What is the definition of vanilla and switch?

[ju****]

Im new here and still learning. I'm wondering just what is vanilla? An  what about switch? That means you go from man to woman? Thank Kinkters

[TheBookCollector]

Vanilla means different things to different people, but its usually applied to people who are relatively normal in thier sexual desires.

A switch is an individual that can be dominant or submissive depending on the circumstances. For example, someone may be submissive with someone from the opposite sex but dominant with someone from the same sex.

[Strengan]

The missionary position is the epitome of vanilla sex. (I don’t know why ‘vanilla’ was chosen as what is effectively a pejorative label meaning boring sex because as far as I am concerned vanilla is the best ice cream flavour!)

A switch is someone who is comfortable at adopting both dominant and submissive roles in bdsm. Like all labels it is a simplification but almost everyone who is part of this community will understand the term.

And two switches can exchange these roles within a relationship and this gives a lot of opportunity and scope to form a symmetrical partnership as the balance of power is formally, at least, far more equal than one between a sub and Dom.

[Phoenyx]

"Vanilla" refers to more "traditional" relationships.  It is meant to infer plain and/or bland.  However, you may encounter some who will hurl that term at anyone who does not agree with them.  So, the term needs to be taken with a grain of salt.

A "switch" is someone who can be either dominant or submissive in a relationship.  The choice of role can depend on the particular desires of the moment.  "Switch" has often been applied to those in a hierarchy, where they are dominant with one person, and submissive to another.  However, it more-often refers to someone who can be dominant or submissive in the same relationship.

[lolli-leigh]

a great book for newbies is SM101 Bdsm a brief introduction x

[Leisa]

A vanilla relationship is a traditional relationship which may or may not contain what those in the relationship term a kinky sexual relationship. It’s not one where there is a hierarchy of that of a dominant and a submissive clearly defined. A switch is a person who can take on either role depending on the relationship they are in though many are more comfortable in one role or the other depending on the dynamic of that relationship. Regardless of which term one defines their dynamic to be it should always be about mutual respect and acceptance.

[sm****]

another good book to start out on was always "screw the rosses give me the thorns"