane for all the reasons I’m sure yours is, too. It’ll calm down. There are nice people. I’ve made some great friends who have only ever been friends and they’re awesome support for all matters and not just kink related. Just remember that YOU ARE WORTH IT! You are BEAUTIFUL! You decide who’s worth seeing and touching you, not the other way around. You got this. And reach out any time you want a chat, a confidence boost, or just wanna say hi. I’m here for it.

[ar****]

  55 minutes ago, PrincessMidnight0101 said:

Honestly I'm always been put down by my family and ex's about my weight, looks, etc. And it's been hard on me since I was 7.

Expand  

Good on you that they're your exes now! If they were putting you down, they weren't good for you. You deserve to be with someone who supports and sees you for your true self. If you have a problem with your body, you can either try to work on your body so it'll match what you want, or work on your mind to accept what is.

[Ha****]

I didn’t wake up fat and happy… it’s been a process, an ongoing one. What helped was going to therapy. Having someone outside of my world help me through generational trauma and patterns I didn’t even realize I had. Before therapy, I journaled a lot; still do. It helped me quiet the inner voices of negative thoughts… it’s amazing reading it back how much was others’ opinion of me but weren’t my own.

I will say that it’s not a journey to take solo… having friends, even coworkers, who can be an ear helped me so much! Helps to have someone who isn’t family around to talk with.

[Pr****]

Thank you all so much for kind words and the advice!! You are all very appreciated for it 😊😭 (don't worry not sad tears)

[Da****]

Princess, my precious baby girl. You are absolutely amazing, you have been doing so well with being more comfortable with yourself. I'm glad to see you reaching out to others as well, it can certainly be good to hear it from others and not just me, because we both know I'm biased and could never find any fault in you, appearance or otherwise.

And yes, the sudden influx of attention certainly made your anxiety spike, but you handled it very well and did so well with replying to people. I'm VERY proud of you. Keep your head up and I'm always sitting next to you when you need a break from things and cuddles to make you feel better. I look forward to seeing you interact more and making new friends along the way. Don't ever think you can't do something, I have faith in you and I know you're capable of more than you think. Don't ever think less of yourself. You are amazing and beautiful beyond anything I could imagine I would have the opportunity to love. You have made me a better person by caring for you and helping you with your own issues. I hope that you understand that. Take this as your sign that you are far more than anything that you were told before you met me. It's only because of you that I am a better person, now let's work on you believing in yourself even more. ❤️ I love you Princess. Don't you ever forget that.

[ba****]

I don't think body issues make a whole lot of difference. I have a very athletic figure but it's made no difference in my life when it comes to attracting women

[al****]

Honestly if you don't like the way you look not that what anyone else thinks matters but in my experience if you dont like it then change it girl I don't understand why ppl can't take a whole 15min a day to look the way they want it's really not hard I mean realy it's 15min

[Se****]

  2 hours ago, KinkyFun0101 said:

Princess, my precious baby girl. You are absolutely amazing, you have been doing so well with being more comfortable with yourself. I'm glad to see you reaching out to others as well, it can certainly be good to hear it from others and not just me, because we both know I'm biased and could never find any fault in you, appearance or otherwise.

And yes, the sudden influx of attention certainly made your anxiety spike, but you handled it very well and did so well with replying to people. I'm VERY proud of you. Keep your head up and I'm always sitting next to you when you need a break from things and cuddles to make you feel better. I look forward to seeing you interact more and making new friends along the way. Don't ever think you can't do something, I have faith in you and I know you're capable of more than you think. Don't ever think less of yourself. You are amazing and beautiful beyond anything I could imagine I would have the opportunity to love. You have made me a better person by caring for you and helping you with your own issues. I hope that you understand that. Take this as your sign that you are far more than anything that you were told before you met me. It's only because of you that I am a better person, now let's work on you believing in yourself even more. ❤️ I love you Princess. Don't you ever forget that.

Expand  

I cried when I read this. They are so lucky to have you in their corned supporting them and loving them for who they are. This is the best kind of response every little needs when they are struggling with body image issues. High praise to you kind Sir.

[re****]

I am so sorry you are having these issues, I wish I could tell you something to make you feel more confident. I do think you are lovely and the more you do other people will too. Love you self. Hope you feel better love.

[FetMyLife]

Think about what turns you on in another person. For most of us it isn’t the ‘perfect body’ that society tells us we should like. There are many physical characteristics that I absolutely adore, most of them are considered ‘ugly’ by society. But who decides that? No one asked me what’s attractive. Nobody asks anybody! They just tell us in films and magazines what we ought to like and what we should all aspire to look like but who really likes what they tell us we should? My biggest fetishes are wonky teeth, crows feet wrinkles, veiny arms, saggy boobs and large labia! In men I adore a hairy pot belly, but apparently I’m meant to like washboard abs!? I find little quirks fascinating, when I get a zit I think it makes my face look interesting, like Robert De Niro’s mole. I absolutely adore Adrien Brody’s crocked nose. Whatever you look like there will be plenty of people that completely adore you, exactly as you are. Things that you feel that you’d like to change will be the very same things that make their heart melt. When a girl smiles and she has crooked or goofy teeth I notice them, usually she notices my glance and covers her mouth because she’s embarrassed that they’re not ‘perfect’ but I notice them because for me they are perfect, that’s what I like. I find it so sexy, and I’m definitely not alone. Just remember that whatever you look like, there are more people than you could possibly imagine that think you’re perfect. When you realise this, you begin to feel better being you, without being brainwashed by the nonsense trying to dictate what we should and shouldn’t find attractive.

[xX****]

Hey! I don't have a lot to add, since most of the advice here has been absolutely solid.
I often don't think I'm particularly "beautiful", either. Could always be skinnier, have clearer skin, be shorter, be cuter, etc etc.
Nonetheless, imperfections make you beautiful.
They make you YOU.
Open social media, scroll for ten minutes and you'll see the same faces again and again... loaded with Photoshop and filters.

You're beautiful and you're /real/. A real human being, not just a filter and some distorted images.
All the best, love!

[Da****]

  13 hours ago, SexyWillowBaby said:

I cried when I read this. They are so lucky to have you in their corned supporting them and loving them for who they are. This is the best kind of response every little needs when they are struggling with body image issues. High praise to you kind Sir.

Expand  

Thank you. I do my best to make sure my Princess knows she is beautiful and loved, but sometimes it's just not enough and she needs other people to say it as well. She says my opinion is biased because I love her, but she's starting to see that even with a biased opinion, everything I say is true and confirmed by others saying the same thing. I wish every little had that person to tell them that. If it wasn't for the fact that I'm only one person, I would be there for every little just like I am for mine. The only thing bigger than my heart is my love for adoring people who really need the assurance and praise. It's never okay when I see someone who feels like they're not enough. It breaks my heart.

[Do****]

I think like any changes we have to start with ourselves first. Take it until you make it. I did this and over time it changed the way I looked at myself. And believe it or not, people notice confidence before beauty... I would look at myself in the mirror naked and tell myself I was beautiful. I have a mom body. Stretch marks and all. I would tell myself the things I loved about myself. My eyes, my smile. My married up tummy. And if said with a smile your mind starts to believe these things make you happy. (There is science behind this.) Fake it now and you will believe it later. Smile and compliment yourself. You'll notice yourself changing and others will too.