Spidey Sense

[Mi****]

(This is not a man bash. This is my experience on the right side of the slash. I'd love to read a response from the other side. Iambic pentameter and a rhyme scheme, please 😜)

The submissive Spidey sense. It tingles
when the things you say to us don't quite add up.
When your age is 52 on Feeld, and 50 on FetLife.
When you say you're 5 ft 10, but we meet
and strangely, we're eye to eye. When your pics
span a decade or more, and it's the recent ones
that hide your face. When you tell us we can't call
once the work day is over, like a Gremlin
you can't feed after midnight. When you say
you're not into DDlg, or much younger subs,
but in your FetLife we see the groups you joined.
When you ask us for aggressive truths, but
hold your own close to your chest. When answers
change, from Tuesday to Friday, from month one
to month six. And more fool us, because we see
that first red flag. The little inconsistency.
And we brush it off. Even as nagging doubt
plants its flag in the pit of our stomach. We wait,
we watch, and pretty soon along comes issue
number two. Something sideways. We know then.
The honestly, the transparency we were building,
is a one-sided endeavor. Shame on me, because
I'll probably let you fool me twice. For now.
The doomsday clock is tocking. Three strikes
and you're out. Foiled again. The drawing board
dragged back out into the living room.
I knew it, we'll confide, quietly, to closest friends.
That Spidey sense. The gut. It's never wrong.

[Ev****]

is this just roleplay or is this an actual happening i read everything just confused

[Mi****]

  1 minute ago, EvalynEXE said:

is this just roleplay or is this an actual happening i read everything just confused

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Nothing is happening, it's a list of the little white lies that seem inconsequential but really damage trust.

[ba****]

Guts never wrong I'm sorry

There's some gross and dum individuals on here please look after your guys self

[TM****]

It happens both ways, unfortunately. The truth may hurt but the lies are devastating. People who can't be fully truthful are a dime a dozen. The truthful one scares so many away. In a relationship that survives on honest communication. There is no room for the week ones.

[CookieMaster416]

This was beautiful. I feel your ***, your attempt to give benefit of the doubt knowing you shouldn’t, but also the gift of submission in hopes everything you see amounts to nothing. I’m sorry, on behalf of all Dominants out there that appreciate the gift our submissive gives us. I hope you find one someday that gives you the respect, trust, and honesty you deserve.

[Ge****]

I agree with everything you wrote. Experienced it my own way on the other side of the slash. In a world where truth and trust is ever so much more important than it would already be. There it’s sometimes nowhere to be found. It’s hidden in plain slight. Hidden what’s not even there. It happens to us all. Not a thing of role. Not a thing of gender. A human thing. The human condition as they say. Hiding the good ones of all roles. The good ones of all genders. Equality has arrived. Arrived as all are human. All are different. And within different is the chance. Then there is the honest ones. There is the true ones. May they attract each other in this sea.

[Shilo66]

As someone has already stated, unfortunately this type of lying happens both ways. Which is why I thank you for your observation, because what you've stated vindicates my approach. 

You see, when I first come into contact with anyone, I'm happy to chat on this medium for a very short while, but then I want to move to video chatting as soon as possible... BECAUSE, on video chat, there's CURRENTLY no way for people to hide who or what they really are!... in other words, CATFISH!

From my experience, those who are genuine, do not mind video chatting because they've got nothing to hide and can prove what they say about themselves is true. On top of that, if you're paying attention during your video chats, you can pick up most of the little cues when someone is lying or being inconsistent.

Anytime I get someone who is 'dragging their feet' about doing a video chat, then MY "Spidey Senses" start tingling, and I quickly start to back away from the whole conversation.

Then, when they flat-out refuse to do a video chat, BUT, still want to keep chatting on here, that's when I go into full 'Robbie the Robot Lost-In-Space' mode...

"DANGER, WILL ROBINSON, DANGER!!!"

...including the flailing Arms, LOL

...and I'll end things there and then.

Edited April 8 by Shilo66

[Deleted Member]

Fet life is nothing but catfish.. trust me, and what's worse a few inches shorter or the extra 100+ lbs they didn't think you would notice

[Bl****]

I expect the sweet lies since everyone will wear a mask until you strip away the facade. It’s human nature to protect ourselves which includes the ego, it’s only when someone would embrace the delusion as truth and peddle it like a snake oil salesman without any form of tact. Then I have an issue. At that they are not interesting anymore and cannot be forgiven.

