Vetting process for littles and caregivers

[Na****]

Thank you, this helps so much being a new little x

[Ar****]

2 hours ago, NewbieEm12 said:

Thank you, this helps so much being a new little x

I'm very happy to hear it, I hope you're having a brighter day than yesterday x

[Deleted Member]

Thank you!! I’m new to the DDlg dynamic

[Ar****]

1 minute ago, rosielauv said:

Thank you!! I’m new to the DDlg dynamic

Welcome, stay safe and I hope you have an amazing time with it! 🤗

[mo****]

Hi I’m new to this too, thanks for the great insight! was wondering where we would find said groups like you mentioned?

[Ar****]

6 hours ago, moonbeam_ll said:

Hi I’m new to this too, thanks for the great insight! was wondering where we would find said groups like you mentioned?

The particular one I mentioned was on regular bread-and-butter social media, there are several there and you might have to try a few to find the one/s you're comfortable with.

Otherwise if you run a standard internet search (for littles and caregivers groups) you'll come up with plenty of hits for forums and dedicated discord groups. Just be sure to be careful as always and get a good feel for anywhere you join before diving in too deeply 🙂👍

[Lu****]

As I have just started my journey, this has been very helpful. There are so much information out there which can be overwhelming and mind boggling. Having come across this has answered some of my questions as I have been stumped on what to ask, how to ask and where to start. So thank you for sharing!

[Kl****]

Thank you for the post. Im new in this world. You definitely made me think more about not coming off as pathetic or desperate and about not blindly jumping into something that could be sketchy. Much appreciated.

[Ar****]

6 hours ago, Klover999 said:

Thank you for the post. Im new in this world. You definitely made me think more about not coming off as pathetic or desperate and about not blindly jumping into something that could be sketchy. Much appreciated.

That's wonderful to know 😊 Take your time and avail yourself of the wonderful advice and resources you'll find here, and it will stand you in good stead.

[bi****]

This post helps out a lot it helps me focus on what I need to observe and look for since I’m really new so thank you

[Ar****]

8 hours ago, jeepbear22 said:

This post helps out a lot it helps me focus on what I need to observe and look for since I’m really new so thank you

You're welcome, it's what we're here for! Good luck 🙂

[Sc****]

I really do appreciate this info as I am newbie and looking for someone to explore with. This has answered some of my questions! I wasn’t sure what to look for or ask! So thank you for sharing! 🙂

[Ar****]

33 minutes ago, Scottygirl4 said:

I really do appreciate this info as I am newbie and looking for someone to explore with. This has answered some of my questions! I wasn’t sure what to look for or ask! So thank you for sharing! 🙂

It's just my perspective, but I'm really glad it's answered some of your questions. Good luck and stay safe 🙂

[DD****]

I'm new to the wanting to be a LB in an extreme age play with a trusting and caring daddy or couple. I've spent 22 years trying to come to terms with my past trauma and I feel that if I submit fully to being a LB that I will get to make memories in a situation in which I get to control what daddy does and doesn't do.

[Ar****]

2 hours ago, OKDDLGDOMSUBLUV said:

I'm new to the wanting to be a LB in an extreme age play with a trusting and caring daddy or couple. I've spent 22 years trying to come to terms with my past trauma and I feel that if I submit fully to being a LB that I will get to make memories in a situation in which I get to control what daddy does and doesn't do.

All I will say is please be careful, the last thing you want to do is get yourself into a situation which will make you feel worse about things. I hope you find what you are looking for and that it helps to bring the resolution you seek.

[DD****]

54 minutes ago, Aranhis said:

All I will say is please be careful, the last thing you want to do is get yourself into a situation which will make you feel worse about things. I hope you find what you are looking for and that it helps to bring the resolution you seek.

I'm past the *** on the emotional front. It was pretty horrific and I've been trying to find ways to own particular situations for over 30 years total. I'm a situational and physical fulfillment little. I'd like to see it that way anyway. I've been in a ddlg relationship for 22 years. My wife is absolutely my soulmate. What hasn't went away is the moment to moment memory of the ***. I was not able to control that nor stop it. Choosing to become an ageplay little has allowed me to make new similar situational memories and hopefully it works to alleviate the *** of the memory.

[DD****]

I'm picky to a fault and having been a dom I know how to act

[ba****]

also std testinggg

[Th****]

@Aranhis Bravo for that post my friend I can heartely second everything within it.

