Brat taming

[Deleted Member]

Hello, I am new to bdsm and my girlfriend is a brat. I am a real soft top or switch. So being dominance is one thing and whenever I try she won't obey and is in generel real bratty. I know she does it to keep me on my toes and hopefully get some sort of reward. But I am not sure what to say or do. I just sort of panic. I want her to listen to me but I don't know exactly how. She's sadly stronger than I am, so pinning her down is quiet hard.. :0

So I was wondering if anyone had tips and tricks how to make her obey and maybe what to say etc etc. Also if anyone had some fun punishment. 🙏🙏🙏

[J99]

I dont usually comment on things like this, but here we go...
In my opinion, it sounds like she wants something more primal based, where you would fight her to the ground and pin her to stop her from doing whatever she's doing.
I would say this is something to talk about because if it is what she wants then you can first find out more about what you both want from this perspective, and secondly, hire in some (heavy) help to pin her down (that's half joking but it is an option if you were happy with it).

Normally I would say that a sub usually wants to submit and follow instruction, and if they're being bratty it's to be challenged and punished, but I would usually expect a sub to be fairly willing to take their punishment and follow instruction to a degree. This makes me think even more that it's more of a primal desire she has, but I'm no expert.

For punishments I think bondage is a good option for you to try, and then potentially try stuff like making her eat from a dog bowl or sleeping on the floor or in a cage.

[pt****]

Communication is key. Make sure you have established limits and expectations. Your both on a journey and you need to try new things. So, after doing the aforementioned. You can chose to do the passive or active role, passive being task derived with punishments. Or active, which after disobedience is established, grab her by the hair and tell her she a bad girl and will be punished, slap her face and get inventive. Good luck being a brat tamer is not easy and leads to frustration. Btw have a discussion as to what you do and don’t like afterwards so you can grow and learn. Good luck and enjoy.

[Ch****]

Hello there,
I am not experienced but I feel that you need to be more assertive and more strict. Given the consensual type of relationship I think there is space for you to become more aggressive and implement harder punishment. You can surprise her with ad hoc slapping or whipping in a way that shows that you are not negotiating at the time being.

[He****]

Hi,

It's me, I'm the brat here 

[Ch****]

Sorry did not realise on time that you were connected. Apologies

[He****]

10 minutes ago, Christian-2070 said:

Sorry did not realise on time that you were connected. Apologies

Haha, don't worry, it's fine

Also, regarding your ideas above, I would most definitely not be against any of that

 

 

[Ch****]

Thanks 😊.

[Deleted Member]

In my experience (so please note, not taking for anybody), a brat often disobeys, because they feel an urge to do so. Taking in a moment, feeling your dominant calm energy can make people nervous, ie action -> disobedience. Personally my goal is always to ground the person with "punishment", any most of the time it's doesn't require strength. A brat has two sides, a good "girl" and a bad "girl". Preise the good one and ground your brat back to you when the bad one comes to shine. Make her wear handcuffs or garment that restricted their movement so you can easily guide her and focus on the delicate parts like the nipples and clit. Don't *** it, it takes time for both. Make sure you have fun and if you keep the emotional communication and empathic bound flowing, you will both hit beautiful groundbreaking moments that will get you close together. Ps sometimes the best punishment is no punishment at all. Try to get in her mind, you make the rules. And i would also punish her for just jumping in your conversation, not much, just to show you know and that you care.

I hope that sharing my experience was somehow useful and wish you a lot of fun!!!