[Pr****]

The worst is people getting your ID through your phone number then trying to extort you about extorting your kink. Im a business man and father. Im proud of who i am but i dont want associates knowing my stuff.
But yes. I believe in using a google voice number then quickly getting to a video call and public meet up.

[Sl****]

I never understood this just be honest. You will get into fast more positive situation that can last for a much longer time if everyone is on the same page.

[sardonicus87]

  11 hours ago, Shilo66 said:

As someone has already stated, unfortunately this type of lying happens both ways. Which is why I thank you for your observation, because what you've stated vindicates my approach. 

You see, when I first come into contact with anyone, I'm happy to chat on this medium for a very short while, but then I want to move to video chatting as soon as possible... BECAUSE, on video chat, there's CURRENTLY no way for people to hide who or what they really are!... in other words, CATFISH!

From my experience, those who are genuine, do not mind video chatting because they've got nothing to hide and can prove what they say about themselves is true. On top of that, if you're paying attention during your video chats, you can pick up most of the little cues when someone is lying or being inconsistent.

Anytime I get someone who is 'dragging their feet' about doing a video chat, then MY "Spidey Senses" start tingling, and I quickly start to back away from the whole conversation.

Then, when they flat-out refuse to do a video chat, BUT, still want to keep chatting on here, that's when I go into full 'Robbie the Robot Lost-In-Space' mode...

"DANGER, WILL ROBINSON, DANGER!!!"

...including the flailing Arms, LOL

...and I'll end things there and then.

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I have nothing to hide, but I absolutely HATE video chatting. It's something I would be willing to do once to prove myself that I am who I say I am, but I'm genuine and absolutely do mind very much video chatting, and I'm sure I'm not the only one.
.
To me, it's awkward and uncanny and makes me uncomfortable as hell. I can't stand seeing myself in the camera, so I also wouldn't doubt if I would come off wrong or like I am lying or something just because it's so uncomfortable to me.
.
I'd much rather meet in person at like, a café or something, in public.
.
Not that any of that matters, nothing ever gets to that point anyway.

[Windwolf]

I don't mind texting for a short time or a telephone conversation or even a video chat, but I give my word, everything will stay platonic entirely until we have met for coffee or dinner or some other public place so that we can talk face to face.
Maybe it's just because I am old fashioned but I know what to look for in person.

[Di****]

@Windwolf I like your style, but how old are your dates? I’m in a weirdly normal gen-x pickle type mood about all this. Coffee or dinner sounds more like a settlement agreement and I think wtf. I’m not doing romancing the stones in order with as over stimulated as we are with information I’ve decided on a method for getting transparency and that’s two things. No sex on a first date. But second date can begin in the morning if I trust you and we also get pancakes. And we just spoon through the awkward. That awkwardness is ok, but it’s intense enough over like 9 months. Way too long for 2025 so you got to be honest and see how it goes. I like to hear your song first and focus on your joy and like reverb on it. Like I like to dig it just feels good. You dig?

[Windwolf]

Lol well we won't be dating using any methods. Petite ladies are what tickles my fancy.
My method works for me. Since I am only interested in 24/7 rl I am not interested in an online relationship.
I have been married twice.
My first marriage lasted 10 years.
My second wife was my first real life sub and we were married for 41 years before she died.
Online has turned everything into a fast food mentality.
I became a bench tech for a computer company back in the late 80s.
Since then I have watched the whole online world go in hyperdrive.
It seems that this is the online version of s***d dating.
I have been contacted by an average of 4 to 5 women a day and out of all of them 31 have turned out to be scammers .
The first time I do is screenshot their pictures and do a facial recognition software analysis. Most of them popped right up.
Unfortunately a few are smart enough not to steal pictures from social media sites.
Right off the bat the rest wanted my offsite chat ID and or my phone number. At that point I blocked them.
If they had bothered to read my profile ,they would have known how that would turn out.
Since I am not interested in long distance , online or other non personal relationships I am a suitable match for women who are looking for those things.
I am willing to chat here with any potential candidates long enough to discover if our expectations for dynamics line up as well as our kinks and hopes for the future.
If someone isn't close enough for us to at least meet halfway after a couple of phone conversations, then we will have both wasted our time.
I am not interested in hookups, I'm not interested in role playing. BDSM is not an RPG for me.
I'm looking for someone to spend the rest of our lives together in real life.
Everyone has their own desires and hopes and everyone has the right to do it their way. But I believe in being up front and that is why my profile let's people know what I expect from others and what others can expect from me.