When Sara and I got together we talked and talked for exactly the reasons you mentioned. In fact I can recall a slightly stilted conversation between the two of us where we had to admit that at the stage we were at we were becoming more than friends.

So we met up and two years on we are making final plans to be in the same country permanently.

Taking time and being picky does have its benefits😊

[Ar****]

1 hour ago, Thebian said:

@Aranhis Bravo for that post my friend I can heartely second everything within it.

When Sara and I got together we talked and talked for exactly the reasons you mentioned. In fact I can recall a slightly stilted conversation between the two of us where we had to admit that at the stage we were at we were becoming more than friends.

So we met up and two years on we are making final plans to be in the same country permanently.

Taking time and being picky does have its benefits😊

Ahhhh @ThebianI am so happy for you both, I'm literally grinning away here over your plans 😁

Thank you for your kind words and support, I have immense respect for you so that means a great deal to me 🙏

[Mudd-man]

Hi, so I've been a cg a few times to different Littles, I was introduced into this life online by someone after an ex who I had raised a stepdaughter with left me, and I found my love for it. I always wanted to be a daddy since I was a kid, and I loved being a step dad. When I was brought into this lifestyle, I was still broken, and I found that it was so cathartic to take care of someone. The first, I ended up in a relationship with, though she was a massive red flag and hurt me in the end. The second drifted away, and now I'm on my third, and we have dated for 2 months. After the first month she told me she was "embarrassed" to be a little with me, and she has seemed to withdraw some from me, both the frequency of contact as well as emotionally. She has alot going on in her life, but I worry that maybe she is receiving her care from someone else, and I don't really know what to do.

[Ar****]

3 hours ago, Mudd-man said:

Hi, so I've been a cg a few times to different Littles, I was introduced into this life online by someone after an ex who I had raised a stepdaughter with left me, and I found my love for it. I always wanted to be a daddy since I was a kid, and I loved being a step dad. When I was brought into this lifestyle, I was still broken, and I found that it was so cathartic to take care of someone. The first, I ended up in a relationship with, though she was a massive red flag and hurt me in the end. The second drifted away, and now I'm on my third, and we have dated for 2 months. After the first month she told me she was "embarrassed" to be a little with me, and she has seemed to withdraw some from me, both the frequency of contact as well as emotionally. She has alot going on in her life, but I worry that maybe she is receiving her care from someone else, and I don't really know what to do.

Thank you for sharing and seeking advice. The first thing I'm going to say is something I don't want you to take the wrong way or feel judged for as that isn't my intention, but is something I've picked up on from what you've written which I feel might be quite important to your situation. 

I have to wonder if you are - here and now in the space you're currently in - in the right place to be a cg to littles. You've got love and affection to share which is great, however if you're still feeling broken and there is any overhang from that previous relationship which you're still seeking catharsis for, then I'd ask yourself to take a step back and consider waiting until you've healed some more before continuing to rely on these connections to fix what ails. Littles are *** enough already and don't need to have responsibility for sorting our issues out too.

As for your current little, two months is not all that long to be dating. When did the withdrawal start, and what reasons do you have to suspect somebody else may be involved with her? I would suggest that the nature of your relationship (cg and little) oughtn't have any bearing on your issue, it's a universal one. The two of you need to be able to communicate. The two of you need to be able to trust. She needs to be the one you talk to about this, and if she won't engage because of how she is withdrawn all you can do is lay out how you feel. Things are not sustainable as they currently are and only a dialogue with her will change that. Be a safe space for her to open up honestly about how she feels and what she wants from you. Hopefully she will take that opportunity; if not, I think you already know you're going to struggle having a healthy future together.

[Tr****]

Having a Mutual Understanding of wat Both parties Need/Want is Very Important in This process… I’m a lil myself and being Understood is Very important to me Personally … talking about thing Both parties Want to Do or Work on is Also Very Important … Communication is Definitely the Key

[se****]

A Dom is honest, protective, disciplinarian, lover, best friend, open and understands that both sides of the dynamic are just as important. Both sides are lucky to have someone they trust so deeply that they are willing to take complete control or release complete control to another without ***.

[An****]

I really like your description of the vetting process, just wanted to add to not let your previous experiences let you get too paranoid over assumed "inconsistencies"(i know easier said than done). Not ddlg but I had what had potenial to become a nice friendship thrown away and blocked without any chance for me to explain , just because someone saw a pic of me w different hair color and thought I lied when I said I had this and that hair RIGHT NOW. They didnt think about that it could have simply been an older pic which it was 😭