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Thinking about integrating BDSM into my lifestyle


chained4You

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chained4You
Posted

Hello, I’m a very submissive man, and I know I can’t get rid of kink from my sexuality, and I know I’ve had a desire to have a lifestyle BDSM relationship with a Dominant woman for a long time. I am interested in hearing from people about how you can integrate the Lifestyle into your life and how to navigate any problems with the outside vanilla world we live in?

Posted

There's many ways to integrate this into your life

But, a lot - well - people are so different and it's a case of what would you want from this hypothetical relationship and what barriers exist?

I think... there's a lot of tropes and most of them are fairly wrong.  On the surface, most D/s relationships are fairly 'normal' and shouldn't be affecting things like your ability to work, or see friends or family and so on.

If you were in a vanilla relationship you wouldn't go to a friends house and start fucking on the sofa, and by the same token if you're in a D/s relationship you probably wouldn't be acting out your dynamic there either (although, there could still be hints where there's clear authority)

Equally, if you do want to dress a certain way - there are fetish clubs.   If you want to be around people where it's safe to talk kink there are munches.  

 

Posted

If you are comfortable and confident with your sexuality then you will have the faith to follow your desires. The main problem with the vanilla world is that imaginations conjure up all sorts of negative thoughts concerning what we do or don’t do. No matter how much you try to explain and reassure there will always be idiots who will ridicule you for your choices. People that love you will understand and accept your sexuality as long as you erase their worrying thoughts for your safety. Depending upon your profession you may need to keep it a secret . I’m fortunate to have lived a life openly accepting my fetish needs with out the stress of my employers intolerance. Career choices will determine how much you integrate your kink in your life. I’m sure the bondage dungeons are full of judges and mps at the weekends who would rather you and I were unaware of. 🙏❤️

Posted

First, does you personal circumstances allow, *** and control is key area of this.
Second, Find a Domme that is looking for a LTR and start casual.
Third, Contract:
Establish whether you limit your lifestyle within the confines of your home. This a good basis or even a bedroom. Your Domme would set rules and expectations according your limits. To cover all eventualities. Like vanilla friends coming over. Hope this helps

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