I am looking for a Femdom Dating Site - Any Advice?

[ey****]

4 minutes ago, Krateros said:

I'd like to point out that I said most seem to have something disgusting about them. I am not judging entire personalities nor am I claiming that is a fact. I am quite new in the sceene. I just know what women complain about in real life as well as online in terms of unpleasant subs... and the few I met, who said openly that they are, were very peasant people to talk to... until they learned about a woman being dominant or even just switch and then went nuts.

I get you.

I think there are a lot of bad habits that guys masquerading as subs have - although, Dommes frustrations are of course valid and can be learned from.  But you have to accept the bias that you will hear more examples of bad behaviour than good.  

 

6 minutes ago, Krateros said:

One munch organisator said the inofficial goal for 90% of participients is finding a (play)partner. To be honest I think munches are perfect for dating... if you are not monogamius. I just need to get into a conversation without seeming like a creep, which is easy at a munch with discussion topics. I got a phone number at every single munch I went on. Sadly they all turned out to be poly, which is not my cup of tea.

if you are in Germany things may be slightly different; but in general the function of a munch is NOT for dating or to find a play partner.  That does not mean someone won't end up dating or becoming a play partner but when people turn up looking for a relationship rather than to partake in community is when things break down.

Because (a) they get disappointed they don't get what they want and so stop attending,  or sometimes (b) they stop attending once they get what they want 

It feels like you are turning up looking to find a monogamous partner and so are then being disappointed you don't get the results you want. 

[Kr****]

On 11/15/2024 at 7:21 PM, eyemblacksheep said:

if you are in Germany things may be slightly different; but in general the function of a munch is NOT for dating or to find a play partner.  That does not mean someone won't end up dating or becoming a play partner but when people turn up looking for a relationship rather than to partake in community is when things break down.

Because (a) they get disappointed they don't get what they want and so stop attending,  or sometimes (b) they stop attending once they get what they want 

It feels like you are turning up looking to find a monogamous partner and so are then being disappointed you don't get the results you want. 

To be honest I didn't quite figure it out yet, what participating in the community means in this case. Can you explain it to me? I am for example into model building, so I visit events where people share their creations, because presenting is an integral part of it. Larping or pen&paper is a collaborative hobby per se... Bdsm and Kink on the other hand is something I do not share that way. It isn't a lifestyle to me like many others.

[ey****]

22 minutes ago, Krateros said:

To be honest I didn't quite figure it out yet, what participating in the community means in this case. Can you explain it to me? I am for example into model building, so I visit events where people share their creations, because presenting is an integral part of it. Larping or pen&paper is a collaborative hobby per se... Bdsm and Kink on the other hand is something I do not share that way. It isn't a lifestyle to me like many others.

so yep, that is generally what the kink community is

the early recognised munches were effectively meet ups from folk on an old usenet group (there were of course kink meets prior to this, but different time and different purpose) which was effectively well, I dunno, imagine if this website said "Hey why don't forum members meet in this day in this town"

in more modern days munches served different purposes - the first local one here for example was a Sunday when there was a play event on the Thursday, and so the purpose was basically socialising ahead of the event, who was bringing what, while also for any newbies to meet others who were attending before going along

modern day is a bit more varied, but, again - the idea of going to munches is to partake in community, because you intend to regularly meet with others in the kink lifestyle, because you want to go to kink events and know others who will be there.    And of course, a lot of people do find partners via community, the primary set up of community events is not to meet someone.

Because otherwise people turn up and then stop going cos either (a) they find someone (b) they don't find someone so don't bother. 

[Kr****]

On 11/18/2024 at 10:20 PM, eyemblacksheep said:

modern day is a bit more varied, but, again - the idea of going to munches is to partake in community, because you intend to regularly meet with others in the kink lifestyle, because you want to go to kink events and know others who will be there.    And of course, a lot of people do find partners via community, the primary set up of community events is not to meet someone.

Because otherwise people turn up and then stop going cos either (a) they find someone (b) they don't find someone so don't bother. 

Well, in that case I should probably stop going there... i do not want to take part in play events and while I enjoy a huge range of kinky activities in the bedroom, I do not see it as a relevant part about my personality, so I would never speak about it as my life style... ^^' I just enjoyed to have nice nerdy people around me, of which all women are kinky, which is nice to know flirting after a relationship with a cute woman, who was the exact opposide.

[ey****]

yep - I think at it's simplest. If you go to munches to meet someone; and then meet someone. What next?

OK, so you might then stop going to munches because you found someone.  But what about her? Does she now also have to stop attending munches and events? Does she have to stop seeing any friends she made via them or attending events she enjoys?

If she is going to events etc and she wants to go with a sub, is this going to be with you? Or, of course if she is still attending munches without you, does she now go to another event with someone who does wish to partake in community?

[Kr****]

On 11/29/2024 at 10:33 AM, eyemblacksheep said:

yep - I think at it's simplest. If you go to munches to meet someone; and then meet someone. What next?

OK, so you might then stop going to munches because you found someone.  But what about her? Does she now also have to stop attending munches and events? Does she have to stop seeing any friends she made via them or attending events she enjoys?

If she is going to events etc and she wants to go with a sub, is this going to be with you? Or, of course if she is still attending munches without you, does she now go to another event with someone who does wish to partake in community?

I think what is by far more important to ask is what's before. I communicate honestly and clear, who I am and what I want. I refuse sex until I am in a commited exclusive relationship and spoke about what happens in case of pregnancy. If a women does not lie to me (which I must be allowed to assume from an equal) there won't be any of those issues.

I have polyamorous people among my friends and am still close to most of my exes on a platonic level. I am not sleeping with any of them. In fact I fount some male and female platonic buddies through munches. So I don't see the issue with friendships to be honest.

As far as I know you do not have to sleep with anyone you meet on munches, do you? I experienced it as usefull to hear other peoples ideas for my dominant role and I still like the memories of my ex talking to a shop employee about us when buying a strapon...

She can go to play events whenever and with whoever she wants. She should just have enough character to break up with me instead of cheating. 

[pu****]

Are you in the UK? There is a dating app but it doesn't work in the USA

[Rainydaye88]

Huh. It's interesting that this topic floated back to the top. There actually is an app for this now that was created. I recently deleted my profile, though, cause there really isn't much of a user base yet and was going to check in later, but Chyrpe is an app that is structured for FLR. They do allow for fin-domme, but they have to mark their profile as that to use the app before getting on. I've actually met a good boy from there, and we do meet once and a while to see how things are going.