[Windwolf]

  38 minutes ago, DiDet said:

Windwolfs I like your style, but how old are your dates? I’m in a weirdly normal gen-x pickle type mood about all this. Coffee or dinner sounds more like a settlement agreement and I think wtf. I’m not doing romancing the stones in order with as over stimulated as we are with information I’ve decided on a method for getting transparency and that’s two things. No sex on a first date. But second date can begin in the morning if I trust you and we also get pancakes. And we just spoon through the awkward. That awkwardness is ok, but it’s intense enough over like 9 months. Way too long for 2025 so you got to be honest and see how it goes. I like to hear your song first and focus on your joy and like reverb on it. Like I like to dig it just feels good. You dig?

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I didn't answer your question so I will now.
My dates are ranging in age from late 30s to mid 50s. But age isn't the important factor for me. A spiritual connection is the most important part of relationship development for me.

[Di****]

Age may not be but generational differences aside. Your traumas are not mine. You want worship, I get it. It’s a dude thing. Everyone wants the Leo DeCap to fall asleep with joy toiling away. But turning your love approval light on and off makes it seem fake. But I don’t know… this world is not our home it’s hell or maybe purgatory. All we can really do is help others feel good emotions. The rest is just ignorance and death and mental illness. You should try submitting sometime. I have a friend, a detective, she likes to wrestle. I think she would love to meet you actually lmk ihuu

[Windwolf]

Have you read my profile?

[Windwolf]

  9 minutes ago, DiDet said:

Age may not be but generational differences aside. Your traumas are not mine. You want worship, I get it. It’s a dude thing. Everyone wants the Leo DeCap to fall asleep with joy toiling away. But turning your love approval light on and off makes it seem fake. But I don’t know… this world is not our home it’s hell or maybe purgatory. All we can really do is help others feel good emotions. The rest is just ignorance and death and mental illness. You should try submitting sometime. I have a friend, a detective, she likes to wrestle. I think she would love to meet you actually lmk ihuu

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I don't seek to be worshipped.
I don't seek to tear someone down and humiliate and punish them either.
Yeah I know about detective work too. Been there done that.

But my suggestion to you is simpler.
If you don't want someone else's option , stay out of their posts.
This is a saints and sinners place.
It's just a people place and people have different opinions.
I didn't ask you for yours and you didn't have to ask me for mine.

[Di****]

Yes it’s not my cup of water and I don’t like your vibe. But I don’t like men. They are *** and gross quite frankly 99% of the time. Manifest Destiny remember that? Takanasee and at least your honest to a point right!

[Di****]

This is my post nah. I’m dominating you with kindness as you cross represent yourself to demonstrate what? Your value to others? We all deserve to be respected like that. You don’t need to apologize either. Just go with god my friend. Take care or your post. I’ll find my way home. I was unaware that you post your rulez. As your DOMINANT now I will permit this shenanigans behavior without regulation at this time. Your words curve back on themselves like asps.

[Gregpsycho]

  On 4/9/2025 at 1:49 AM, DiDet said:

This is my post nah. I’m dominating you with kindness as you cross represent yourself to demonstrate what? Your value to others? We all deserve to be respected like that. You don’t need to apologize either. Just go with god my friend. Take care or your post. I’ll find my way home. I was unaware that you post your rulez. As your DOMINANT now I will permit this shenanigans behavior without regulation at this time. Your words curve back on themselves like asps.

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This entire interaction seems very childish and unnecessary. This entire side conversation started because you felt the need to judge @Windwolf's way of doing things. Like it was any of your business in the first place. There are an ubsurd amount of bot profiles and scammers, not even mentioning how many serial killers there are in the world. In an app where we are asking people to tie us up and trying to be ***, I would not discourage anyone's vetting process. The second response was full of toxic judgement as well. Good luck with that. Like I've said multiple times in life, "when you smell like shit, only other people that smell like shit can't stand to be near you."

[x-****]

We just spoke about this, I’m glad you posted on the topic.  We seem to have an innate ability to know when something isn’t adding up 🕷️ 

 

Oh dear…,  it appears someone hijacked your  post *sighs* 

[Mi****]

  2 hours ago, x-BlueDiamond-x said:

We just spoke about this, I’m glad you posted on the topic.  We seem to have an innate ability to know when something isn’t adding up 🕷️ 

 

Oh dear…,  it appears someone hijacked your  post *sighs* 

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As always...